experiencing repressed emotion

[rei]

What are some ways you have discovered to do this?

[VinceG]

I'm not sure what you're asking for here? Do you know what the repressed emotions are? Or are you just looking around for stuff that may be repressed?

[rei]

Anger, specifically. I know I have some in there somewhere, and I want to access it but I've trained myself to keep it holed up somewhere inside. I've found some mental dialogue stuff to touch on it, but I want to go deeper, and must somehow convince my inner self that yes, I really mean it is okay to show it to me, and yes I really do want to face the consequences involved in admitting it is there.

I'd say it's a mixture of suppression and repression.

[VinceG]

Originally Posted by rei

Anger, specifically. I know I have some in there somewhere, and I want to access it but I've trained myself to keep it holed up somewhere inside. I've found some mental dialogue stuff to touch on it, but I want to go deeper, and must somehow convince my inner self that yes, I really mean it is okay to show it to me, and yes I really do want to face the consequences involved in admitting it is there.

I'd say it's a mixture of suppression and repression.

Ahh. Anger is triggered, you're not going to be able to feel it until you find the trigger. The trigger might be thoughts about your dad, or a "pet peeve." People think there's some kind of deep, repressed anger somewhere lying around, but they don't. It's just a series of triggers that set a person off. If there aren't any triggers left, then all you're doing by coaxing out a feeling of anger is creating anger where none existed before.

You have to be angry about something, find that something, and you've got your anger.

[James81]

Challenge yourself to do something that you aren't sure you can do. Something that is risky and way beyond your comfort zone.

That's what is working for me. I'm having all sorts of insights and emotions come up by doing that.

[st33med]

Originally Posted by rei

Anger, specifically. I know I have some in there somewhere, and I want to access it but I've trained myself to keep it holed up somewhere inside. I've found some mental dialogue stuff to touch on it, but I want to go deeper, and must somehow convince my inner self that yes, I really mean it is okay to show it to me, and yes I really do want to face the consequences involved in admitting it is there.

I'd say it's a mixture of suppression and repression.

Just ask and allow yourself to express it. Give it time and don't force it, else it will go back to being buried and take more time. Once you do express it, ask what message there is behind this unwanted anger.

[rei]

Originally Posted by VinceG

Ahh. Anger is triggered, you're not going to be able to feel it until you find the trigger. The trigger might be thoughts about your dad, or a "pet peeve." People think there's some kind of deep, repressed anger somewhere lying around, but they don't. It's just a series of triggers that set a person off. If there aren't any triggers left, then all you're doing by coaxing out a feeling of anger is creating anger where none existed before.

You have to be angry about something, find that something, and you've got your anger.

Heh. I was creating an opportunity to experience the truth of your post just before I read your post.

In other words, I just got pissed at someone, and I know what triggered it. I think I can build on that in some way, maybe imagine the times that same theme happened or something.

I don't know if I agree about the notion that people don't have unresolved anger. I think sometimes we do. I think a slightly angry or unapproachable expression, if you're not making yourself look that way, can mean unresolved anger.

[rei]

Originally Posted by James81

Challenge yourself to do something that you aren't sure you can do. Something that is risky and way beyond your comfort zone.

That's what is working for me. I'm having all sorts of insights and emotions come up by doing that.

Man, you're not kidding I'm going through something similar right now, way outside my comfort zone, facing some really icky stuff in multiple areas of my life, no idea if I can accomplish the underlying goal, learning where I need to develop more skills.

[rei]

Originally Posted by st33med

Just ask and allow yourself to express it. Give it time and don't force it, else it will go back to being buried and take more time. Once you do express it, ask what message there is behind this unwanted anger.

Thanks Andrew This is a good point also, getting the message.

[VinceG]

Originally Posted by rei

In other words, I just got pissed at someone, and I know what triggered it. I think I can build on that in some way, maybe imagine the times that same theme happened or something.

Yeah, what you're looking for here is dualities. You get angry when your subconscious wants something to be so but the world isn't playing ball. I get mad when machines don't work the way I think they should. I don't get angry at people because my subconscious doesn't need people to act in a certain way. But I want machines to act in a logical, understandable fashion. And because I've been working with machines all my life, I think I should be able to know how they work, when every machine works a little differently. So I get angry whenever my mind thinks it understands a machine, but really doesn't.

I don't know if I agree about the notion that people don't have unresolved anger. I think sometimes we do. I think a slightly angry or unapproachable expression, if you're not making yourself look that way, can mean unresolved anger.

I didn't say people don't have unresolved anger. Of course they do. It's just that the anger responds to a trigger. If the trigger doesn't exist, then the anger doesn't either. The fact that there is a trigger means that the anger is unresolved. If you thought you had all kinds of repressed anger boiling underneath the surface, but it never ever ever surfaced, then that something underneath might be really powerful and intense, but it's not anger and shouldn't be treated as such.

[Dulma]

What prompted you to repress the anger in the first place? If the repressed anger is still there, then doesn't that mean the tendency to repress is still there also? Maybe explore the reasons you felt/feel that anger shouldn't be expressed, should be held back, etc. And then work through those.

[mattncfd]

In addition to what everyone's saying here, there are actually plenty of different practices you can undertake to engage your anger proactively.

I've found breathwork to work in helping me contact emotions I didn't know I had.

Meditation is another great practice for discovering more about your repressed emotional shadows...the 10-day vipassana retreats offered all over the world by dhamma.org helped me a ton.

When all else fails, get in a relationship! My God, nothing dredges up my repressed emotions like my girlfriend. Here I was thinking I was all calm and centered, and my girlfriend can press my buttons and set me off with unbelievable skill and ease. I'm trying to embrace the conscious-awakening process of relationship instead of just re-repressing all the emotions that come up for me...it's tough work, but in my experience relationship is the best thing for dredging up our repressed "stuff."

Good luck!

[elucidate]

Yeah, I was thinking last night about you and your issue rei. You could try creating an anger mask. I made one after reading a book on inner child recovery by Lucia Cappacione. It's quite effective actually for invoking your anger. You could try incorproating this with some form of dance. In this way you are setting the intention to make contact with that part of you which you hold back.

I'm not sure if you have heard of it before or if there is one near you, but I go to this dance every so often that is held in a church. It's called The Five Rythmns and it was started by a woman named Gabriel Roth. It's an international thing, so there are dances all over the world. Google it and see if there is one near you because I HIGHLY recommend everyone go.

I have turned a few friends onto it now and they are addicted, like everyone else who goes there.