Anyone know anyone who went from low self esteem to high?

[ultimate]

I think I need to get mine up.

It probably varies from time to time.

[Clint Cora]

I might have had low self esteem during my childhood - definitely low self confidence for sure. Being small, unathletic, nerdy and Asian made my childhood pretty tough. But with the influence of the late, great Bruce Lee and my own entry into the world of martial arts, everything changed for me. Sometimes it takes that one hero in life to kick start things to drastically change us for the better.

[RonSouther]

I don't have any self image or self esteem. When I saw my true gifts and limits, I was done with creating an opinion of myself.

Now I just try to find ways to express myself through my talents and try not to exceed my limits.

I no longer judge me and saw that most everyone is confused like I was so my judgment for others became compassion.

[sharshar89]

I went from low to lower

[rawxstasy]

I've noticed my self esteem varies. In general, I've been able to bring my self esteem up much higher. I did this mainly by not comparing myself to other people anymore. Whenever I'd have a thought about so and so has more money is more beautiful etc. I'd just stop the thought and remind myself that I am unique and I just need to be myself. Eventually I stopped comparing myself and I feel a lot better about myself.

Listen to your self-talk. Many people tell themselves "you are so stupid, etc" this is often from "tapes" that are in the brain from our past. Life is tough enough, there's no need to beat yourself up. Meditation can help. Look at your accomplishments.

Hope those help.

[AngelPsychic444]

Originally Posted by ultimate

I think I need to get mine up.

It probably varies from time to time.

You received a lot of good advice in this thread. I'm always impressed by short answers, that people give to big questions, like the one you asked, especially when those short answers hit the nail on the head and really give you something valuable to work with.

Clint Cora, brought up a good point, of having a hero in your life or modeling yourself after your hero, this can be anyone by the way, either a real person, or even a fictitious character, the point being that you're aiming at "greatness" in your life, which in turn will get your self esteem up.

Another way of saying this, and I quote from the Conversation with God books, is something God said, "Don't be who you thought you were, BE who you wish you were".

This simple "being you who wish you were" can get you out of low self esteem really quick and maybe even change your whole life.

OK, so how does a person do this exactly? You choose someone you admire and then try to be like them a little at a time. Again, in the Conversation with God books, God say's to "go to the highest thought about yourself and then BE that".

I could do on and on, but really, let's keep it short. Don't complicate this whole thing, just do it for fun, this "being who you wish you were", play it as a game at first, and through your own experiences, you'll understand what I'm talking about.

This is just a quick and easy method, you don't have to follow my advice, there are other ways to get this done, and I hope you choose to have fun doing it!!

[billionairekid]

Originally Posted by ultimate

I think I need to get mine up.

It probably varies from time to time.

I'd ask if you understand the difference between self-esteem and self-confidence to make sure we're talking about the same thing. Self-esteem is simply having value because you're a living being. It's feeling wonderful because you are alive. Self-esteem develops very early in childhood through being held, loved and supported by your parents despite the fact you have no skills. And when I say skills I mean a baby cannot survive without parents. We need self-esteem to function.

Now lets talk about self-confidence which is different. Self-confidence is something you earn from doing things and learning skills. It is true some coaches and therapists can help you increase self-confidence but if you don't know what you're doing that can be disasterous. Again, self-confidence is earned.

So to summarize: self-esteem is a feeling of value you have from being. self-confidence is a feeling of value you have from doing. And many people get them confused.

[Star H]

Wow...some amazing advice on here guys....in fact this whole site is brilliant and so refreshingly true, aaaarrr at last

[quiethumir]

I've had low self-esteem most of my life, up until a year a go, when it started improving. I'm 24 now (so around 20 years of poor self esteem)

[sharshar89]

Originally Posted by quiethumir

I've had low self-esteem most of my life, up until a year a go, when it started improving. I'm 24 now (so around 20 years of poor self esteem)

What started your improvement?

[iDreamCatcher]

Originally Posted by ultimate

I think I need to get mine up.

It probably varies from time to time.

I think it's the same path that takes people from high self-esteem to low, but in reverse.
To drive yourself down you would repeatedly blame and crusify yourself mentally and otherwise make yourself feel emotionally miserable with outmost focusing and consistency.
So my guess to get to high self-esteem would be to repeatedly praise yourself and make yourself feel good about yourself. Again with outmost focusing and consistency.

Gleb

[The Cloud]

Rather than finding a way to change the way you think about yourself, just give up on thinking about yourself at all. Trying to think well of yourself is just a reaction to low self-esteem; you wouldn't have to bother if you didn't already think poorly of yourself. Instead of compensating for your mental issues, just give up on them. You don't need self-esteem, good or bad, or at least you don't need to work for it.

[RonSouther]

Originally Posted by The Cloud

Rather than finding a way to change the way you think about yourself, just give up on thinking about yourself at all. Trying to think well of yourself is just a reaction to low self-esteem; you wouldn't have to bother if you didn't already think poorly of yourself. Instead of compensating for your mental issues, just give up on them. You don't need self-esteem, good or bad, or at least you don't need to work for it.

+1....

When one truly accepts self, all this energy used for self-absorption is released as loving compassion.

High or low self esteem is a mind game....only self absorbed people play the game. But it's not possible to "decide" not to be self absorbed. The self absorption is a product of confusion and the healing is clarity.

It's the journey of all journey's from confusion to clarity. The confused mind is always thinking about the path out of confusion not realizing that thinking is the problem and acceptance is the solution.

[iDreamCatcher]

Originally Posted by RonSouther

... The confused mind is always thinking about the path out of confusion not realizing that thinking is the problem and acceptance is the solution.

Acceptance is not a solution, it's a consequence of a solution. Person with low self-esteem cannot make sudden jump from misery to acceptance. The gap is too big.
It's like staying on the shore and saying to the drowning man that he needs to realize that he is an infinite being and there is no death.

Gleb

[RonSouther]

Originally Posted by iDreamCatcher

Acceptance is not a solution, it's a consequence of a solution. Person with low self-esteem cannot make sudden jump from misery to acceptance. The gap is too big.
It's like staying on the shore and saying to the drowning man that he needs to realize that he is an infinite being and there is no death.

Gleb

Exactly, but the solution isn't to repeat affirmations to oneself to defeat the self loathing. The source of the confusion is in these habitual thoughts in the first place. New habitual thoughts isn't the answer.

It's to see that all of this is mental. The solution is beyond the mind. Almost everyone needs to hit rock bottom and to have a mentor that has already travelled the path. Master - disciple, but a true Master, not someone merely with a great idea.