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| | #1 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 36
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Thanks for reading this! I seem to have no purpose in life right now, I keep thinking that anything I might try to do is a futile effort as if there's no point in doing anything and there's no meaning in anything. I used to have grand dreams and desires of accomplishment but lately I can't seem to find the urge to feel anything at all. I feel numb. |
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| | #2 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 192
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You might want to try living without any kind of goals for a while. And maybe you don't feel a sense of purpose right now because you're in between purposes? Maybe this is just a "hibernation" period before you move on to something else. Try simply enjoying the present--whatever you're doing right now. If there is anything you've wanted to do or learn or enjoy, give it a try. But seriously--it's okay not to be on fire for something, or be charging ahead all the time. We all need rest, and maybe this is just your time to do it. I use these kinds of drifty, aimless periods to examine what I think I really want, and simply enjoy myself. And when I'm relaxed and focused on just being as happy as I can be for right now, a new purpose usually evolves out of it.
__________________ Why yes, I do have a blog. |
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| Member Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 36
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| | #5 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 37
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It's very difficult for most people to find fulfilling purpose in their lives, but it's something we all need. I highly suggest you read "A Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl and/or read the article I wrote about the meaning of life based on this book. Viktor Frankl was a psychotherapist who survived several Nazi concentration camps. I've found his insight and experience to be quite valuable.
__________________ Vin Miller NaturalBias.com Maximizing life through health, fitness and perspective |
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| | #6 (permalink) |
| Banned Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 207
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You are selffish... buddy.........just look at yourself. You are at age where you should enjoy , earn money and make life of people you love good and comfortable. If you good enough in that........then extend it to people who want to live but suffer from diseases or are left out by people. IF given a choice, I wont live for myself too......but for people , yes i do. that helps me to love myself too and get success. It is a chain of events., It is a rat race of world. You need to enjoy the journey, if you dont have than create one. So you have work. How you keep yourself busy............keep yourself busy and such thoughts wont come to your mind. I go at 8 and come back at 9 in night. But the beer after work gives me the joy of life. At times I do work for that beer too. I somehow enjoy small things in life. Dont take me wrong.........lets keep talking, I am with you. You can read about me in my about me page. |
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| | #7 (permalink) |
| Junior Member Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 7
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SomebodySomewhere - i feel your pain mate, i am in that exact frame of mind, and have been for some time, at least 2 years, and its now got to a stage where i was so depressed i dumped my girlfriend of 8 years because i felt that i'd suddenly become a different person or want to set myself new goals etc. I've since found out that this was a very bad decision. I changed something for the wrong reasons. What i'm trying to say is speak to your girlfriend, and make her aware of exactly how your feeling right now, she will understand better than anyone, and more so she really needs to know everything about you. I know your situation is different, but whatever you do, and whatever decisions you make, think them through, speak to people, give it time(time is a crazy thing) before making any decision, and the best bit of advice i can give, and something i never ever did was just start doing the things you love, a hobby, something to keep you learning. Life is the same as anything else, a relationship or job etc, just think if you stop learning new stuff in your job you get bored and frustrated, the same with life, if your bored, learn something new, even if its an evening course in photography or whatever i bet suddenly you will forget this whole "purpose of life" thing, and just get on with things. The key to life is to continuing to learn new things. Good luck mate |
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| | #8 (permalink) |
| Junior Member Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 7
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Also, just to ask, what were these big dreams of yours? not specifically, but were they mainly materialistic? For me, i had a dream of moving to London, falling in love, earning a certain amount of money by the time i was 25, buying a sporty car. I achieved all these things at 23, and honestly felt like nothing could touch me, i was THE MAN! But now i've achieved these things i've realised they were never very important in the 1st place, and secondly weren't the things that actually fulfilled me, because i still have all those things, and more, but i blame them all for me being unhappy. To anyone else reading this, am i right in thinking that i need to continue to learn new things and be willing to change your behaviours etc in order to just get along in life and enjoy it for what it is? Thanks |
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| | #9 (permalink) | |
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What you have to do is rediscover - or discover for the first time, what you are really living for. What excites you. What is meaningful to you in life. It sounds like you're not really certain of these things at the moment. Remember: meaning is whatever you assign to something. There is no grand MEANING we all live for, rather there things that are individually meaningful to each of us. Your job now is to find out what is meaningful to YOU, to set goals around them and then to pursue them. Its not actually as difficult as it may feel, its just a challenge you have that has been exacerbated over time and now feels like a crisis. It isnt. You just need a plan and some introspection. Get a life coach to help you, will speed up the process enormously.
__________________ I'm sorry, could you repeat yourself? I couldn't hear you over the sound of my own awesomeness. | |
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| | #10 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member | Quote:
The first is to find out what is meaningful through a process of elimination - which you seem to have tried. Set some goals, try new stuff, move on if it doesnt work out. The danger is that you may live a life of trying everything but finding nothing satisfying. The second approach is to first determine what is meaningful to you (through a process of introspection etc) and use this to develop a good direction, which should at some point dove-tail with very meaningful and fulfilling pursuits. What is meaningful to a person may evolve over the course of ones life but eith this approach we'll always be living in concert with our real values and principles - and that means always having self-respect and probably achieving our desires to live meaningful, purposeful lives.
__________________ I'm sorry, could you repeat yourself? I couldn't hear you over the sound of my own awesomeness. | |
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| | #11 (permalink) |
| Senior Member |
It's your beliefs that are holding you back. From your perspective, nothing matters. But that's only because you think nothing matters. Your purpose is of your own creation. You decide what your purpose is. So even if the world has no meaning, you can still create one for yourself.
__________________ AndrewBrunelle.com--Getting back in touch with the Earth and being human, one blog post at a time. Facebook|Myspace |
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| | #13 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: nowhere and everywhere
Posts: 107
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To SomebodySomewhere, before periods of great change, there is often periods of rest. You can't have one without the other. Listen to MagicalRealist, learn to enjoy this moment - for when you are READY, you will move forward. Good luck.
__________________ ---------------------------------------- New at AdvancingMan.com - The Success Equation: How to Start and Finish Your Goals "Don't waste your time, or time will waste you" - Muse | |
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| | #14 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 108
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Maybe you could take this time to learn something new, start reading about a certain subjects. Once you start doing one thing, other things will come. It can start with reading about a certain subject, than finding a class in your area on that subject, meeting new people there, making new friends, finding a new hobby,... Most of the time it starts with one little step. Anyway, I found myself in your situation about two months ago and I can also relate to the story of Gillet. I've achieved a lot in the very short period that I've been here on this planet, but sometimes it seems of no meaning at all. Instead of just doing nothing and stare blankly in front of me, I decided to start reading all kinds of different blogs and that's how I ended up here. I don't know where I'll go from here, but here's where I am now and I'm trying to learn things about awareness, consciousness, creativity, enjoying life,... I know this will get me somewhere new. Until then I will be carrying a sense of uneasiness with me, but that's ok. Everything will turn out just fine. So my advice would be: pick a subject, any subject en start learning. |
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| | #15 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 455
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| | #16 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 1,927
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It looks like a mild depression to me. Depression is like a biochemical cheat. You are being cheated by a biochemical reaction in your brain that makes you see the world as you do. It is like having a veil that blinds you. You have a purpose, but you need to find a way not to be cheated by your brain.
__________________ Freedom - When people learn to embrace criticism about politicians, since politicians are just employees like you and me. | |
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| | #18 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: UK
Posts: 54
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Friend - you do have a purpose in life; even if you don't yet realise it. Read this book (it's free) ... 7 Keys to Success Best regards Will |
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| | #20 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 455
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Purposelessness might actually be… fun. Without a purpose we wouldn’t have to compare our current life, say a life without purpose for instance, with the life we imagine we’re supposed to be living, the one with purpose. Life might possibly be a lot more joyful without that mental comparison. We might free some mental space up to notice the exquisite splendor that surrounds us, right here, right now without the painful feelings we’re told we’re supposed to feel because we can’t believe in purpose at the moment the way we used to. Then again, what would we do with all that existential angst we love to experience when we either lose our belief in purpose or when we’re bombarded by contradictory answers to the same question about said purpose? Perhaps the reason the answers about purpose contradict is because the answers are entirely subjective, which could mean those answers don’t apply outside of the particular human mind they came from, which could mean that any ole answer or even no answer at all would suffice. A meaningless life is just as joyful, wondrous and full of mystery as a meaningful one is. Or not. I could be completely off base! The beauty of it is that with or without purpose, life can be amazing! And just to be clear, I’m not going to argue that someone shouldn’t believe in purpose if they do. To me that would be like attempting to argue a theist out of his/her religious faith and I’ve learned the hard way no wins that argument! These conversations are awesome. You guys on this forum are so dam smart it isn’t even funny! |
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| | #22 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 663
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On the subject of "life purpose", to be completely honest I think a lot of people treat it rather arrogantly, as if they knew exactly what the point of their life is. Given how much a person's "purpose" can change during a lifetime, it seems obvious that there's no fixed answer. Often I think it's more useful to think in terms of motivation. What thoughts motivate you now, that you think will continue to motivate you in the long term?
__________________ Live consciously | |
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| | #23 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 89
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You should be open with us about your life is you want some genuine advice. Of course we don't want to hear everything, just what you need fixed. Saying your "life" is a bit... Without knowing you at all, I would just reply like the others. But generic advice isn't specific enough. |
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| | #24 (permalink) | |
| Member Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 42
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it is difficult to live without a purpose in fact I would like to help you I'll be back soon to give you my advices and you have the choice to accept or refuse them | |
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| | #25 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: east coast, USA
Posts: 1,407
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Getting into a relationship when you feel adrift doesn't fix the root problem. It just distracts you. You can search around to find a passion, but if you're really in a rut, you may not feel the joy in anything. Is it possible you're suffering from depression? Low-level persistent depression (dysthymia) is more common than you think. It might be helpful to share your feelings with a counselor/therapist, and get their professional insight. |
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| | #28 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 57
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Sometimes I think we over fixate on finding `meaning` in life and get overly stressed that if we don`t have a meaning we are going nowhere. But really you should find the things that feel good - whatever they maybe and develop something out of them. If you are always `looking` for a purpose but not taking steps to find out what `the purpose` may be; you`ll end up constipated. You should go out and engage with life, develop new skills, do a fulfilling hobby. Again, it should feel good and fun to you. Maybe you won`t find a purpose right away, but you`ll never find a purpose if you just don`t do anything! It takes trail and error and some time. Albeit more time for some people. Love, Light, and Sunshine |
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| | #29 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 885
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__________________ "Each film is only as good as its villain. Since the heroes and the gimmicks tend to repeat from film to film, only a great villain can transform a good try into a triumph." -Roger Ebert | |
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| | #30 (permalink) | ||
| Senior Member | Quote:
Technically your right there is no meaning in anything in life.. we assign meaning.. most things that happen on the planet our neutral.. You like a lot of us adults on the planet have gotten caught up in too much negative and limiting ideas as you have come up in the world.. take a queue/example from a 5 year old kid.. a 5 year old kid doesn't wake up in the morning and go.. There's no meaning, there's no point to do anything.. nothing is exciting anymore.. in fact the exact opposite is true.. a 5 year old kid wakes up everyday excited, enthralled and get's up and go experiences.. you were 5 years old once.. you don't remember? (and if you’re one of those that had a terrible childhood.. you'd be lying to yourself.. cause it wasn't all terrible) Quote:
One of my teachers states that it is a strange energy time.. in that we say to ourselves.. we should read this book or watch this movie or do this thing.. but instead we do nothing.. we don't do that thing we say we should do.. he says this is part of the coming shift.. If you want my opinion you have cut yourself off from your energy and you’re certainly not letting anything in.. if you don't like your purpose here on earth.. then LEAVE, you don't need to commit suicide, you don't even need LOA to do it (That will create a accident if you wish) you can just lay down, close your eyes and go.. Otherwise acknowledge you've chosen to stay.. and start looking for optimism for good feelings in the moment.. follow your EXCITEMENT.. or wallow in self pity, nothingness and obviously in your case a negative experience.. We all have the right to choose how we feel, regardless of what's been taught to us.. you are choosing this feeling take control of your reality by acknowledging what you are creating, let go and allow.. Last edited by themaster; 05-29-2009 at 01:24 AM. | ||
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| Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
| The purpose of life | newsbone | Steve Pavlina | 2 | 03-21-2009 09:06 PM |
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