Overcoming pain (and fear of pain) at the dentist

[ssandra]

Hi all,

I went to the dentist yesterday and as usual I left him shocked and feeling bad about himself, simply because he was hurting me A LOT!

Not his fault, he is a great dentist, but my fault..

I cannot seem to control the pain when I am at the dentist. I have tried several things:

Breathing: doesn't work because the pain is so sudden always that I forget to breath normally. When I do remember again, it doesn't seem to help.

Meditation: going to my happy place doesn't work. I feel happy, I feel good, but it still hurts like hell!!

Medication: I swallowed some advil last time, just to already have a bit less pain, but it didn't work...

The process: I've tried the process before, during and after, but it doesn't stop the pain. I appreciate the pain and the power that it must have cost to make me believe it, but it still hurts!

The dentist always uses anesthetics but they don't work either.. my entire mouth (or that side at least) gets numb, but I still feel the pain, as sharp as before...

I am not really afraid of the dentist itself, I go there happily for checkups and stuff, but I am afraid of the pain.. which of course makes it worse again..

The only thing that remotely works is when I put my nails into my hands or arms. Feeling pain there somehow takes the focus away from the pain in my mouth and since I control the pain in my hands it hurts just as much, just differently.
But my husband doesn't like me coming home with marks all over my hands (I cannot blame him...).

So my question is:

Does anybody know something that might help? I have to go back next Tuesday, so it would be wonderful if I had some more tools before that time.

[rei]

interesting that things like anesthetic don't work. has he tried various types, like it sounds like he used the shot of lidocaine stuff, has he used nitrous too?

honestly? it sounds like this is psychological. sounds like you had a past experience where it was way more painful than you expected, and now you expect that level every time. (interesting enough, i drove my mother to the dentist yesterday and ended up meeting a beautiful little girl.)

maybe considering it might be mostly psychological will give you some space to revise the experience?

or... you enjoy some less vanilla sexual experiences... maybe you could imagine he is playing the Dom and this is what you agreed to submit to, to see it as a sexual/erotic type of pain? weird idea i know, but it could work right?

[ssandra]

Originally Posted by rei

interesting that things like anesthetic don't work. has he tried various types, like it sounds like he used the shot of lidocaine stuff, has he used nitrous too?

I have no idea... it is all in Spanish But Tuesday my husband is coming with me, so I'll ask him to ask if there is anything else he can try...

honestly? it sounds like this is psychological. sounds like you had a past experience where it was way more painful than you expected, and now you expect that level every time. (interesting enough, i drove my mother to the dentist yesterday and ended up meeting a beautiful little girl.)

maybe considering it might be mostly psychological will give you some space to revise the experience?

I am considering this, and I do believe that it might be true... I've tried to be extremely objective about it, but still, it HURTS!!! If I am objective about pain, for example cramps or something like that, I can tell if it really really hurts or if it just feels bad.

I can make that distinction at the dentist as well. I know when it just doesn't feel nice, and when it actually hurts.
So, although it has something to do with me not being in control, not being able to decide how much it hurts, I can and have gotten over that part (and it helps, things that just feel bad, don't hurt anymore).

or... you enjoy some less vanilla sexual experiences... maybe you could imagine he is playing the Dom and this is what you agreed to submit to, to see it as a sexual/erotic type of pain? weird idea i know, but it could work right?

I wish it was that easy..

But this is not-nice pain. Somethings are simply not nice, doesn't matter who does it...

[rei]

well, i don't know if i have any perfect suggestions. if it is too much to bear, maybe you could see a doc or i think Mexico has pretty relaxed policies so you could go and get a prescription of some sort, to take before your appointment.

i don't think pills are always the answer and they are often not the best answer, but i also know something like Valium can work well in situations like that. it doesn't make the pain go away, it is there, but the medication affects you in a way so you just don't really care about it like you did.

i don't even feel too comfortable with this idea, but i guess it could be helpful.

[joelr]

You need some pain killers. You could call your dentist and explain that the local A. isn't working and you insist on proper care. See if he will write a script earlier in the day OR ask if he has any oxycodone (either by itself or in Percocet combined with tylenol) at his office. If he does, take at least 2 (10mg).

At 10mg you will still feel pain but you won't care as much. To really feel no pain I think around 15-20 mg is necessary. Having an empty stomach will increase the effects.

Rei's suggestion of valium isn't bad for relaxation and stopping anxiety beforehand but there is zero analygesia and pain is still really annoying on benzo's (valium, ativan, klonapin...).

Or the Doc may choose a weaker version like Vicodin (hydrocodone) or Tylenol with codine. Vicodin is ok but the Ty w/ codine is extremely weak.

It bugs me that MDs are withholding pain meds to ordinary people all over the world now because of lawsuits and things.

[ssandra]

I am thinking to going to a doctor on Monday to explain my problem to see if he has some stronger pain meds.

The dentist here are not allowed to prescribe anything

But I wonder if it will work? I remember when I hurt my wrist, they gave me some pretty strong pain killers in the hospital (the ones you put under your tongue) and although it made me care less that it was hurting, it was still hurting the exact same amount...

Maybe it is a type of pain killer that doesn't work for me. Because advil (ibuprofen) normally works well for headaches or other pains...?

I am going to do some research, going to the doctor on Monday, and ask if the dentist has a different painkiller on Tuesday

Tnx all!

[rei]

Originally Posted by joelr

You need some pain killers. You could call your dentist and explain that the local A. isn't working and you insist on proper care. See if he will write a script earlier in the day OR ask if he has any oxycodone (either by itself or in Percocet combined with tylenol) at his office. If he does, take at least 2 (10mg).

At 10mg you will still feel pain but you won't care as much. To really feel no pain I think around 15-20 mg is necessary. Having an empty stomach will increase the effects.

Rei's suggestion of valium isn't bad for relaxation and stopping anxiety beforehand but there is zero analygesia and pain is still really annoying on benzo's (valium, ativan, klonapin...).

Or the Doc may choose a weaker version like Vicodin (hydrocodone) or Tylenol with codine. Vicodin is ok but the Ty w/ codine is extremely weak.

It bugs me that MDs are withholding pain meds to ordinary people all over the world now because of lawsuits and things.

well, both types of medication are addictive and i don't recommend that anyone play with them. but docs will prescribe benzos like Valium to people with chronic back problems - they wouldn't do it if it didn't help with the psychological resistance to the painful stimulus. sure, technically the pain is still there, but it is far easier to deal with it.

yes, painkillers can work too, but she said she doesn't have a lot of success with that. opiates should work though? i have heard of people having funny reactions to opiates (nausea, rashes, hallucinations) but not sure i've heard of them just not working, though it could be they didn't help with the level of pain.

if all else fails, maybe the docs over there could put you on some Vercet - it's a combination of benzo medicine and opiate medicine, so you are both relaxed/care less about the pain and feeling less pain. docs used Vercet with me for a procedure before, that stuff does work...