|Emotional Mastery Emotional intelligence, addiction and recovery, grieving, loss, fear, anger, guilt, resentment, frustration, anxiety, depression, happiness, joy, love, kindness, forgiveness, self-acceptance, confidence, escaping the pit of despair, EFT|
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|12-01-2011, 06:50 PM||#1 (permalink)|
Join Date: Jan 2010
How to deflect negativity+protect myself from others
I literally drag myself down sometimes. Iv'e tested it, somedays, people say stuff to me that I always answer with a comeback, and other days that it gets to me. This happens when i let my guard down, like a new guy at job saying something like "you bastard" but with a smile, like trying to mess with me, it got to me and i was like "do you even know me?". I think the guy just wanted to play a little, but my inner self let that hurt me. The rest of the day was normal, i fooled around with the rest of the work group, didnt change anything. But, i cant protect myself for letting small stuff get to me.
|12-02-2011, 02:39 AM||#2 (permalink)|
Join Date: Aug 2011
Judging from what you've said in your post, it doesn't sound like you need to deflect negativity, it sounds like you might have some bottled up emotions or maybe some insecurities that you might need to face. It's hard to say without getting a more in-depth explanation of you and your situation.
You mentioned that the guy who said that to you was new, how do you normally respond to meeting new people? Are you normally defensive and aggressive? This is something that's pretty common at the workplace, people feel comfortable with the people who are there and when somebody new comes in there's a shift in the energy. Not only is this new person not tuned in with the overall vibes of the workplace, but you and your co-workers aren't tuned in with him. I've commonly seen people act quite aggressively to new people who are too eager to try and become accepted.
Just relax and take it easy. He's more than likely just trying to be friendly and is eager, though maybe a little too eager, to try and get to know his new co-workers. It really doesn't do any good to take anything defensively and beat yourself up over it.
This doesn't sound like a deeply complex issue that would be difficult to get over, it sounds to me like something that a simple shift of perspective and change of attitude can solve.
|12-04-2011, 10:03 AM||#5 (permalink)|
Join Date: Jan 2010
Hey guys. Well, not really.
For the past 6 years i've been, not anti-social, but, in jobs that would take hours of loneliness, so, its a new thing now, having a work group. I dont have any problem dealing with people, but i do have some past issues that marked me, and, as i read somehwere, i now have this feelings because of that and now my body makes me having these sensations as a protective system, but ultimately fails cause it makes me feel worse.
@ wanzulfikri In order for me to feel better, i have to "dark working". I did that yesterday, and it was normal. When i do that, i become more aware.
I feel like a loser when this happens.
I do have some past issues, like i mentioned. I'm 27 and they do still mess with me. I'm a pretty normal regular guy, but sometimes (99%) i remember thoese situations.
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