Friends

[qwerty]

What qualities should I look for in friends, I always seem to end up being decieved, they take advantage of me by not being loyal when I am honest,

[Shamou]

Hello and welcome aboard qwerty...

Hope that you like it here and that you make lots of friends...

As for your question... I think you've answered yourself... you want friends who are loyal and honest...

My guess is that you are not very old... so, I can tell you that it is not easy to get good friends... so, if one comes along... take good care of him or her because you may not get another one...

Good luck and may you find that special friend...

.

[Uplift]

Gidday qwerty, I can relate to what you are saying. I was abused as a kid, and that set me up for blaming myself, and ultimately creating a poor self image about myself. As I carried that around, I would find myself in abusive situations, and relationships and friendships. In a classic catch twenty two, self perpetuating, snowballing effect, things just kept rolling along. Finally I got sick of it, and learned to change myself, and view, and value myself differently...which isn't always easy, especially if you feel that you haven't, and haven't actually done anything wrong. But, after much resistance, and discomfort, I eventually bit the bullet, and accepted that I was creating, and attracting the situations. There are a myriad of things that can unconsciously effect, and colour our self image, and self esteem negatively, and you don't have to be abused or necessarily have experienced anything bad for it to happen. But, as I described earlier, the effect, once started, if not recognised and dealt with, acts in the classic snowball scenario. The deluxe news is, you recognise a situation you want to change, and are already acting on it. Very wise, very empowering. My advice is to put all that good energy into changing you, your self image, your self thoughts (and there are a zillion effective ways to do that...ways that will appeal to and suit you), and if you do that I know beyond doubt that you will attract the friendships you deserve and desire. The snowball effect will still be there, but will work for you, not against you! And at the same time, one of your best, most awesome, trustworthy friends will be you.

[reflections]

Stick to your values mate, you'll begin to notice, then attract people who are also congruent with these values.

[Lychee]

Originally Posted by reflections

Stick to your values mate, you'll begin to notice, then attract people who are also congruent with these values.

You know what, you're absolutely right. I think that you should be very selective about the (true) friends you decide to keep with you. People who try to take advantage of you will be everywhere, and if they do, keep your faith in God and don't give up on trying to make friends. Once you start letting in people with values which run contradictory to your own, it leaves the door open for more people like that to come in. This may sway your own values and put you in an uncomfortable position. If something seems wrong to you, stay away from it. You become like the people you are around the most.

Stay true to your values, trust your intuition, and use your judgment based on your experience.