The hardest thing for me is understanding my emotions

[ellie]

I wasn't sure what area to put this in LOA or emotional mastery, somehow I think the two go together


The last few days I have been going through an internal battle about what is the right decision, my thoughts went from highs to lows, lows to high, from yes to no, to no to yes.

The thing is I didn't really come away with knowing in my heart what the absolute right answer was. My mind was certainly confused and I even though I was trying to understand my mind and what it was doing I could not decipher the "real code".

So how do you do it? Decipher the right answer? How does one get a clear and definitive answer for what is best for them?

I found the process in itself rather confusing, the inner battles, which neither felt right or wrong.

I know this sounds rather cryptic, but do we always get in our mind the right answer, but we decide to block the truth?

[wolfgang]

We never make our own decisions. All the deciding we try to do is when the answer is not there yet. When the decision arrives, we step into it and know it's the path for us.

[AdamA]

Originally Posted by ellie

So how do you do it? Decipher the right answer? How does one get a clear and definitive answer for what is best for them?

Whenever I get stuck like this I just try something, anything. If I can't choose between 2 decisions, I just pick one and see what happens. Then I use the feedback to gain greater clarity.

[Isaac Ben]

Originally Posted by ellie

So how do you do it? Decipher the right answer? How does one get a clear and definitive answer for what is best for them?

Most of the time you just have to give the first step. It doesn't matter you are not sure if you are making a good decision or not.

Take action, try something. If it doesn't work, you will move a little to the right, or to the left, and eventually find a way.

This happens a lot to me. I try not to spend that much time thinking, and take action. Once I give the first step, it is easier to go on.

[Cado]

I've got two things I'd recommend in times like that: Collage to Your Center and The Foci Exercise. They'll get you to the root of emotional issues no problem.

[Vibration]

Originally Posted by ellie

I wasn't sure what area to put this in LOA or emotional mastery, somehow I think the two go together

The last few days I have been going through an internal battle about what is the right decision, my thoughts went from highs to lows, lows to high, from yes to no, to no to yes.

The thing is I didn't really come away with knowing in my heart what the absolute right answer was. My mind was certainly confused and I even though I was trying to understand my mind and what it was doing I could not decipher the "real code".

So how do you do it? Decipher the right answer? How does one get a clear and definitive answer for what is best for them?

I found the process in itself rather confusing, the inner battles, which neither felt right or wrong.

I know this sounds rather cryptic, but do we always get in our mind the right answer, but we decide to block the truth?

It sounds to me that you are assuming there is always a right answer. There isn't. There is only choices and the consequences of chioces, per choice. You have power over your choices, but you don't usually have power over the consequences of your choices.

Think about it this way. If every choice had only one right answer, that would make every other answer wrong. Eventually everyone would get smart about this, and start choosing only the right choice each time they had to make a decision; after all, who doesn't want to make the "right choice?"

What if everyone suddenly started making the right choice every time?

That would mean that everyone would choose the same things every time. There would be absolutely no variation in people's actions. This would lock everyone into only one way of doing everything, one way of living, one way of thinking, and this would be bad! This would turn humans into something like "The Borg" from Star Trek. But fortunately the universe is organized in a way that prevents this: there are no (or very, very few) absolutes, therefore no absolutely "right choices."

The best way to get what you want is to: Decide what it is that you want to happen. Then work backwards from there. What needs to happen to make your desire a reality? Of those things that need to happen, which ones can you control to some degree? Which ones can someone else control? Which ones are out of anyone's control?

Calculate what you can choose to do, or what you can get someone else to choose to do, that will produce the necessary consequences to cause what you what to happen.

There is no magic to LOA. When you practice LOA, you are simply programming yourself and others to automatically make choices that harmonize with achieving the end result you want. You're turning the process I outlined above, from a conscious, manual activity to a more unconscious, automated one, through self-programming.

When you begin suffering from confusion like you described, it usually means you are making a false assumption somewhere, or basing your thinking on something that is inaccurate. The result is that it doesn't compute, and you experience confusion.

[ellie]

Hmm all good points. You know I was beginning to think there was always a right and wrong answer. When I answer things that are more honest and in-tune with who I am, things usually turn out for the good, but when I do something that does not feel right but I go against it, it turns out bad.

But the conflict recently was a bit different, there was no right or wrong that I could clearly see. I was going through an internal battle to understand why it wasn't so clearly evident and thought my mind was playing tricks on me.

I don't know... this really wasn't about taking first steps. With me, I know what I was going through was a bit different. I know it was more to do with understanding if what I was choosing was what I really wanted to do, or was I just trying to please others, but I couldn't quite see the clear line this time.

[ellie]

Originally Posted by Illustro Cado

I've got two things I'd recommend in times like that: Collage to Your Center and The Foci Exercise. They'll get you to the root of emotional issues no problem.

But I'm not a darkworker but these exercises do look good. Nice articles

[wolfgang]

Originally Posted by Vibration

It sounds to me that you are assuming there is always a right answer. There isn't. There is only choices and the consequences of chioces, per choice. You have power over your choices, but you don't usually have power over the consequences of your choices.

Think about it this way. If every choice had only one right answer, that would make every other answer wrong. Eventually everyone would get smart about this, and start choosing only the right choice each time they had to make a decision; after all, who doesn't want to make the "right choice?"

what if whatever choice one ends up taking is the right choice - even if later in hind sight it doesn't seem that way? that the choice that gets made is the path that lead one to what they need no matter what. in that making a "bad" choice is to expose you to a learning experience or just an experience.

What if everyone suddenly started making the right choice every time?

That would mean that everyone would choose the same things every time. There would be absolutely no variation in people's actions. This would lock everyone into only one way of doing everything, one way of living, one way of thinking, and this would be bad!

everyone already makes the right choice or best choice they can at the time they make it. there is lots of variation going on all the time with what people choose.

This would turn humans into something like "The Borg" from Star Trek. But fortunately the universe is organized in a way that prevents this: there are no (or very, very few) absolutes, therefore no absolutely "right choices."

if there are no "right choices", then why go about speculating what it means if everyone started making the "right choice" all the time?

The best way to get what you want is to: Decide what it is that you want to happen. Then work backwards from there. What needs to happen to make your desire a reality? Of those things that need to happen, which ones can you control to some degree? Which ones can someone else control? Which ones are out of anyone's control?

Calculate what you can choose to do, or what you can get someone else to choose to do, that will produce the necessary consequences to cause what you what to happen.

you can never get someone else to choose.

There is no magic to LOA. When you practice LOA, you are simply programming yourself and others to automatically make choices that harmonize with achieving the end result you want.

you can not program others!

[Karanime]

Whatever you choose is the right choice, otherwise you wouldn't have chosen it.

Whatever happens after is another step towards what you want, otherwise it wouldn't happen.

/<3

[Vibration]

Originally Posted by wolfgang

what if whatever choice one ends up taking is the right choice - even if later in hind sight it doesn't seem that way? that the choice that gets made is the path that lead one to what they need no matter what. in that making a "bad" choice is to expose you to a learning experience or just an experience.

That's my point. If you determine that a particular choice is "The Right Choice" at the time you make it, that same choice can end up being "The Wrong Choice" later on, and vice versa. Does that mean that the right choice transmuted into the wrong choice later in time?

No.

"Right" and "Wrong" were just labels that you used to distinguish between two choices at the time, but nither was absolutely right or absolutely wrong. Who decides what is absolutely right and wrong. Right for who?

I might think that choosing to kill a pig so I can eat bacon is a right choice because I love bacon, but that choice might be very wrong to the the pig. An absolutely right choice will be right for both of us. Who decides which is right and wrong? Me? The pig? Or a third, independent person? Who is that person? What criteria makes an independent party qualified to decide what is absolutely right and wrong?

Originally Posted by wolfgang

everyone already makes the right choice or best choice they can at the time they make it. there is lots of variation going on all the time with what people choose.

If you wish call the choice one makes at some particular time "The Right Choice" that's fine. You can call it anything you like, but a choice isn't going to turn into "Absolutely Right" just because you call it that. It is what it is, nothing more and nothing less. Its consequences will fall where they fall, and hopefully where they fall will be good for us. But if not, you can always find the good in whatever happens, some way in which you can benefit.

Originally Posted by wolfgang

if there are no "right choices", then why go about speculating what it means if everyone started making the "right choice" all the time?

To point out the falacy in that.

Originally Posted by wolfgang

you can never get someone else to choose.

People in Sales do it all the time. How else can they convince someone to buy the life insurance, or whatever else s/he is selling? True, they can't force another to make a decision, but they can certainly influence it.

Originally Posted by wolfgang

you can not program others!

This is what drug cartells do to their customers, in order to keep demand up for their products, and the money flowing.

This is what softdrink manufacturs do when they add extra caffine to their products, for the same reason.

This is what casinos are doing when they pump oxygen into gambeling rooms to make customers feel alert so they don't get tired before they've spent their money, or when they pump in incence to make the place smell like money.

This is what television adds are attempting to do, primarily to children, to make them want the toys, the cerial, etc.

This is why they include cute jingles and songs in the adds, because they tend to stick in your head better, and why they use cute animals like geccos and talking turtles and such.

If this is not programming, then what is it? Because unfortunately, it sure is working for a lot of people in advertising.

True, you can choose not to be programmed, but only if you're conscious of the attempt.

[Plays With Life]

Right for what purpose? Think about possible actions in relation to a purpose, and I think it will become more clear whether the action is right or wrong for that purpose.

[wolfgang]

Originally Posted by Vibration

That's my point. If you determine that a particular choice is "The Right Choice" at the time you make it, that same choice can end up being "The Wrong Choice" later on, and vice versa. Does that mean that the right choice transmuted into the wrong choice later in time?

No.

"Right" and "Wrong" were just labels that you used to distinguish between two choices at the time, but nither was absolutely right or absolutely wrong. Who decides what is absolutely right and wrong. Right for who?

no - the choice is always right, to me. choice is never wrong. what then happens is we judge the results of a choice later, but at the time the choice is exactly what was possible and the unfolding path for that person.

I might think that choosing to kill a pig so I can eat bacon is a right choice because I love bacon, but that choice might be very wrong to the the pig. An absolutely right choice will be right for both of us. Who decides which is right and wrong? Me? The pig? Or a third, independent person? Who is that person? What criteria makes an independent party qualified to decide what is absolutely right and wrong?

native american indians believed when they took an animal, the animal was pre arranged to be giving up it's life. what happens is what is needed or divinely arranged to occur in the synchronicity of ONEness.

If you wish call the choice one makes at some particular time "The Right Choice" that's fine.

any choice is the best choice and the only choice, it is right in that context. there is no way to make a bad or good choice, the choice is given in a way by all the persons make up and ability to respond in their way to what's going on.

You can call it anything you like, but a choice isn't going to turn into "Absolutely Right" just because you call it that. It is what it is, nothing more and nothing less.

anything, to me, that is nothing more nothing less is perfections and absolutely right in that context.

Its consequences will fall where they fall, and hopefully where they fall will be good for us. But if not, you can always find the good in whatever happens, some way in which you can benefit.

it's all judgment of experience, choice has little to do with that. you can end up choosing something that you later judge as not good for you - but that is not because of the choice but because you've judged it as not good.

People in Sales do it all the time. How else can they convince someone to buy the life insurance, or whatever else s/he is selling? True, they can't force another to make a decision, but they can certainly influence it.

very well true. I however was replying in the context of people using LoA to influence others and trying to program them. It is not the way to go for personal development or spirituality, imho. Just work on yourself and others will change in refection to you, not you trying to control others. I wouldn't recommend people try to influence others and control them with the LoA ideas.

This is what drug cartells do to their customers, in order to keep demand up for their products, and the money flowing.

This is what softdrink manufacturs do when they add extra caffine to their products, for the same reason.

This is what casinos are doing when they pump oxygen into gambeling rooms to make customers feel alert so they don't get tired before they've spent their money, or when they pump in incence to make the place smell like money.

This is what television adds are attempting to do, primarily to children, to make them want the toys, the cerial, etc.

This is why they include cute jingles and songs in the adds, because they tend to stick in your head better, and why they use cute animals like geccos and talking turtles and such.

If this is not programming, then what is it? Because unfortunately, it sure is working for a lot of people in advertising.

True, you can choose not to be programmed, but only if you're conscious of the attempt.

Well yeah we are all programmed. The conditioned mind and the ego are all programmed and not really our true nature. But still, even though it is done, I would not lump influencing others and trying to manipulate them as part of a spiritual practice or as personal development or as part of using LoA. It seemed you were lumping using LoA as ok to use to try to control people. I would think that would cause you to feel controlled in the LoA way that you have that vibe of trying to manipulate, then that will become the experience too. You will not be free because you must keep doing something to keep someone else under control, in a sense giving up your freedom because of that link.

[Magicinthenight]

Originally Posted by AdamA

Whenever I get stuck like this I just try something, anything. If I can't choose between 2 decisions, I just pick one and see what happens. Then I use the feedback to gain greater clarity.

I do this. I just pick one. And if it doesn't feel right for some reason, then I know it wasn't the one to pick. I don't think I've ever faced a problem with two EQUALLY appealing/unappealing options. And if none of the decisions feel right, you can always let the matter lie until you absolutely HAVE to make a decision. OR you can come up with other solutions and see if any of those feel right. There is always more than one option available for you at any given time.

[Vibration]

Originally Posted by wolfgang

no - the choice is always right, to me. choice is never wrong. what then happens is we judge the results of a choice later, but at the time the choice is exactly what was possible and the unfolding path for that person.

I see where you're coming from, and I agree with you. I think that maybe we're both correct, or maybe you can help me have a better understanding of choice.

If I were deciding about what career to go into, or whether to get into a relationship with someone or not, that kind of decision is best made by just honestly being myself, by doing what my heart is telling me to do. And I agree, the results will always be right, and lead me on a path that will benefit me.

However, if I had in mind a particular purpose or goal, like obtaining a degree in college, in order to abtain that goal I might have to make some choices I don't like, for instance, doing homework, which I hate. If I don't do the homework, how can that be a "Right choice?" That choice will lead me away from the path I want, not toward it.

In that case, I think PlaysWithLife is correct, that a choice is right or wrong relative to a specific purpose.

[RagsToRiches]

Hi Ellie,

you gotta be careful with "unanswered questions" to which an answer is not forth comming.

Questioning can lead to confusion, confusion can lead to frustration, and frustration can lead to anger, surrender, and pain. (I'm 100% serious)

Of course the relationships between all those things are bi-directional, so you can move up the scale... and it goes further...

Questioning can lead to inspiration, inspiration can lead to fulfillment, and fulfillment/satisfaction can lead to euphoria.

Here's the trick....

just drop the questions for which you have no answer... but continue to allow the solution (hazy as it might be) linger in your mind.

Just don't chase it with questions.

As for emotions - I'm running a series of blog posts right now were I will be writing all of the most effective techniques I've found for managing emotions which you might want to check out. It's a 4 parter and I've already wrote the whole lot - just got a bit of editing to do on the last few bits...

Cheers!

Rich

Originally Posted by ellie

I wasn't sure what area to put this in LOA or emotional mastery, somehow I think the two go together


The last few days I have been going through an internal battle about what is the right decision, my thoughts went from highs to lows, lows to high, from yes to no, to no to yes.

The thing is I didn't really come away with knowing in my heart what the absolute right answer was. My mind was certainly confused and I even though I was trying to understand my mind and what it was doing I could not decipher the "real code".

So how do you do it? Decipher the right answer? How does one get a clear and definitive answer for what is best for them?

I found the process in itself rather confusing, the inner battles, which neither felt right or wrong.

I know this sounds rather cryptic, but do we always get in our mind the right answer, but we decide to block the truth?

[ellie]

Do you want to know something...I wrote the original post when I was drunk - ha ha! And you know what I made the most sense - he he!

Of course what I said was all true, but I don't think I would of been able to articulate it as well is if I was sober

Thanks everyone for your feedback,your feedback was very helpful and as it turned out, it all worked out fine. I think there was no right or wrong answer this time, but I think I am more in tune with what I want these days, so I didn't have to fall from grace so much this time. In the past when I have had these battles, I have fallen flat on my face when I decided to go against my gut feeling....but this time my gut feeling was not really clear at all, even when I analysed it from every angle.

[wolfgang]

Originally Posted by Vibration

If I were deciding about what career to go into, or whether to get into a relationship with someone or not, that kind of decision is best made by just honestly being myself, by doing what my heart is telling me to do. And I agree, the results will always be right, and lead me on a path that will benefit me.

sounds good to me. it could be even when not listening to the heart and sort of getting off the path - there is an experience that is what your total being intended to have.

I hear that it's possible to not have to always be thinking and figuring out what the next choice needs to be. That the choice is given to us and we take it when our times comes for it. However it's not a passive way of living either. I guess that comes with a calm mind and being able to not react to or fear what's going on. If you react of fear something it kicks in the thoughts and emotions that then make it seem like we have to gyrate and squirm to arrive at the best choice through our own processes. But even those processes are conditioned and not free from baggage of old ways.

However, if I had in mind a particular purpose or goal, like obtaining a degree in college, in order to abtain that goal I might have to make some choices I don't like, for instance, doing homework, which I hate. If I don't do the homework, how can that be a "Right choice?" That choice will lead me away from the path I want, not toward it.

it could be looked at that not doing homework as a choice is how you want to run the experience. It is how your complete system is responding to having a goal and also having some belief about homework or something as a block of some kind. So the choice to not do homework is there for you to experience what that's like. It is the perfect choice for how all your habits and behaviors are set up right now. In that way what the experience gives you is something that could help you notice some limiting belief or old mind set that you don't need to run anymore. That's what's right about it - even if the choice isn't helping the big goal.

In other words, you could say you haven't really committed to the goal of getting a degree - that hasn't been decided.

It has just been stated as a goal that you wish to put time in toward, but meanwhile your complete decision - with all your unconscious and conscious put together - isn't "yeah let's commit to the degree". Maybe your conscious thoughts say you have committed to the degree but the unconscious is full of wanting something else - like not doing homework. So then you have to determine if you want your subconscious to get on board with getting a degree. If so, then it takes some action to retrain the subconscious to show it who's the boss.

How's that for spin?

In that case, I think PlaysWithLife is correct, that a choice is right or wrong relative to a specific purpose.

[Vibration]

Originally Posted by wolfgang

How's that for spin?

I'll have to think more about it after I've had some sleep.

Sounds reasonable though