What does "OVERLY GRATEFUL" mean to you?

[DoggyLady]

i notice there are people who , when they thank people, the recipient cringe to hear it.

sometimes it's people who are not able to receive Thanks. Sometimes, perhaps, it's because the grateful person is "overly grateful" .

what do u think?

what is the right way to be grateful?

[paperorpipe]

I think this varies depending on a person and because we are dealing with people the "correct" answer that covers all cases isn't the answer you're looking for. When a person has a problem receiving gratitude it's generally because they are unaccustomed to receiving genuine gratitude. For example, the person may think most people are being thanked in a sarcastic manner. But for typical interactions, overly grateful would be gratitude that goes above and beyond what a person views to be an appropriate response given the action. For example, if you hold the door open for me then an appropriate response given our social system would be a quick "thank you" and that's it. Now if I started kissing your feet because you held the door open for me as a sign of thanks that would bit unusual and I'd imagine most would agree. I think that the best way to know the proper way to express gratitude is to receive it. Do something benevolent which would warrant gratuity by someone else, look at how they respond, then repeat until you detect an observable pattern.

[RonSouther]

I think most people are so wrapped up in the ego personality that when a sincere "thank you" comes to them, they would have to drop the hard shell to say "your welcome" in a way that reflects their heart.

[taylor]

Originally Posted by RonSouther

I think most people are so wrapped up in the ego personality that when a sincere "thank you" comes to them, they would have to drop the hard shell to say "your welcome" in a way that reflects their heart.

I agree Ron. Cynicism makes sincere gratitude look fake, cheesy or over the top. Or it can come from the repression of expressions of love in public, so that when it is done by the other person it's embarrassing.

[CoolBee]

Totally depends on the people involved.

If someone says a sincere 'thank you' to me once, no matter how 'big' the thing I did is, then that's totally fine with me and I do start to feel embarrassed if it gets said more than a handful of times.

Sadly, I know from bitter experience that not everyone is the same and some people refuse anyway for you to say thanks, and anyway to 'discharge the debt of gratitude', expecting your undying loyalty henceforth yea even unto the ends of time.

Same with a sincere 'sorry'.

[Maguru]

Originally Posted by paperorpipe

I think this varies depending on a person and because we are dealing with people the "correct" answer that covers all cases isn't the answer you're looking for. When a person has a problem receiving gratitude it's generally because they are unaccustomed to receiving genuine gratitude. For example, the person may think most people are being thanked in a sarcastic manner. But for typical interactions, overly grateful would be gratitude that goes above and beyond what a person views to be an appropriate response given the action. For example, if you hold the door open for me then an appropriate response given our social system would be a quick "thank you" and that's it. Now if I started kissing your feet because you held the door open for me as a sign of thanks that would bit unusual and I'd imagine most would agree. I think that the best way to know the proper way to express gratitude is to receive it. Do something benevolent which would warrant gratuity by someone else, look at how they respond, then repeat until you detect an observable pattern.

Yes, I think appropriate response whether you are the giver or the receiver.