I soo feel like a failure right now for failing Med Exam

[hopefulmedicalstudent]

Ok, so I failed. I failed the MCAT miserably. I couldn't believe it but somehow I knew that the way I studied wasn't the best one. I've known my score since yesterday and I haven't been able to tell anyone. My mom is great but she basically told everyone I was taking this test and now everyone keeps asking about my score. I have to take it again, which doesn't really matter, except that it's so expensive. I don't know I guess I feel upset at myself because deep down I knew I wasn't studying as hard as I should have but I actually convinced myself I did the best I could. I guess it could be worse I had actually done everything I could and still failed. Hopefully I can take it again and still be eligible to get into Med School in August. I need to tell my mother but I can't right now, I;m pretty much processing it myself so I need a few days. I've always gotten great grades. I was never into Science in high school and my love for Medicine was a late bloomer because it started after I got my BA. Right now I'm in pre-med and classes are going great I have a 3.80 GPA and I'm working hard. I guess anxiety played a really big part of this failure but I can't help feeling awful. Thank you to whoever reads this. It's good to finally be able to tell someone.

[rawxstasy]

I'm sorry. It's hard but sometimes we need these failures to learn how to do better next time. I can't count how many times I failed at something but kept on going. Don't worry about what others think. They should know it's a hard test. There is nothing wrong with admitting failure. I failed a class in my nursing school and it was due to being sexually assaulted -which wasn't my fault! But I was so ashamed to tell people I failed, especially fellow classmates. Just tell them, if they think any less of you, it's THEIR problem, not yours.

[drakemer]

I think you owe it to yourself to forgive yourself, learn from the experience, and move forward. I'm glad that you desire to be a doctor strongly - that means you know that you can take the test again and succeed!

You can accept your feelings of disappointment and let them go when you're ready.

Your mom sounds very supportive and excited about your future - she loves you so much that she talks about your life with everyone else I think a lot of mothers talk about their children this way (I know that mine does.) I think she will respect you a lot for taking time to process/learn from the experience. Remember, perseverance is a virtue! You don't even have to talk about the specific "number" of your score - it's as simple as saying, "I didn't do as well as I wanted, so I'm going to learn from my results and do much better next time!"

Also, I have yet to meet someone who finds standardized tests user-friendly - you are neither the first person, nor the last person who will struggle with them! Take heart - you'll be a better med student by this process of learning better study methods

[ar81]

I can see you being a doctor, and paying the money back (for the failed exam) to your mom later. Anything in the middle is just a soap opera.
Past can be changed. What will you do with your future?

[Strangemagik]

And Albert Einstein was said to have failed math. Go on retake the test everything will be ok.

[hopefulmedicalstudent]

[
Thank you all for you words of support. I still haven't told my mom which is bad I know I'm just not ready yet. My classmates already asked and I told them I was taking it again but lied about my score because the real score it's too low to reveal. What makes it so hard to tell is the fact that it's a really expensive test and right now money is extremely tight and I feel bad that I failed. Plus I have to pay a lot of money with the med school application and stuff. I'm feeling really down lately, Im thinking about going to see a psychologist or something. My hair keeps falling and I'm just really stressed and afraid (for the first time ever) of how I feel. I'm just so scared of failing again. I can't even tell my mom. I feel really bad for lying to her. I need to just suck it up and tell her and accept it myself.

[ar81]

She will know sooner or later.
The later, the worse...
By not telling you are feeding false hope.
Telling will unleash hell, but if you cheat her by not telling and she finds out, she will not trust you because you'd be a liar to her, and that's far worst than failing. Not only she will feel bad about the exam, but bad about not being able to trust you.

[ALi2010]

Though you failed the test, tell yourself you completely accept yourself. Nothing to do except accept it and move on, yes?

And remember, you will be taking it again. If you fail again, you can take it again. If you fail more, you can continue to take it more. Because you WILL succeed.

Money may be tight, but this is about your dreams. Your family will understand. It seems like your mom told a lot of people you took the test, because she supports your dream. She wants you to get into medical school because YOU want to get into it. She's telling others because she's "bragging" about you. She's happy that you are taking the test because she believed you would do well on it. She supports you, you should start supporting yourself too. Especially your beliefs.

Remember, it's not the end of the world if you fail something.

What happened since you didn't do well on this test?
You decided to take it again because you can.
What happens if you don't do well on the next test?
You can easily take it again, and many times after that if need be.

What happens if you tell your mom?
She'll be surprised, obviously. But I think she will support you. She loves you and cares about you. You were dealing with anxiety and stress. Anxiety on tests can fail you. Seriously. I'm sure she will understand and you will feel RELIEVED if you tell her... like a big weight is finally off your shoulders.

My friend in math class in high school, she's real smart. She studies for daysss even though she always aces the tests and assignments. What happens on the final exam? She fails. She was reallyreallyreally worried and stressed out even though she knew everything and always did well on all the stuff that was on the final. Yeah. This is what anxiety will do to you. She kept believing she wouldn't do well. She kept worrying about horrible outcomes that didn't happen yet. Unrecommended.

Remember to believe you can do it! Because you can.

In grade 7, when I was like 12 years old... my teacher was always stated that his favourite quote was, "If at first you don't succeed... try, try again." Okay. I don't remember the exact wording of it lol.

So yes. The test may be hard but you studied for it. If you worry about something, ask yourself what happens in the end- and what other things you can do if the "worst" thing happens. Yeah. It's really not the end of the world.

[HEROpureLOVE]

I'm curious about something. Are you really passionate about becoming a doctor, nurse, surgeon or whatever it is you are aiming for? Or are you still unsure, a little wobbly about your perceived future? Perhaps you just haven't made that commitment yet. Have you set your purpose? When you know what you truly want you will no longer need to force yourself to go through the motions. Studying should be fun and motivation easy to come by. Try reinforcing your purpose and make a commitment. If you are committed to your purpose you will not view a bad test as failure. You will merely view it as a benchmark of your progress and use it as motivation to further propel you to action.

I spent a great deal of effort and time chasing something I thought I wanted to do. It was tedious and frustrating and I forced myself to trudge every step of the way and I couldn't even explain to myself why i was doing it anymore. I realized I wasn't following my passion I only hoped that it would become my passion. I was half right/wrong. Sometimes it's okay to quit.

I'm not telling you to give up. I just want you to be aware of what you're doing and why you're doing it.

[joelr]

A failing grade doesn't mean YOU are a failure. It's just a result. Now you know your study habits were not effective enough. No one can blame or judge you for that.

Our education system favors those who have a knack for remembering information quickly. Some very smart people don't possess that skill and have to study like crazy for exams. Like someone pointed out, Einstein was like that.

[hopefulmedicalstudent]

Thank you all. I finally told her (my mom). I will be taking the test again. I am TRULY passionate about becoming a doctor. I know that a bad score on the test is not a failure, but since my BA is in "Audiovisual Communications" I've had to work extra hard to convince others (as I am truly 100% convinced) that Medicine is my right career path. My mother believes that since I love acting (which hasn't changed just because I'm now planning on being a doctor) I saw a Strong Medicine, Grey's Anatomy, Chicago Hope, etc and decided I wanted to be a doctor. I have assured her that this is not true, I mean I do love those shows and I will forever love acting, but the first day I set foot on the Natural Sciences Department was the first day I felt like I was where I was supposed to be. I take acting classes when I have the chance. And then my mom gets mad because she says that I don't really know what I want. It's really frustrating because the fact that I love taking acting classes has NOTHING to do with the fact that I really want to be a doctor. When I am studying Organic Chemistry, Physics and Biology (I love it but it's hard) it's a very welcomed change to be able to go distract myself with acting which is something I'm naturally good at. I am 26 years old and my mother still wants to control my life and keeps doubting me about my desire to become a doctor just because I now belong to a theater group. Financially, right now it's not a reality for me to move out. Do you guys think that the fact that I love acting and it distracts me from the stress and pressure from the upcoming MCAT makes me ambivalent about my future??

My mom sure thinks so!

[rawxstasy]

I can understand what you are going through. I failed one of my nursing courses and it set me back 1.5 years. But I will be graduating nursing school in 3 weeks - Yaahooo!! It took me six years to get a four year degree. But I don't care. I can't imagine myself doing anything else. If it's really what you want to do, you won't let anything stop you.

I am 26 years old and my mother still wants to control my life and keeps doubting me about my desire to become a doctor just because I now belong to a theater group.

I would just let what she says in one ear and out the other. My mother didn't think I'd make anything of myself and I just ignored all her negative comments and now she totally believes in me. Just keep on working toward your goal and when she sees your determination, she'll quit. Maybe you also need to set some boundaries with her if you're living there.

[danthony]

Originally Posted by hopefulmedicalstudent

Ok, so I failed. I failed the MCAT miserably. I couldn't believe it but somehow I knew that the way I studied wasn't the best one. I've known my score since yesterday and I haven't been able to tell anyone. My mom is great but she basically told everyone I was taking this test and now everyone keeps asking about my score. I have to take it again, which doesn't really matter, except that it's so expensive. I don't know I guess I feel upset at myself because deep down I knew I wasn't studying as hard as I should have but I actually convinced myself I did the best I could. I guess it could be worse I had actually done everything I could and still failed. Hopefully I can take it again and still be eligible to get into Med School in August. I need to tell my mother but I can't right now, I;m pretty much processing it myself so I need a few days. I've always gotten great grades. I was never into Science in high school and my love for Medicine was a late bloomer because it started after I got my BA. Right now I'm in pre-med and classes are going great I have a 3.80 GPA and I'm working hard. I guess anxiety played a really big part of this failure but I can't help feeling awful. Thank you to whoever reads this. It's good to finally be able to tell someone.

Failure is just opportunity in disguise. You can choose to look at this as a complete failure or a stepping stone to further your success. If it helps (and I know it will), Walt Disney was rejected hundreds of times by various banks before one of them said Yes to his funding of little theme park called Disney World. Heard of it? You never know what you can turn your failures into but really learn from them and expand on your knowledge.

[openeyes]

Originally Posted by hopefulmedicalstudent

I guess it could be worse I had actually done everything I could and still failed.

I don't know how much you/your family can afford for MCAT preparation, but there are companies like Kaplan that have courses for preparing for it. One of my friends took a ~$1500 class with them and ended up doing very well afterward, while some people spend over $8000 for intensive summer courses. If that is a bit much, even a bit of serious study with an MCAT preparation book and sample test should help.

[Froztwolf]

At least you've only had to try once already. Imagine this poor woman after her 949th time of failing her driver's licence exam S.Korean Woman Passes Drive Test After 950th Time

[hopefulmedicalstudent]

Hey guys, I have not posted in ages. SInce that last time, I took the test again and did worse, and then took it again and did better but some documents got lost (some transcriptions from one of my colleges) and I was not able to apply to Medical School on 2010. Then my mom became hysteric and practically violent towards me saying that she was very sorry I made the Med School Decision too late in my life and that she could not afford to support me while I was going through the application process which is both stressful and expensive. On August 2010 I got the opportunity to get a Master's degree and a Risk Management in Healthcare Certification with and have now graduated with a 4.0 GPA. Grades have never been the problem for me, its the stupid MCAT. I did better, but not well enough to get into the state school, so I guess I will take it again sometime. After I have worked a while and I can save some money for the application process and to save a seat IF I get accepted. So in a sense it's back to square 1. On the other hand since I can now get a job my mom is happier and is taking me more seriously. I also have been going to a therapist for about a year and that has helped too. However you guys were the people I first told, strangers who in my heart became good friends. So thank you so much.!!! Hope all is well with you.

[rawxstasy]

Oh I'm so glad we could help! I actually failed my exam for my nursing license the first time but I passed the second time. Maybe you are having test anxiety? I had test anxiety and that really affected how I did on the exam. Maybe you should look into anti anxiety meds for temporary? There's 3 docs, 2 pyscologists and a couple of nurses that I know who had to take meds to get through the exams. It's not unusual.

[James81]

Heh, I almost didn't notice how old this thread was. Then I saw your update and realized that my original reply still fits. A quote that really inspires me:

Fall a 100 times, rise 101 times.

Now let me give you some facts about me:

Midway through my undergrad degree, I flunked so many classes that I went on academic probation. I finally pulled it together (I took some classes in that program up to three times) and graduated with a BS degree in Engineering. (2.3 GPA thanks to my couple of "bad" semesters.)

Engineering is such that you have to take two tests beyond your degree to get licensed as a professional engineer.

I took the first test, (called the "FE" or Fundamentals of Engineering Exam) 3 times before I passed it.

This past fall, I took the second test (called the "PE" or the Professional Engineers Exam...the one that grants the license) for the second time and failed it. (Failed this one twice as well.) I plan to retake that test next year in October.

I applied to a Master's of Arts in Teaching program this past winter and I had to interview three different times for it (because of my low GPA from my undergrad) and, after hearing the doubts of the people who interviewed me, they gave me a shot and I got in.

Part of THIS program requires you to take the Praxis exam in the content area you plan to teach in (mine is math). I took that test back in March...and failed...failed it pretty hard actually. Took it again in April and passed.

I bring up all of that as a shining example that tenacity and resilience will get you want you want. How many people would've given up after all of that? My academic career is littered with failure (at least in my college years...high school was very different), but I've consistently gotten where I needed to be because I hung in there and when I'd fail it would suck, but I'd get back on the horse and try it again. In fact, I was already registered for the Praxis for a third time before I even got my scores, because I know that if you stick with it, you'll eventually get it.

Tests aren't a measure of your intelligence. I completely suck at standardized tests, but I know that I'll make a fantastic teacher and that I am pretty deng smart.

[James81]

Oh! Just thought of another test that I failed once before I passed it on the second try. The Insurance licensing exam. I took that back in college so that I could sell insurance. Studied like a mo fo for that one and still failed it. Got back up, tried again, and got it on the second go 'round.

I'm also reminded of the quote from Rocky:

It's not about how hard you can hit, but how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward.

[meanttobehappy]

I remember listening to a set of tapes back maybe 10 or 15 years ago. The tapes recounted a true story of a sales executive who blew a $6 million deal. He went home and crafted a resignation letter, knowing the result of losing so much money for the company he had been working at for only a relatively short time.

The next morning he walked into the president's office and laid the letter on his desk.

The president of the company unfolded the letter, read over it, then looked up at the recent college grad and asked, "Are you really going to leave the company after we invested $6 million in your training?"

Long story short: He stayed. He learned lots from his huge and extremely expensive mistake and went on to make both the company and himself a huge amount of money.

My motto has long been, "Live and learn!" That's what life is all about. We often learn more from our mistakes than our successes, besides.

[hopefulmedicalstudent]

You guys are the best!! And in a couple of years there WILL be an update that will say I GOT INTO MED SCHOOL. I suck at standardized test bad, probably at tests in general. Well, not like tests for classes, I do pretty well in those, but tests that you have to pass in order to do something (like the driving test) I failed that one the first time. Hit one of those orange things they set up for parking. When I took the college board (that is a test we take here in Puerto Rico which is pretty much like the SAT) the first time, the first part I panicked and marked all the answers in the booklet but not in the answer sheet and I didn't have time to fill it completely so I just took that part again and did very well. I definitely have test anxiety, and when its time to take the stupid MCAT again I will look into some anti anxiety meds not just for the day of the test but for like a week or two before. Also to make sure I dont get groggy cause that would suck. I feel like I have never like hard core studied for it. Maybe because I think that Im going to get a crappy score and I can't concentrate. I took the Princeton Review and it helped some, but even though I know most of the concepts the application of them is what gives me a hard time. Plus I've never done allll the practice tests available, I just get soo anxious that I cant get through them.
This has been a hard week because even though Im happy that I graduated and will now go on to get a job, most of the people I did my Master's with used it as a trampoline for either Med or Pharm School and most of them got in and are all excited for it, and I am excited for them, but that self destructive part of me feels a little bit like a failure. I didn't apply this year, with the last score I got I could have maybe gotten it one of the private, more expensive schools but I knew I had to work so I didn't want to get accepted and then say no, so Im giving it time. I guess I'm better, and I do know that waiting a little bit is the right choice. MCAT scores last 3 years so by the time I apply probably those two awful first times, will be history, if not on paper on my mind. I am very happy that all of you did well on your tests, and for those who didn't your time will come. By the way, I love that Rocky quote LOL.
I guess it will be a little bit liberating to NOT think about Medical School for a while, even though its always on the back of my mind. Working in the health field will also give me experience which will be beneficial for me on interviews.