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Emotional Mastery Emotional intelligence, addiction and recovery, grieving, loss, fear, anger, guilt, resentment, frustration, anxiety, depression, happiness, joy, love, kindness, forgiveness, self-acceptance, confidence, escaping the pit of despair, EFT

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Old 11-03-2011, 12:58 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Im not really to sure what I need, but maybe if I share where Im coming from someone could offer me some advice.

I have lived a completely different life before the one Im living now. I decided about 4 years ago to change up my life. Things were not working and I was very unhappy. My mom passed away and I didn't want to sacrifice my whole life just to make others happy like she did, so, I ended my marriage, and started school (something I had wanted to do from high school, but ended up deciding to get married instead). So now I'm 38, a single mother of 4 with almost no support and struggling in college. I just found out today that I failed my midterm. All I can hear in my head now are all the negative comments I've heard over the last 4 years about how I'm making a mistake... Ill never be able to do it having school aged children, how Ill never find love again, etc... I do believe I'm on the path I'm meant to be on, so why am I struggling with horrible self defeating thoughts? Can I turn it around?
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Old 11-03-2011, 09:08 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ckak View Post
Im not really to sure what I need, but maybe if I share where Im coming from someone could offer me some advice.

I have lived a completely different life before the one Im living now. I decided about 4 years ago to change up my life. Things were not working and I was very unhappy. My mom passed away and I didn't want to sacrifice my whole life just to make others happy like she did, so, I ended my marriage, and started school (something I had wanted to do from high school, but ended up deciding to get married instead). So now I'm 38, a single mother of 4 with almost no support and struggling in college. I just found out today that I failed my midterm. All I can hear in my head now are all the negative comments I've heard over the last 4 years about how I'm making a mistake... Ill never be able to do it having school aged children, how Ill never find love again, etc... I do believe I'm on the path I'm meant to be on, so why am I struggling with horrible self defeating thoughts? Can I turn it around?
The greatest love you can find in the world is love for yourself (self knowing, self acceptance, not narcissism).

The voices in your head belong to the critics that you didn't obey....YOUR voice is the one that took responsibility for your life and for the consequences of your mistakes (which are stepping stones to grow, not condemnations of your being). Your voice is the one that feels you're on the right path.

The voices you hear that belong to your critics are the voices of people that aren't living your life nor taking responsibility for your life.

I applaud you for taking the freedom to find your own path AND for taking the responsibility for ups and downs along the way!

Every generation is taught to sacrifice for others....okay, all of us are sacrificing...who among us is enjoying the sacrifice of others? How can we? We are too busy sacrificing too! "Sacrifice" is a guilt trip. Where in nature do you see "sacrifice"? I don't. I see abundance!

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Old 11-04-2011, 12:40 AM   #3 (permalink)
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i couldn't agree more with RS above. be kind to yourself right now. beware of abandoning yourself and your dreams. be encouraging and supportive to yourself as you would your best friend. take your studies slowly. if you have to repeat a subject it's not the end of the world. there'll be another opportunity down the track. if you're following your truth, your bliss, your vision and dreams, somehow it will all work out in the end. watch or re-watch steve jobs's speech to graduates about living their life, not someone else's. get some books or read some online articles about people who have struggled through the difficult times but persisted and overcome. do whatever it takes to love and support yourself at this time. you have everyone here's best wishes and loving thoughts. xx
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Old 11-04-2011, 12:45 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Hold up.. you're a single mother of four and you're managing to make it to school??
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Old 11-04-2011, 05:37 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ckak View Post
Im not really to sure what I need, but maybe if I share where Im coming from someone could offer me some advice.

I have lived a completely different life before the one Im living now. I decided about 4 years ago to change up my life. Things were not working and I was very unhappy. My mom passed away and I didn't want to sacrifice my whole life just to make others happy like she did, so, I ended my marriage, and started school (something I had wanted to do from high school, but ended up deciding to get married instead). So now I'm 38, a single mother of 4 with almost no support and struggling in college. I just found out today that I failed my midterm. All I can hear in my head now are all the negative comments I've heard over the last 4 years about how I'm making a mistake... Ill never be able to do it having school aged children, how Ill never find love again, etc... I do believe I'm on the path I'm meant to be on, so why am I struggling with horrible self defeating thoughts? Can I turn it around?


oh boy those self defeating thoughts !

hug yourself right now because you need it !

I don't know why some of us do this to ourselves
but can you imagine how powerful you would be without those thoughts ?

yes you would be powerful
and full of energy
and you would know
that you could accomplish
what is in your heart

it takes practice -daily practice
watch some of these videos Eckhart Tolle on Being Yourself - YouTube
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Old 11-04-2011, 10:56 AM   #6 (permalink)
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When we get down-hearted and seem to struggle a lot, we want to keep kicking ourselves just so we can add to our misery...."wanna whine? *kick* there I'll give you something to whine about"..lol. Weird creatures we are!

Try focusing on all your great achievements...such as...raising 4 as a single mum//managing school on top of this//being a great mum no matter what//loving yourself enough to take on the challenges of life-changes.
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Old 11-04-2011, 02:42 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Wow! thank you guys... I really needed to hear words of encouragement! I can do this... Some days are harder than other though
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