is being gutsy genetic or learned ?

[lifetimelearner]

what do you guys think is being gutsy genetic or learned ?
do you either have it or don't ?
can it be learned ?

[Jarrod]

I would say for the most part learned (and consequently can be learned).

Your upbringing influences how you tend to be but you can definately become gutsier with some conscious effort.

[DerekH]

Do you think you could learn to be gutsy?

Are you asking this cause you want to be 'gutsy'?

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by DerekH

Do you think you could learn to be gutsy?

Are you asking this cause you want to be 'gutsy'?

hmmm caught me

yeh I could write a whole post about it but wanted to ask you guys that question first

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by Jarrod

I would say for the most part learned (and consequently can be learned).

Your upbringing influences how you tend to be but you can definately become gutsier with some conscious effort.

so how do you think it can be learned ?

[Starman]

Originally Posted by lifetimelearner

so how do you think it can be learned ?

Maby by practice.

We're talking about doing something risky, right?

Maby by thinking, before the act itself, what is the worst that might happen, and how to deal with it if it does happen; making yourself feel more prepared by making some preliminary plans, or contingency plans.

Then also, making sure the payoff is worth the risks. In this way, you kind of talk yourself into doing something risky but worth it, you know, building up your courage and confidence that you can handle whatever might happen.

And roleplaying the risky event in your mind, and seeing different things that might happen, and how you would deal with them.

I used to have a friend that used to say, "there's a time to play it safe, and there's a time for risky business."

[Jarrod]

Originally Posted by lifetimelearner

so how do you think it can be learned ?

Do things that require being gutsy (aka. act gutsy).

When you find something that holds you back from taking a gutsy action (like fear for example) then you work on eroding that.

Removing the inhibitors it becomes easier and easier.

[lifetimelearner]

okay uumm

I guess where I am going with this is that when I was younger I was 'gutsy'
when it came to doing things-

I would do crazy stunts on my bike ,swam in deep oceans ,jumped off cliffs into the water,swam over a waterfall and I even liked climbing on roofs and just looking out at the world

but when it came to people I was an emotional clutz and not very 'gutsy'



I remember my 3rd grade teacher gave us a test on the 1st day of school and she told us that if we didn't pass this test we would fail the whole 3rd grade

I started shaking and crying knowing my mother would 'kill' me and I wanted to confront the teacher but didn't have the 'guts'

and to this day I am the same way

except I am scared of heights now !?



so what do you think the difference is ?

[Lauxa]

Based on identical twin studies, over 50% of the variance in risk-taking behavior is accounted for by genetics.

MAJOR PERSONALITY STUDY FINDS THAT TRAITS ARE MOSTLY INHERITED - New York Times

But I still think you can learn to be more gutsy. Steve also has an audio program on it, #008 Overcoming Fear.

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by Lauxa

Based on identical twin studies, over 50% of the variance in risk-taking behavior is accounted for by genetics.

MAJOR PERSONALITY STUDY FINDS THAT TRAITS ARE MOSTLY INHERITED - New York Times

But I still think you can learn to be more gutsy. Steve also has an audio program on it, #008 Overcoming Fear.

thanks lauxa
I think I have read a study like that before
and I will go and check out steve audio

[Starman]

Originally Posted by lifetimelearner

okay uumm
so what do you think the difference is ?

Wisdom. Like increased knowledge of what happens if things go wrong, that you can get hurt permanently, or worse. Kids don't usually think in terms of the risks involved, just the fun involved. I think only later in life do they (we) think, I could have been killed doing that stuff.

I think that as adults its okay to be risky sometimes, because no risk/no gain is sometimes a very true situation.

But we just have to weight the benefits vs. risks first, that's all.

I think you still got it, but worrying about things, and focusing on the negitive outcomes more than the positive outcomes, shuts it down (gutsiness).

[DerekH]

Are you looking for permission from us that you are allowed to learn to be 'gutsy'?

Just go out and do it.

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by DerekH

Are you looking for permission from us that you are allowed to learn to be 'gutsy'?

Just go out and do it.

no not permission really

gosh how do I explain my brain

hmm

how about knowledge and wisdom from you guys to learn to speak up for myself -be more gutsy in my dealings with people
I think that is what I am looking for

and maybe even try to recreate some of the fun I had as a kid

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by Starman

Wisdom. Like increased knowledge of what happens if things go wrong, that you can get hurt permanently, or worse. Kids don't usually think in terms of the risks involved, just the fun involved. I think only later in life do they (we) think, I could have been killed doing that stuff.

I think that as adults its okay to be risky sometimes, because no risk/no gain is sometimes a very true situation.

But we just have to weight the benefits vs. risks first, that's all.

I think you still got it, but worrying about things, and focusing on the negitive outcomes more than the positive outcomes, shuts it down (gutsiness).

thanks

I believe in gaining knowledge /learning ways of improving myself
but your right
years of conditioning by my environment
have 'shut' me down

[Tilt Coach]

Actually, we are all born gutsy. When we were babies, we weren't scared to explore. We put anything in our mouths and touched anything that moved or didn't move. Everytime we failed to say a word, we had the guts to keep trying until we made it. We were never scared to look stupid. Each time we fell we had the guts try to get up without being conscious of what others might think.

Unfortunately, our guts got beat from out of us as we grew up. We were taught not to ask stupid questions. We were told to conform. We were trained to say "I can't".

So yes, we all inherited guts from our ancestors. It just got beat from out of us at home, school, and work. How does one develop guts? Answer: Get in touch with the gutsy kid that ALREADY lies within you.

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by Tilt Coach

Actually, we are all born gutsy. When we were babies, we weren't scared to explore. We put anything in our mouths and touched anything that moved or didn't move. Everytime we failed to say a word, we had the guts to keep trying until we made it. We were never scared to look stupid. Each time we fell we had the guts try to get up without being conscious of what others might think.

Unfortunately, our guts got beat from out of us as we grew up. We were taught not to ask stupid questions. We were told to conform. We were trained to say "I can't".

So yes, we all inherited guts from our ancestors. It just got beat from out of us at home, school, and work. How does one develop guts? Answer: Get in touch with the gutsy kid that ALREADY lies within you.

very cool
thanks


In

No Opportunity Wasted : Creating a List for Life
by Phil Keoghan

I remember reading a part about not' creating 'fear in his children and went on to tell about the amazing things they did because of this

[Jarrod]

Look at what stops you being gutsy in the exact moment that you are stopped (rather than guessing later)

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by Jarrod

Look at what stops you being gutsy in the exact moment that you are stopped (rather than guessing later)

okay
thanks

[legend]

I find that we all build a box around ourselves called a comfort zone....
most people will not venture to far out of their comfort zone.
The good news is that you can expand your comfort zone incrementally thus the appearance of more guts.. most people's comfort zone like most things is programed by society into us add in some unique phobias and fears and you have your degree of guts as you call it....

Now the problem you mentioned about confrontation and sticking up for oneself.....
I do not equate this with guts it is an unfourtunate learned behavior in today society.
Its not a lack of guts rather a lack of self value.....
an example..... I worked in a manual labor business I was one of the worker ants spending my days slaving away in the hot sun I thought that was all I deserved because hey I didn't have the degrees or business savoy to be the boss. I worked with a bunch of other guys who all thought the same way. Then one day they brought in a new manager you know the guy that is such an idiot and so lazy... This gave me the push I needed to realize the only thing limiting me was me..... So I realized I knew the business better then any of the managers, directors, Vp's and even the CEO and in two years time I was a director and had the sad job of letting my former boss go....

Change how you value yourself/Change your world....
there is no one any better or any worse than you
there is no one any more deserving or any less deserving than you
meditate on that/ believe it and you won't need guts to speak up for yourself

Much Love

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by legend

I find that we all build a box around ourselves called a comfort zone....
most people will not venture to far out of their comfort zone.
The good news is that you can expand your comfort zone incrementally thus the appearance of more guts.. most people's comfort zone like most things is programed by society into us add in some unique phobias and fears and you have your degree of guts as you call it....

Now the problem you mentioned about confrontation and sticking up for oneself.....
I do not equate this with guts it is an unfourtunate learned behavior in today society.
Its not a lack of guts rather a lack of self value.....
an example..... I worked in a manual labor business I was one of the worker ants spending my days slaving away in the hot sun I thought that was all I deserved because hey I didn't have the degrees or business savoy to be the boss. I worked with a bunch of other guys who all thought the same way. Then one day they brought in a new manager you know the guy that is such an idiot and so lazy... This gave me the push I needed to realize the only thing limiting me was me..... So I realized I knew the business better then any of the managers, directors, Vp's and even the CEO and in two years time I was a director and had the sad job of letting my former boss go....

Change how you value yourself/Change your world....
there is no one any better or any worse than you
there is no one any more deserving or any less deserving than you
meditate on that/ believe it and you won't need guts to speak up for yourself

Much Love

thank you
you see I knew I would get great answers by asking this question

thanks for your insight

[marinik]

lifetimelearner if I get it right, you want to be more assertive - to be able to stand up and speak for yourself and not hurt or offend others in the process?

This can be taught.

[Lauxa]

Originally Posted by Tilt Coach

Actually, we are all born gutsy. When we were babies, we weren't scared to explore. We put anything in our mouths and touched anything that moved or didn't move. Everytime we failed to say a word, we had the guts to keep trying until we made it. We were never scared to look stupid. Each time we fell we had the guts try to get up without being conscious of what others might think.

Unfortunately, our guts got beat from out of us as we grew up. We were taught not to ask stupid questions. We were told to conform. We were trained to say "I can't".

So yes, we all inherited guts from our ancestors. It just got beat from out of us at home, school, and work. How does one develop guts? Answer: Get in touch with the gutsy kid that ALREADY lies within you.

Actually, some toddlers are very shy. When placed into an unfamilliar situation or with unfamilliar people they will go and hide behind mother. Others are very confident and outgoing with strangers. This is true for other primates besides humans as well. Shyness is a genetic trait, but it is something that can be overcome to some extent with the right training.

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by marinik

lifetimelearner if I get it right, you want to be more assertive - to be able to stand up and speak for yourself and not hurt or offend others in the process?

This can be taught.

I have been to assertive training classes and I cannot seem to be able to apply the info
there has got to be a different way to incorporate this without my emotions getting in the way

thanks

[180]

It's definately learned.
Same as leadership, it's learned.

One way to become a ballsy person, is to surround yourself with annoyingly shy people. Go out to social situations and you can see how their timidness is preventing them from getting eveyrthing they want. You will find yourself stepping up and taking action and making actions for the group. You develop your role as leader and being gutsy out of necessity.

It's how I developed it. My group of friends were shy even talking to people at McCdonalds. THey wouldn't want to order food at dominios cause they didn't want to talk to the pizza guy. Fed up with their incessant weakness I started doing all the human interactions and I became a strong leader and very personable.

I got rid of the chip on my shoulder and can largely make any decesion. Like any muscle, it takes practice. For those who aren't ballsy or gutsy, it takes small steps to trying something new and different everyday.

Fear of the different prevents people from being risk takers. However, LOVING variety and difference will make you gutsy.

I love trying and doing new things. It's what makes life for me. And I've become a bigger risk taker for it. IN fact, I'm in South Korea right now and having the time of my life.

[lifetimelearner]

thank you everyone



I guess what I am trying to say is that-

deep in my core I have such a strong concept of harmony and when that becomes affected I lose my balance in the world-

-my assertiveness goes out the window

- and my emotions take over



so I have to learn techniques that don't necessarily turn off that stregnth of harmony
but have it in place and still be able to deal with the facts of imbalance in the world

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by 180

It's definately learned.
Same as leadership, it's learned.

One way to become a ballsy person, is to surround yourself with annoyingly shy people. Go out to social situations and you can see how their timidness is preventing them from getting eveyrthing they want. You will find yourself stepping up and taking action and making actions for the group. You develop your role as leader and being gutsy out of necessity.

It's how I developed it. My group of friends were shy even talking to people at McCdonalds. THey wouldn't want to order food at dominios cause they didn't want to talk to the pizza guy. Fed up with their incessant weakness I started doing all the human interactions and I became a strong leader and very personable.

I got rid of the chip on my shoulder and can largely make any decesion. Like any muscle, it takes practice. For those who aren't ballsy or gutsy, it takes small steps to trying something new and different everyday.

Fear of the different prevents people from being risk takers. However, LOVING variety and difference will make you gutsy.

I love trying and doing new things. It's what makes life for me. And I've become a bigger risk taker for it. IN fact, I'm in South Korea right now and having the time of my life.

thankyou
good technique

[Brutha]

Most things that are genetic are in someway set as default by your genes at a certain value.
Even if most people don't change the default value that doesn't mean that there isn't a way to change it. Some things are harder to change than others, but in general there isn't much that limits humans biology in the long term (maybe we even can change the genes in a few decades).

[funchy]

It could be learned, but only if the person is truly wants it and is willing to change.

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by Brutha

Most things that are genetic are in someway set as default by your genes at a certain value.
Even if most people don't change the default value that doesn't mean that there isn't a way to change it. Some things are harder to change than others, but in general there isn't much that limits humans biology in the long term (maybe we even can change the genes in a few decades).

thank you brutha
I appreciate the response

[lifetimelearner]

Originally Posted by funchy

It could be learned, but only if the person is truly wants it and is willing to change.

yeh I will agree with that


thank you