What is wrong with sorrow?

[Logicseeker]

The positive psychology movement wants you to stop listen to "dark music", stop crying, stop being with negative people and so on. I don't agree with this and I think that it goes against intuition. Sorrow is beautiful. It's much easier producing a sad beautiful song coompared to producing a joyful beautiful song.

There is power in sorrow and it can be developing. I wouldn't have been the same person I am today if it hadn't been for those dark moments. And much of the insight I've gained during the years came from a "dark" source. So much can be found and discovered and if you don't drown yourself in it you'll find that poets, writers, artists etc. They've all used sorrow as something to explore.

Thus, I do not share the common opinion that you would want to feel happy all the time. This would be denying yourself and you would miss a part of life. In sorrow, paradoxically, you can even find joy. It gives you another dimension in life. Just think how much more "flat" everything would look if shadows did not exist.

I wonder what your thoughts on this is and I would love to see exactly that YOUR THOUGHTS and not just a reference to Pavlina's article on darkworkers (why not switch work from time to time)...

[Greek Dog]

Sorrow is definitely part of life but dwelling in sorrow is one of many ways that we remain is lower energy levels. You may if you want to and you make good points about benefits but the great benefits of functioning on higher energy levels outweigh those from lingering or malingering on lower frequencies. Hey - but feel free to hang out where ever you feel most confortable.

[RT Wolf]

What feels better? Joy or sorrow?

I think you're underweighting that personal experience of either joy or sorrow in your assesment of whether sorrow is good or bad.

I've lived through a time when I've been sorrowful and I've lived through times when I have been amazingly happy. I choose happiness.

Animals and humans share a trait, we both tend to want to reduce pain (or discomfort) and increase pleasure (or joy). However, man is the only creature that can rationalize away that impluse of increasing joy, which I find amusing because I did the same thing about a year ago. The world becomes too rational, too "modernist" which eventually lead to a more post-modern interpretation of things as a backlash against the "dehumanization" of the modernist movement.

[Lychee]

Sorrow is beautiful and necessary. Pain and sadness can teach a person many things. But living in a constant state of sadness and depression is not healthy. Happiness does feel better, but having the opposite emotion of sorrow keeps us in balance.

[Mark Lapierre]

Originally Posted by Logicseeker

The positive psychology movement wants you to stop listen to "dark music", stop crying, stop being with negative people and so on. I don't agree with this and I think that it goes against intuition.

I'd say I'd buy into the positive psychology movement, but I don't think people should stop listening to dark music, or stop crying, or completely cut negative people out of their lives instantly.

If you enjoy listening to dark music, and it doesn't fill you will negative emotions, then I don't consider it a bad influence.

If you feel like crying, cry. But if all you do is think about the negative sides of whatever made you cry, and perpetuate the sorrowful emotions without any attempt at ending them, then you're hurting yourself.

Only if a negative person always tried to make me feel negative too, would I stop being their friend. But if I could lead them to joy, then I would.

None of that means either embracing or running from sorrow.

Originally Posted by Logicseeker

Sorrow is beautiful. It's much easier producing a sad beautiful song coompared to producing a joyful beautiful song.

I would consider a joyful beautiful song to be better than a sad beautiful song because joy feels good, sorrow doesn't. Also, being easier doesn't make it any more worthwhile.

Originally Posted by Logicseeker

Thus, I do not share the common opinion that you would want to feel happy all the time. This would be denying yourself and you would miss a part of life. In sorrow, paradoxically, you can even find joy. It gives you another dimension in life. Just think how much more "flat" everything would look if shadows did not exist.

If you find joy through sorrow, then it's no longer sorrow.

If I'm truly happy then it doesn't matter if I miss out on part of life, I'm happy anyway. Why choose to experience something painful? I don't enjoy feeling sorrowful therefore I'll choose joy over sadness every time. And when I don't get a choice? Well, I try to accept the situation as it is, accept my sorrow, and then let it go.