creativty, changes, letting go

[harambasa]

hi everyone,

i'm fairly new here so i hope i put this in the right place!


since early summer its been a strange, dizzying time in every area from relationships to family to friends and finances. my old notions of reality came crashing down hard...forced me into putting my main creative project/business on hold while i dealt with more prominent life issues at hand.
around the same time a pretty sudden, major spiritual re-awakening has forced me (and still is) to re-evaluate my life even more. my intuition has gone through the roof, i've finally accepted it and i pretty much know i'm being pushed by the universe to open up...weed out all the unnecessary junk that's holding me back from being who i really am.


after going through a whole gamut of emotions about these things, i've begun to realize the creative path/business i was pursuing may not be so right for me after all. its stagnating, i'm frustrated with it, nothing seemed to be going right before i had to put it on hold. i'm no longer resonating with it at all. and this isn't the first time i felt these things.


much of the frustration comes from feeling like this project was nipped in the bud just when it was beginning to get successful. its full potential was never actualized. the rest of the frustration comes from how i put *so much* into it (financially *and* emotionally/mentally) and have gotten very little in return, which makes me even less satisfied with myself as an artist. and the satisfaction issue stems into a whole bunch of other things too, mostly the collaborative nature of the work itself and the attitude of the industry i must deal with to do this as a business (i can elaborate later on this but i dont want to make the initial post too terribly long). i know if i decide to continue it, some pretty major changes have to be made but i'm not sure i have the heart to do it anymore at all...changes or no.

in one sense i see how all creative expression is connected so by choosing another medium i'm not doing any disservice to my essence as an artist. i don't see dead ends, only expanding options and future potentials. i'm well versed in music, djing, drawing, graphic design, film so i'm not short on paths!


now my question is....
is this a case of an empire built on unstable foundations needing to be destroyed so it can be rebuilt on more solid grounds? or do i say let it go and move on to a whole brand new expression?
am i just going through a funk and should ride it out knowing once i do this project will be successful? or do i go down a new adventurous path not knowing where that path will take me? or do i just simply quit fussing and do both even though that might involve some compromise that i don't know if i can make either?!


my intuition is screaming find the new path.... but then how do i let go of that dissatisfied failure feeling so i can positively channel creativity instead of funnel resentment?

i haven't had much problems letting go or changing other situations that weren't working but this situation keeps pulling me back


thoughts anyone?

[themaster]

Well, I've been there done that.. I had a business that I planned, theoretically wanted and I just let it fall apart/to pieces.. noticed that my heart isn't in it.. even now I'm letting my current business fall to pieces because my heart isn't in that..

You have to follow your heart!! Every time!

Do you really want to be in a business.. where you feel unmotivated? unhappy? unfulfilled? and 0 positive emotions?? now that sounds like death to me.. or at least very unfun

Originally Posted by harambasa

my intuition is screaming find the new path.... but then how do i let go of that dissatisfied failure feeling so i can positively channel creativity instead of funnel resentment?

Stop calling it a failure move it to neutral and call it a "learning experience"

Originally Posted by harambasa

in one sense i see how all creative expression is connected so by choosing another medium i'm not doing any disservice to my essence as an artist. i don't see dead ends, only expanding options and future potentials. i'm well versed in music, djing, drawing, graphic design, film so i'm not short on paths!

This is a neutral to positive statement.. I would head in that direction..

is this a case of an empire built on unstable foundations needing to be destroyed so it can be rebuilt on more solid grounds?

This is what you create it to be.. whatever sounds like your highest excitement is the way to go.. don't bother judging or thinking or rationalizing or EGO'ing.. if you can follow your excitement every time.. you will be supported even if your MIND can't figure out HOW!

am i just going through a funk and should ride it out knowing once i do this project will be successful?

You are your own person.. I would decide for you.. but honestly if the energy is not there DROP it.. you don't have to drop the business.. but drop the focus sometimes we get LED one way only to make a 300% about turn and come back to what we wanted..

or do i go down a new adventurous path not knowing where that path will take me?

Adventure is good.. as my teachers says "follow your excitement" and when he gets a person up there and asks "have you been following your excitement?" and they pause he says.. hesitation usually means "no"

or do i just simply quit fussing and do both even though that might involve some compromise that i don't know if i can make either?!

Stop EGO'ing.. put a little trust in your gut, intuition.. in your heart even.. we don't need BRAINS to operate here regardless of how our society runs.. those who have the most ease here, the easiest time and the funnest times are often not using their BRAINS.

my intuition is screaming find the new path.... but then how do i let go of that dissatisfied failure feeling so i can positively channel creativity instead of funnel resentment?

Again.. Stop calling it a failure move it to neutral and call it a "learning experience"

thoughts anyone?

Food for thought? even exchange

[Penelopi]

i just want to comment and say thanks to themaster it also helped me to see a diff view on how i will deal with my problem as well, thanks!