Need help: Can't get past feelings of deep reqret

[Bluerose224]

Thank you in advance to everyone who reads my posts and to those who may respond.

I recently attempted an IM which I describe in this post:
Question about manifesting a physical relationship

I stopped the IM when a kind person pointed out that what I was doing was possibly violating another person's free will.

Stopping the IM however didn't keep me from thinking a lot about the amazing parts of it that did work great and the parts that did work but that I completely flubbed. I don't know why, and it isn't very LOA of me, but I can't seem to get past my 'mistakes' to the point where it is greatly affecting my life.

Two of my now major regrets are:

1. The universe came into complete alignment in one instance with this person. I mean time stopped. I don't think I've ever experienced anything like it and I feel now that I never will again. I didn't realize it at the time but that was the moment to act. I just stood there like an idiot in shock and let the moment pass.

If only I would have seen The Secret DVD sooner with the beach scene I would have known what to do. I very nearly did but my library's copy was lost at the time. I could have visited another town and checked out a copy there or ordered it from Amazon...even their super-saver shipping arrives in about two days. Woulda, coulda, shoulda, if if if...I'm killing myself thinking about this missed opportunity and I can't seem to shake it.

2. An alpha reflection occurred which I interpreted incorrectly. A wind-up wall clock which hadn't worked in 2-3 months suddenly, seemingly on its own, started working on a day that the person happened to visit. I interpreted this to mean that it was going to take time (the lull), but I now know it meant that time was running out...

I say running out because within a few weeks the person I desired was, I believe, in another relationship. I haven't asked but he looks completely different: happier, more confident, bigger...

I believe my IM manifested him into a relationship.

Why can't I simply be happy for him and happy for everything that I learned in my first IM? It's killing me to be stuck in this mode of deep regret and over analyzing. It's probably killing other LOA benefits I might receive which can help.

I'm putting this message out in part because in my previous post I mentioned a problem I was having at the time...that of an over-active sex drive. Well, after I posted that message the problem disappeared. I took that to mean I just needed to ask the universe for help with it. However, I have been asking for healing in this case and I'm still hurting a lot. I literally can barely even eat.

I believe that one answer may lie in VinceG's series on blocks. However they are very long and I'm in a state that I'm having trouble understanding the words beyond a few paragraphs. I will try again at different times.

If anyone has any suggestions or links to related posts please kindly reply.

[AaronB]

Are you looking for practices or techniques that will bring you a relationship? Or are you looking for how to find perfect peace with yourself regardless of your relationship status?

[Bluerose224]

Aaron,

A big thank you for your reply. I know I haven't replied until now but I saw your message almost immediately. It made me think, "What is it that I do want?"

I thought about it for quite some time.

I'm still deciding on the answer but the important thing is I started asking (via LOA) for the future that I want rather than regretting the past. It has helped immensely and my pain is greatly diminished.

For an update on my approach since this posting please see this post:
An update - still dealing with stuff.

I welcome any thoughts at any time.

[AaronB]

What is your favorite part about the relationship you seek? Imagine feeling safe, feeling warm, feeling connected, feeling loved, feeling everything that this relationship will bring you. When you can describe in detail how beautiful life would be if you had the relationship you are looking for and to describe it feels really energizing to you, then you are drawing it to you. When it seems so beautiful you want to cry, you're drawing it to you like a rocket.

Spend at least as much time excited by what you want as you do feeling disturbed about not having it. It's so easy to do. Just think about the details. Think about all the ways you would feel so wonderful if this were the case right now, and then just bask in that feeling for a while.