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| Emotional Mastery Emotional intelligence, addiction and recovery, grieving, loss, fear, anger, guilt, resentment, frustration, anxiety, depression, happiness, joy, love, kindness, forgiveness, self-acceptance, confidence, escaping the pit of despair, EFT |
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10-07-2011, 11:19 AM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Junior Member Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 4
 |  hi everyone
i am new here but i feel like a total failure, i failed my last exam that will enable me to graduate. this was my last chance and i really studied had sleepless nights but in the end i panic and i failed. i feel empty, let people down and myself. i was hoping to finish get a job and im not young anymore im 36years old. is it over for me? im a positive person but, this one just beats me. would love your help emotionally. |
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10-07-2011, 11:59 AM
| #2 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,433
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If you experience an uncomfortable emotion, it is because something inside you is not agreeing with your own beliefs. Imagine that you say to yourself "I am a total failure!" and that every aspect of your being all agreed and loved this idea, with no resistance at all. Then there would be no discomfort. You could just skip around all day loving your failureness. You could say "I feel empty! I let people down! I am a disappointment to all of us!" and there would be no cause for concern. It is not these thoughts that create the painful emotion, it's your resistance to them. The general strategy 99% of people take is how do I eliminate the thought that I am resisting. This does work to an extent, because it puts the boogey man back in the closet. But of course we all recognize that the boogey man likes to go for a strole from time to time, and sometimes he's a real rascal about going back in the closet. It can be sooooo annoying. The only path I know that leads to real freedom from the boogey man is to get to know him. To actually consider what terrifies you and accept it as if it really might be true. So what if you are a failure? So what if everyone is disappointed in you? So what if you're now 36 and all chances of ever becoming something are just falling out of reach? Imagine that this is all really really true. The worst that you feared has now come to pass. What happens? You don't disappear. Reality doesn't fall apart. It's still just you sitting in the same chair. There actually is no threat at all. None of these thoughts really has the power to knock you off your chair, but it takes a lot of courage to face these fears and accept them. We resist them because we feel that to accept them is limiting, but actually the opposite is true. Once we have accepted the thing we fear most, as if it were true, we discover it isn't. There is nothing left to fight. If any disturbing thought is accepted completely, it has no more ammo left. It then can be seen through as just a thought. If there is still something to fear, then realize that the boogey man still has something to threaten you with. Of course all his bullets are blanks, but until you really face the worst as if it were true, and recognize for yourself that nothing happens, you actually will believe the boogey man is dangerous. People often spend a lifetime building a fortress to protect themselves from the boogey woman, but she really is no more dangerous than a child with a squirt gun. Last edited by AaronB; 10-07-2011 at 12:02 PM. |
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Hello There!
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10-08-2011, 02:09 AM
| #5 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 98
| Contact your professor and explain to them the situation with sincerity of heart! I mean that. Last semester I literally missed my exam and after pouring out my soul in tears I heard the words, "Contact again" and I emailed my professor and she let me take the exam. Seriously, if you want to graduate, you can. If you really want to graduate you most definitely can. BUt you have to want it and not give up hope. It's never too late to pursue your dream. My mom's 46 and she's still in college getting her associates. |
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10-08-2011, 10:32 AM
| #6 (permalink) | |
| Junior Member Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 18
| Quote:
I was in the same situation as you, though I'm only 17 years old. I've experienced failure countless times, I already wrote two topics in search for guidance and comfort. You should talk to your teacher, even in an informal way. They are human beings after all. Don't isolate yourself, take action immediately, don't think about what made you fail, think about how you can get back up. Studying is not enough, the mental state of a person determines success as well. My advice would be to start consulting a psychologist (Your University probably has one), solve your emotional quarries, I think they're blocking you the same way they've blocked me in the past. Good luck, we're here for you, we care about you.  | |
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10-08-2011, 01:13 PM
| #7 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Mississauga, On Canada
Posts: 1,502
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It's only over if YOU say it's over. If you had the opportunity to retake the course again, would you? What would you advise to others if they failed exams? Would you tell them to quit? If you are determined to stay in the course of study, then retake the course and study better next time. You have to ask yourself how bad do you want the degree/diploma? Will you regret in the future if you don't try to retake the final course again? Your answers should tell you what your actions should be. Good luck. |
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10-08-2011, 05:50 PM
| #8 (permalink) |
| Junior Member Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: India
Posts: 1
| :)
hello friends, I witnessed couple of audios and now i am quite excited about What's next now. I was browsing google since a week in search of various personality development courses but i think this one is much wider platform to practise personality traits. Hoping i could learn if got support of this stevepavlinians... |
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