Anxiety vs. Mindfulness

[HoneyOat]

There is one goal: I would like to incorporate meditation into my daily life, or at least a level of mindfulness and awareness.

I feel that I cannot achieve mindfulness without meditation.

The problem: I am full of too much angst to meditate.

I now understand the mind/body dichotomy and that is important to reconcile. I just don't know how. My body would like to meditate. It sits, it can be still, it breathes, it's eyes are closed. But my mind would like nothing of that. Where does that strength come to turn the mind off?

I've never felt so multiphrenic. It's scary.

[Aleksander Krstic]

I think with practice you'll learn to comfort your mind.

[HoneyOat]

Does it count as practice if my body is meditating and my mind is not?

I feel like, it is asking if going to soccer practice still counts as going to soccer practice when you are off to the side of the field picking wildflowers. Well sure I was there, but I did zilch for my soccer skills.

This is a conscious choice, I understand. I must say I'm going to do this, and I do often say that. I always find myself very nervous though, and my mind starts racing. This is not a peaceful feeling. I feel I am more peaceful eating strawberries and drinking coffee.

[Coffeesmurf]

Mindfulness meditation is not about turning the mind off.

Trying searching for Jon Kabat-Zinn on YouTube. There's a lot of good videos where he explains the concepts of mindfulness meditation and also some guided meditations conducted by him.

A good starting point is just sitting and being mindful of the breath. How does it feel at the nosetip when breathing in and out, for instance? When the lungs fill and empty? When your stomach moves in and out? When your mind wanders off to think about something - "stressful" or "joyful" - note what you have shifted focus to and gently and without judgment move the focus back to the breath. Don't beat yourself up for losing focus on the breath.

You might also want to check out videos and writings by Thich Nhat Hanh, a vietnamese zen buddhist monk, who has done a lot to bring mindfulness meditation to the West.

In the words of Jon Kabat-Zinn:

It is not uncommon for people who know little of meditation except what they have gleaned from the media to harbor the notion that meditation is basically a willful inward manipulation, akin to throwing a switch in your brain, that results in your mind going completely blank. No more thought, no more worry. You are catapulted into the "meditative" state, which is always one of deep relaxation, peace, calm, and insight, often associated with concepts of "nirvana" in the public's mind.

This notion is a serious, if totally understandable, misperception. Meditation practice can be fraught with thought and worry and desire, and every other mental state and affliction known to frequent human beings. It is not the content of your experience that is important. What is important is our ability to be aware of that content, and even more, of the factors that drive its unfolding and the ways in which those factors either liberate us or imprison us moment by moment and year in, year out.

[MiBeloved]

Meditation is the way to control the ansy pansy habits of the mind, but you need training in meditation.
When you have time, take a look at my recent book which has detailed descriptions and also mind diagrams of how to gradually get control of the mind.

https://www.createspace.com/Customer....do?id=3380228


Amazon.com: Meditation Pictorial: Michael Beloved: Books

[Lanya]

I'm still adjusting my meditation routine every couple days, but...this is what I was doing for my meditation routine a couple weeks ago:

I sit down, pick up a book, turn to a page, and count the number of words in each sentence, starting at the top of the page. After each sentence, I double-check the counting, just to make sure I'm focusing on counting correctly. I do this for each sentence for three pages.

I've noticed that I can get distracted from the counting when I'm really interested in the content of a book. So I found a French novel (sine I don't know French very well), and use only that book for counting. Can't get distracted by what I can't understand . So yeah, if you happen to have a book lying around that's in a language you don't understand, that'd be ideal.

I took the idea from this article, if that helps at all.

But anyway, after I've counted for three pages, I put down the book and count my breathing for a while. I count every inhale and exhale I take. That is, on my first inhale, I count "1", then when I exhale I count, "2"; on my next inhale I count "3", and so on. Right now, I count up to 300 (takes me about 10 minutes).

I do three pages and 300 breaths specifically because that's around the time I start to lose focus and start getting lost in thought again. But it's a great improvement so far, because before, I would just stick with one exercise and be lost in thought the whole session. Now, I can guarantee some time where I can focus.


And right now, I'm experimenting with doing The Work while focusing on my breath. Mostly on any qualms I have at the moment on meditating (e.g. "I have to get up now!", "This is boring.")


I guess the most important thing for me is making a Frankenstein of different stuff. Slapping together aspects of different techniques I think work for me, and just experimenting.

[ethereal]

Turning the mind and thoughts off takes purification. Simple meditation may or may not do the job, as there is so much crap to purify. Meditation at the early levels of just watching the breath and such may delete a few energies per session, while there are zillions and zillions of energies left to be purified. The more you advance the more purification power your mind and energy system has, and towards the end meditation becomes a very powerful purifying practice. But in the beginning it may be more useful to to do some other practices like:

1) introspection: find out the ego payoff (energy addiction to negative states) in whatever problem you are faced with. Anxiety may be just the mind wanting to think too much. Why? As the first lesson in ACIM (A Course in Miracles) states, "My thoughts don't mean anything." See if you can get in touch with the energy of your thoughts, and surrender your grasping onto that energy.
2) mantra: a mantra that you are initiated with from a teacher has the purification power of the words themselves plus the power that the teacher has transmitted to you. This means you are purifying with the mantra at the same rate that the teacher would purify at, more or less. If you can't get a teacher to give you a mantra, use one of the generic ones like the Gayatri mantra or "Om"
3) think about Truth: this gives your mind something to do so it's less anxious. You can try doing koans, or think about a statement of nondual truth and try to get to the state from which that statement is made, rather than trying to grasp it intellectually.
4) chakra clearing: Erin made a good post on this, I don't have much experience with it to say how well it works though.

Try out lots of different practices and see which ones work best for you. Everybody has a different set of practices that are useful at different times, so you have to refer to yourself as the ultimate authority and see what practice you should do. Ones that don't work now may work beautifully later, when your mind is ready for it.

[HoneyOat]

Ethereal,

Something you said, or apparently ACIM said, has really helped me.

"My thoughts have no meaning."

I don't know if this was the intended way but it has helped me in other ways than preparing for meditation.

In that...my thoughts have no meaning to anyone else. I can think and plan all I want, but thoughts and daydreams will produce nothing if that is all they are.

Thank you everyone who has replied, you've all been a tremendous help. I am going to look into what some of you say.

I suppose I have never heard of meditation incorporating my worries/anxieties. This is interesting and I will have to think more on it.

[tsjechov]

Isn't it an idea to go to a meditation course, or group?

Total blankness is (almost?) not possible, but it is the way going there, trying it step for step that matters.

[Shenpen]

If you want to be able to meditate in a way that is more relaxed, centered and calm, I have an odd suggestion for you: Do an hour of high intensity exercise (running, swim, bike etc.). The endorphin-levels that you get from that will remind you what calm and relaxed feels like and you will be able to build on that.

[HoneyOat]

Shenpen, I think that's a wonderful suggestion actually. Thank you.