I have this belief that what I'm doing isn't important

[backpocket]

I love writing in all forms, and it really makes me feel good to do it, especially fiction and humour. But everytime I try to imagine doing it, I'll feel that what I'm doing isn't important at all.

Somehow in my mind, I'll always believe that feeding the starving kids in Africa or that helping the poor and the needy are more important, or fighting for social causes, or (insert social problem), though I know doing that full time will just make me feel depressed and bitter, and I won't be very good at it and I'll just hurt the people I'm helping. And knowing that makes me feel very selfish. The thought usually goes something like this: "Who am I to sit in a room, enjoy myself, and make a living out of it while others out there are suffering? I shouldn't be happy while other's are miserable!"

I'm trying to see through this, because I know it's just a limiting belief, along the lines of, "People should be miserable," and "We should sacrifice ourselves for others," but I can't seem to work through it though.

Any thoughts on this?

[Angela]

Try looking for your limiting belief not as something that "people should be" or that "I should be", but rather, that sounds more like:

"I am _____."

In other words, what do you really believe is The Truth about yourself? Like, "I shouldn't be happy while others are miserable, and that means that I am _____."

[striving4peace]

Pay it forward, do your bit. Think of it this way - you're sending positive, healthy vibes and efforts into the universe - I'm sure it finds it's way through the long chain of unforseeable causality to those needy and hungry people.
The Charity I volunteer, had a meeting once where their regional manager said "anything you do - whether it be healing the poor and diseased in a war ravaged country, or fixing computers of the staff that sit thousands of miles away - know that you are helping. You are one cog of a huge system and we need every little bit of effort"
So if you really want to help those in dire straits, start volunteering.

Also, mental anguish of people who come to the forums for help are also people who suffer, maybe less than the starving and diseased in poor countries.

And not to hijack this thread but: Hey angela, welcome back, were you away for a while? it's been some time since I saw you post
I had posted some threads and was hoping for input from you too.. but welcome back nonetheless!

[backpocket]

Originally Posted by Angela

In other words, what do you really believe is The Truth about yourself? Like, "I shouldn't be happy while others are miserable, and that means that I am _____."

Unimportant. Oh. So it's a self esteem issue. LOL. Thanks for pointing the way.

[wolfgang]

Originally Posted by backpocket

I love writing in all forms, and it really makes me feel good to do it, especially fiction and humour. But everytime I try to imagine doing it, I'll feel that what I'm doing isn't important at all.

Somehow in my mind, I'll always believe that feeding the starving kids in Africa or that helping the poor and the needy are more important, or fighting for social causes, or (insert social problem), though I know doing that full time will just make me feel depressed and bitter, and I won't be very good at it and I'll just hurt the people I'm helping. And knowing that makes me feel very selfish. The thought usually goes something like this: "Who am I to sit in a room, enjoy myself, and make a living out of it while others out there are suffering? I shouldn't be happy while other's are miserable!"

I'm trying to see through this, because I know it's just a limiting belief, along the lines of, "People should be miserable," and "We should sacrifice ourselves for others," but I can't seem to work through it though.

Any thoughts on this?

Maybe it's not a limiting belief but a clue as to what you want to do. Like maybe you could combine your writing with what is bothering you about the world. Write about the needy and you might help them that way. Or write about how you think you should be helping but instead are just writing about it.

[backpocket]

Originally Posted by striving4peace

Pay it forward, do your bit. Think of it this way - you're sending positive, healthy vibes and efforts into the universe - I'm sure it finds it's way through the long chain of unforseeable causality to those needy and hungry people.
The Charity I volunteer, had a meeting once where their regional manager said "anything you do - whether it be healing the poor and diseased in a war ravaged country, or fixing computers of the staff that sit thousands of miles away - know that you are helping. You are one cog of a huge system and we need every little bit of effort"
So if you really want to help those in dire straits, start volunteering.

Kinda like Marxism then. From each according to his ability, to each according to his need

And not to hijack this thread but: Hey angela, welcome back, were you away for a while? it's been some time since I saw you post
I had posted some threads and was hoping for input from you too.. but welcome back nonetheless!

Haha. Everybody loves Angela.

Originally Posted by wolfgang

Maybe it's not a limiting belief but a clue as to what you want to do. Like maybe you could combine your writing with what is bothering you about the world. Write about the needy and you might help them that way. Or write about how you think you should be helping but instead are just writing about it.

Yeah, it could be, but from what I see it's mostly a limiting belief, in that I should sacrifice myself instead of doing what I enjoy. I'll get images of myself suffering with people who suffer, and feeling miserable for people who feel miserable, because It's The Right Thing To Do. It mostly makes me feel disempowered.

If you're referencing to Steve's Follow Your Heartbreak, what really breaks my heart is to see people fighting and hurting each other because they're not aware that we're all one, or that some people believe we're sent down to earth to suffer instead of to learn and seek joy and that they have no other option but to suffer.

Basically, everything which is the opposite of my purpose: To tell the truth, that we're all one, that we're here to learn about ourselves through separation, that we are here to create the life that we want to, that nobody else can tell us what to do with our lives, where we should go, who we should meet, and who we really are, and to create moments of beauty, and to achieve that by embodying my purpose. Which is very very hard to do. I prefer to follow the positive path though, it makes me feel happier, and it makes me get up at 6 in the morning

This was all a little long winded, but oh well. Thanks for your input guys.

[Shyone]

Enjoying your life, and living it the fullest is not a crime. Enjoying your life at the expense of others is. And you clearly aren't living your life at the expense of others. So, do your best to enjoy your life, and do what you're passionate about, but always set aside time to help those less fortunate than yourself. Unless you truly want to dedicate your life to helping others, just create a balance - both give and take.

[Angela]

So, Backpocket, you have been being run by this belief, "I am unimportant," probably ever since you were a little kid when something happened, someone said something and you decided this about yourself.

Now, there is no amount of poor, hungry people you can help that will convince you that "I am unimportant" is not true, because you have been practicing believing it for so long that it really feels like The Truth to you. You are a bottomless pit and so you can't be filled up. If someone tries to convince you that you are not unimportant, chances are good that you will dismiss their opinion as unimportant. All your time is spent trying to avoid people finding out that you are unimportant and proving that "I am not important" is not true. Any efforts you make in feeding the hungry and helping the poor will feel like treading jello, because you won't get yourself any further along in feeling important.

{sigh.} But here's the good news! You have the power to remove the power "I am unimportant" has over you! There are some great ways around to help you: my coaching, Byron Katie's The Work, the Landmark Forum, EFT and TAT, and others that have been mentioned in these forums.

Can you imagine what would be possible, both in your own life and for you to generate for others, if you were not believing that thought, "I am unimportant"?

Hey, Striving4Peace -- I'm sorry that I haven't been as available as before; I've been focusing more on my coaching, creative work, vitality, and other projects. If there's something in particular you (or anyone else) would like me to respond to, would you please PM me? Thanks!

[Niamh]

Originally Posted by backpocket

Somehow in my mind, I'll always believe that feeding the starving kids in Africa or that helping the poor and the needy are more important, or fighting for social causes, or (insert social problem), though I know doing that full time will just make me feel depressed and bitter, and I won't be very good at it and I'll just hurt the people I'm helping. And knowing that makes me feel very selfish.

....

There are so many different kinds of suffering. What makes the suffering of the body (ex. starvation) more important than, say, the suffering of the heart (the loss of love, friendship, hope, etc.)? As a writer, you can do so much. Has not a story changed your life? Any text, pick your favorite..
What if Keats had decided to do something else, instead of write!? *faints* To think of it... now, thaT breaks my heart!
Offering joy, or any kind of positivity (even entertainment during exhaustion of the mind) is, in my opinion, a great gift to humanity. It's a way to connect. It's a way to say, "You're not alone. Here is my work; here I am, for you."

*for words in bold, see next reply

Originally Posted by backpocket

Yeah, it could be, but from what I see it's mostly a limiting belief, in that I should sacrifice myself instead of doing what I enjoy. I'll get images of myself suffering with people who suffer, and feeling miserable for people who feel miserable, because It's The Right Thing To Do. It mostly makes me feel disempowered.

If you're referencing to Steve's Follow Your Heartbreak, what really breaks my heart is to see people fighting and hurting each other because they're not aware that we're all one, or that some people believe we're sent down to earth to suffer instead of to learn and seek joy and that they have no other option but to suffer.

Basically, everything which is the opposite of my purpose: To tell the truth, that we're all one, that we're here to learn about ourselves through separation, that we are here to create the life that we want to, that nobody else can tell us what to do with our lives, where we should go, who we should meet, and who we really are, and to create moments of beauty, and to achieve that by embodying my purpose. Which is very very hard to do. I prefer to follow the positive path though, it makes me feel happier, and it makes me get up at 6 in the morning

This was all a little long winded, but oh well. Thanks for your input guys.

It amazes me that while believing that we are all One, you still deny yourself (in turn, US) the beauty of fulfilling purpose.

Do you want US to feel "depressed and bitter"? Do you want US to sacrifice ourselves, denying US our joy? Do you want the US in you to suffer with the US in the sufferer? Do you want the US in you to feel miserable with the US in the miserable? Do you want yourself (the US in you) to feel dis-empowered?

It breaks your heart that people believe we're here to suffer, instead of to learn and seek joy. But, right now, you're being the person who breaks your heart.
Enjoy this "separation". Enjoy it for us. The me in US wants the you in US to be at peace!

[PetraPortland]

Originally Posted by Shyone

Enjoying your life, and living it the fullest is not a crime. Enjoying your life at the expense of others is. And you clearly aren't living your life at the expense of others. So, do your best to enjoy your life, and do what you're passionate about, but always set aside time to help those less fortunate than yourself. Unless you truly want to dedicate your life to helping others, just create a balance - both give and take.

Great advice Shyone. I totally agree. Petra X

[backpocket]

Originally Posted by Shyone

Unless you truly want to dedicate your life to helping others, just create a balance - both give and take.

Yup. I should start looking into that.

Originally Posted by Angela

Now, there is no amount of poor, hungry people you can help that will convince you that "I am unimportant" is not true, because you have been practicing believing it for so long that it really feels like The Truth to you. You are a bottomless pit and so you can't be filled up. If someone tries to convince you that you are not unimportant, chances are good that you will dismiss their opinion as unimportant. All your time is spent trying to avoid people finding out that you are unimportant and proving that "I am not important" is not true. Any efforts you make in feeding the hungry and helping the poor will feel like treading jello, because you won't get yourself any further along in feeling important.

Yeah, looking back at my life, that sounds true to me. I remember doing a couple of projects early this year and eventhough I was taking a lot of responsibility, I always believed that I'm a fraud who's not good enough, and that even without me things will go fine, probably even better. In fact, most of the time I'll think of people who'll do it better than me, and it just makes me want to do even more just to prove to myself that I am important to the project. It really did feel like a bottomless pit, like I'm never contributing enough. Whenever they tell me I did a good job, I'll just think, "Yeah, you're just being nice. I bet X or Y or even Z would do a better job, in less time, with less problems. You just chose me because there's no one else around."

Originally Posted by Angela

{sigh.} But here's the good news! You have the power to remove the power "I am unimportant" has over you! There are some great ways around to help you: my coaching, Byron Katie's The Work, the Landmark Forum, EFT and TAT, and others that have been mentioned in these forums.

Whoa, that's a lot, and some I'm not familiar with. I think if I learn all of them, I can just confuse my limiting belief into disappearing.

I've read a few of the threads where you were helping some members get over their limitng beliefs, and it seems to give them some good results, so if it's possible I'd love to give it a try.

About the other methods, I'm only familiar with EFT and The Work. I've used EFT a few times and got some results, but I just can't get used to its weirdness. And I find The Work quite hard for me to do despite its simplicity. Maybe I try to overcomplicate it too much.

Originally Posted by Angela

Can you imagine what would be possible, both in your own life and for you to generate for others, if you were not believing that thought, "I am unimportant"?

I'll stop feeling guilty for doing things I enjoy, that's one. I won't avoid meeting my friends, I won't give up my plans, I'll start speaking up my mind, I won't sacrifice myself just to make someone feel better. I'll start looking for more opportunities to use my skills, I won't avoid doing things because I know somebody out there is doing a better job and I'm just a second rate hack. In fact, I'll probably even help people out more. Weird.

Ok, this list is too long, and it's starting to sound like I'm describing somebody else. But wow, the possibilities.

[backpocket]

Originally Posted by Niamh

There are so many different kinds of suffering. What makes the suffering of the body (ex. starvation) more important than, say, the suffering of the heart (the loss of love, friendship, hope, etc.)? As a writer, you can do so much. Has not a story changed your life? Any text, pick your favorite..

I never thought about it like that. Guess I believe that healing their heart, mind and spirit is a lesser task than healing the physical. I can remember times where a movie, a song, a book, a kind word, was the best thing for me and not a meal. A hunger of the soul is harder to feed than one of the stomach I guess.

About the writers...I don't know where to begin! But I do know that most of them that I've read did help me reframe some events, rethink my thoughts about the world, add some magic and adventure into my world, and at the very least, entertain me. My sister told me she used to read to escape when she was a kid, and I understand that, because unlike other mediums, you have to create the world by yourself with the guidance of the writer. And it's much more satisfying to go there, for me at least.

Originally Posted by Niamh

What if Keats had decided to do something else, instead of write!? *faints* To think of it... now, thaT breaks my heart!

Yeah, thoughts like that gives me the shivers too! What a lesser world this would be without people like him.

Originally Posted by Niamh

It amazes me that while believing that we are all One, you still deny yourself (in turn, US) the beauty of fulfilling purpose.

Do you want US to feel "depressed and bitter"? Do you want US to sacrifice ourselves, denying US our joy? Do you want the US in you to suffer with the US in the sufferer? Do you want the US in you to feel miserable with the US in the miserable? Do you want yourself (the US in you) to feel dis-empowered?

It breaks your heart that people believe we're here to suffer, instead of to learn and seek joy. But, right now, you're being the person who breaks your heart.

Yeah, I always find that what hurts me about the world is the same hurt that I'm doing to myself, and what I want for the world is what I want for me. I always forget that though.

Originally Posted by Niamh

Enjoy this "separation". Enjoy it for us. The me in US wants the you in US to be at peace!

Thank you.

[bbdream8]

Originally Posted by backpocket

I love writing in all forms, and it really makes me feel good to do it, especially fiction and humour. But everytime I try to imagine doing it, I'll feel that what I'm doing isn't important at all.

Somehow in my mind, I'll always believe that feeding the starving kids in Africa or that helping the poor and the needy are more important, or fighting for social causes, or (insert social problem), though I know doing that full time will just make me feel depressed and bitter, and I won't be very good at it and I'll just hurt the people I'm helping. And knowing that makes me feel very selfish. The thought usually goes something like this: "Who am I to sit in a room, enjoy myself, and make a living out of it while others out there are suffering? I shouldn't be happy while other's are miserable!"

I'm trying to see through this, because I know it's just a limiting belief, along the lines of, "People should be miserable," and "We should sacrifice ourselves for others," but I can't seem to work through it though.

Any thoughts on this?

You need to change your own perception and your thoughts on this matter. Why do you think that you won't be very good at helping people when you never even try? Who are you not to enjoy a life and torture yourself by thinking that with you are not worth the life you are having now as others are out there suffering? You can start small by doing charity, donating money and if you can work as volunteers to help others.

Believe in abundance. There is more then enough for everyone.

Cheers
Vincent
Personal Development Blogger

[jfrancis]

What things are important to you? If you can identify important things that need doing right here and now, that's the first step. The next is figuring out what important things can be done best by YOU, using your unique talents and personality. That may take some trial and error, but I hope you will find it an empowering journey.

It sounds selfish to follow your bliss (or heartbreak for that matter), but it isn't, really. I would argue that the only way to really give back anything worth a dime to the world is to be true to yourself FIRST! What's the point of allowing your-self to suffer to end someone else's suffering? Aren't you just creating a tragedy? By being true to yourself, you are cranking up that little generator inside of you - there is so much to give, and you don't have to sacrifice who you are to do so. You might still choose to make some sacrifices, but if you are believe in abundance, you have nothing to loose. There's nothing more inspiring than being in the presence of someone who is really doing what they are meant* to do. It's beautiful, and that's just the beginning: there's plenty more to give back, maybe in unexpected ways.

* I don't know if I like the word 'meant' here, I just couldn't think of a better one.

[CroMagna]

My parents are Africans, and I think you need a SERIOUS reality check. First of all, there are African filmmakers, lawyers, porn stars, cab drivers, musicians, fashion designers, salesmen, etc. I can name plenty of Africans in my family who have jobs that have nothing to do with helping poor Africans.
Secondly, not all poor people are nice, sweet, and noble. Some will cut your throat even if they're aware that you're trying to help them. I know someone who walked into a Brazilian favela with a bag of toys and money. He wasn't stupid, he had made arrangements with the favela community adults. The favela kids ran up and grabbed the stuff, viciously attacking him in the process, then ran off without saying thanks. He later found out that some of those kids were middle class. I know another guy who had a Brazilian maid. He didn't really need a maid that much, he just wanted to employ a poor unemployed Brazilian and give her more money than what she would make as a maid. She lived in an adjacent apartment for years. He and his wife considered her a family member. Sometimes she would arrive to the next door apartment late without any advance notice or wouldn't show up at all. It would turn out she had taken a bus to the favelas. He ignored it. Two years later, I won't go into the lengthy details, but the maid arranged to have his entire house wiped out. Every piece of furniture was gone and if you knew the details you would know the maid and two male associates were behind the whole thing.

Same with "altruists". Some of these "helping starving countries" types are nasty snobs who are doing it to make themselves look superior--at best. At worst, you have your communists and paramilitary types who will kill you if you don't agree with their vision.

Frankly, I think the whole thing is bullshhh. I don't think people can "change the world." I don't think Ghandi changed the world. I think Nehru was the force behind India's revolution and that Ghandi took all the credit because of his holy image. I think he actually even made matters worse. I don't think Mother Theresa did any good either. I think she caused people to die of curable diseases for her nasty sadistic beliefs. So I think it's all about image, because some of these "help starving countries" types are very vain and self-important. Mother Theresa cursed out a grocery store clerk for not letting her get $500 worth of food for free. A businessman in line finally had to agree to pay for the food so the line could keep moving and the noise could stop. She used to push people aside and say "I'm on an errand for the lord."

I also think the problems are too complex and large to change. Say you pass out condoms in an African village. Some woman could get beaten to death for that. Say you give a homeless guy 5 bucks. He could use it to buy drugs and then sell the drugs to others. Congrats, you just made matters worse. I think people can change INDIVIDUALS, like if they're writers, doctors, counselors, etc.

I don't think you're interested in helping people. I think you're interested in relinquishing yourself of guilt. I think you might also have some anxiety problem. Moral of the story is, like Dinesh D'Souza said about Islamic law, "forced virtue is no virtue at all."

[striving4peace]

CroMagna, I really do respect you and your opinions from what I saw you write on another thread and I hate to do a counter arguement, but I do feel like I need to clear the names of the two you mentioned.

Nehru was not the force behind India's revolution. He was also a good man, but he wasn't the great man Gandhi was. He was definately Gandhi's favourite and therefore the right man at the right time. It was Gandhi who came up with three freedom movements before the non co-operation movement won India it's freedom. Gandhi was the one who had the country in rapture, not Nehru. It was he who, though could have said but one word, and had a nation of hundreds of millions of people at the time massacre and spit out the british empires handful of rulers. But he persisted and got the independence of the country through peace, non violence and humane methods. How many countries do you know that won thier peace through non-violence? Gandhi LIVED his values and implemented them in the highese ways for the good of all. Nehru was a rich womanising oppurtunist compared to him.

Maybe it's true Mother Teresa was rude to a business man. I don't know, I haven't followed her story as much. But then almost all great people leave behind a glossy legacy bigger than life, and nobody remember the crap about them that they did while they were alive that made them human. Einstein, kennedy, Martin Luther King Jr. - we all remember the greatness about them.
But they're remembered for a reason - for what they DID accomplish and stand for. Nobody's perfect. You could just as well rise to be someone who leaves a powerful legacy tomorrow - but are you perfect? Nope, and neither is anyone else.
But those guys are remembered not just cos they tried to change the world, but because they succeeded at it. Mother teresa may have been rude to a few businessmen but the millions in calcutta and the country got the help and charity they needed thanks to her and her inspiring ways.
Yes, not all africans are poor. Not all poor people are nice - good points and a fair reality check. However there are poor people in horrible circumstances who do need help. And nice or not, everybody deserves love and kindness, even if they don't know how or just prefer not to recieve it or give it in return.
The attitude of 'it's no point, people are **** so why try' is not productive at all. It's what freud believed till his death too, so i'm not saying its an invalid perception - i'm just saying it's not a productive perception. Based on that each person cannot believe in their ability to be better either. For as Gandhi himself said - be the change you want to see in the world. I mean if nobody else can change then why should I? How can I?
Whether someone distribute condoms in an african village or won't - the point is he/she tried to improve the living conditions of the people there. Which is a lot better than the tonnes of guys doing nothing about it. Sure, execution is where it gets jacked.
But then like a med student will tell you - intention is not enough, you need to know how to execute correctly to be able to heal someone.

[Eisho]

Originally Posted by backpocket

I love writing in all forms, and it really makes me feel good to do it, especially fiction and humour. But everytime I try to imagine doing it, I'll feel that what I'm doing isn't important at all.

Somehow in my mind, I'll always believe that feeding the starving kids in Africa or that helping the poor and the needy are more important, or fighting for social causes, or (insert social problem), though I know doing that full time will just make me feel depressed and bitter, and I won't be very good at it and I'll just hurt the people I'm helping. And knowing that makes me feel very selfish. The thought usually goes something like this: "Who am I to sit in a room, enjoy myself, and make a living out of it while others out there are suffering? I shouldn't be happy while other's are miserable!"

I'm trying to see through this, because I know it's just a limiting belief, along the lines of, "People should be miserable," and "We should sacrifice ourselves for others," but I can't seem to work through it though.

Any thoughts on this?

Different people have different callings. Yours happens to be in writing. That is your passion so stick with it and enjoy it. When success comes you will be in a position to help those that have a passion for charity work and in turn they can help the more needy. Look at what JK Rowling has done for single mothers!

For you to ponder:

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

- Marianne Williamson

Cheers,

Eisho

[backpocket]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

My parents are Africans, and I think you need a SERIOUS reality check. First of all, there are African filmmakers, lawyers, porn stars, cab drivers, musicians, fashion designers, salesmen, etc. I can name plenty of Africans in my family who have jobs that have nothing to do with helping poor Africans.

I'm aware of that, it's just that when I was pondering why do I have this belief, I thought to myself, "Man, I sound like those beauty pageant contestants who always want to help the Africans," so somehow the word Africans just slipped in when I was writing. Didn't mean to offend you or anyone.

Originally Posted by CroMagna

Secondly, not all poor people are nice, sweet, and noble. Some will cut your throat even if they're aware that you're trying to help them.

I don't care if they're sweet or noble.

Originally Posted by CroMagna

Same with "altruists". Some of these "helping starving countries" types are nasty snobs who are doing it to make themselves look superior--at best. At worst, you have your communists and paramilitary types who will kill you if you don't agree with their vision.

That's true.

Originally Posted by CroMagna

I don't think you're interested in helping people. I think you're interested in relinquishing yourself of guilt. I think you might also have some anxiety problem. Moral of the story is, like Dinesh D'Souza said about Islamic law, "forced virtue is no virtue at all."

Yup, I do. I feel guilty of having a lot and seeing others have less, and I also feel guilty that I can be disgustingly happy and others are struggling, and I'm still working on it. Which is why I created this thread, to help me overcome any false beliefs I have, because I know I'm ignorant and most of my thoughts weren't chosen by me and have lodged themselves in my cranium and made me think they're the landlord and I'm the one paying the rent.

It's also useful posting it on a public forum like this because then I can have point of views I've never considered before, and my thoughts and beliefs dissected.

[Revolution]

The more HAPPY, ENLIGHTENED people there are around - the better. Enlightenment knows no bounds, no fear, no limitation - no deficiency.

Once, a long time ago the illusions of the world had become too much for me. I was walking along thinking of the nearest window to jump out of - thats how devastated I was. But I briefly met an extroadinary person that day. A very brief encounter but it was like nothing I had experienced before. This stranger before me had so much love and respect for me it was amazing. It was like he was talking to God when he spoke to me. And even though my life kind of sucked I thought Jeez if everyone was like that the world would be okay - it would be fine. I got to know this person - and I saw what he did for people and I noticed how he never took credit for it. Somehow the greatest person I ever met but also the most humble.

But this person who could easily be likened to Christ was perhaps not what you might expect. A very funny, lighthearted person, nothing could sway him, - he seemed to always know exactly what to say, what to do, where to go. It was impossible not to like this guy (except through jealousy). But, I assure you he was quite wealthy (wealthy in EVERY way!). He dressed well and lived very well and never seemed to be unhappy or phased about anything.

Unfortunately, I can't claim to have met many people like that. But I have on the other hand met MANY charity workers - (often hardcore Christian types.) They seem to believe that suffering or "working hard for the Lord" is the key. There are many quotes and stories in the Bible that speak of charity and the like - and some have clearly modelled their lives based on these principles.

All I can say is that the first kind of person is fun, inspiring and uplifting to be around whereas the second kind is rather dull, boring and depressing to be around. [How can you give what you don't have?]
Furthermore, the first kind of person really operates with pure motives straight from the HEART whrereas the second kind often has alterior motives - like guilt, fear, good karma, getting to Heaven, looking good in front of others and more.

The recipient of the help often KNOWS the difference. When someone is helping you because they actually WANT to help you that is a beautiful thing. But when its done for other reasons it doesn't go down so well.

I think you really need to think more about what service really is.
I won't try to preach to you but here are a few things to think about:
1. I have seen many people who are poor and destitute and these people almost always have one thing in common - low self-esteem.
2. Everyone has created their lives - including those that are born into tough circumstances.

I guess the moral of the story is - don't fall for the low-level-consciousness light-worker trap - ie. helping others at the expense of yourself. And also there is much more to help than simply handing out money.

Don't get me wrong - I think charity is great - but as Shakespeare said: "There are more things under Heaven than are dreamt of in your philosophy"

[backpocket]

That could be a possibility. I grew up as a Muslim, and looking back I see that I was constantly preached that suffering is good, that I'm here to help others first, that I should feel guilty for feeling good, that the rich and successful people are out to destroy us and don't give a damn about us, that I should strive for heaven first and that earth is just temporary. In short: I'm not here to feel good, I'm here to suffer and sacrifice myself so that I can be rewarded in the afterlife.

I've left my religion a few years ago because I just couldn't stomach it anymore, the message stopped resonating with me or it never did but I never stopped to notice. I guess the conditioning is still there and I've never noticed it. Conditioning from the mainstream media could've contributed even more to it, with its constant images of war and suffering and everytime there's one there'll be a fundraiser and they'll do those stupid songs and guilt trip us into giving.

[funchy]

Life is short. Write because you ENJOY writing. Don't overthink things. Just live in the moment and enjoy your creative talents. As long as in your heart you desire to help those around you, it will happen naturally.

Who knows? You might publish a book that really changes people lives. You might publish something that earns you money, which in turn can be donated to a charity of your choice. You never know what wonderful places your talents can take you!

[Revolution]

Originally Posted by backpocket

That could be a possibility. I grew up as a Muslim, and looking back I see that I was constantly preached that suffering is good, that I'm here to help others first, that I should feel guilty for feeling good, that the rich and successful people are out to destroy us and don't give a damn about us, that I should strive for heaven first and that earth is just temporary. In short: I'm not here to feel good, I'm here to suffer and sacrifice myself so that I can be rewarded in the afterlife.

I've left my religion a few years ago because I just couldn't stomach it anymore, the message stopped resonating with me or it never did but I never stopped to notice. I guess the conditioning is still there and I've never noticed it. Conditioning from the mainstream media could've contributed even more to it, with its constant images of war and suffering and everytime there's one there'll be a fundraiser and they'll do those stupid songs and guilt trip us into giving.

Great post backpocket!

Yep, I thought this kind of mindset was mainly due to Christian programming but you have alerted me to the fact that Islam has a similar model. [This is one of the reasons why I discourage people from persuing religion and sometimes actively speak out against it.]

Having once been a hardcore Christian myself, I have noticed that even years after giving up the dogma, that there still seemed to be some nonsense ingrained in my subconscious. For one thing, I had an unreasonable fear of darkness and the occult and another thing was I often felt guilty for even the slightest indulgence on my part.

I've honestly spent years purifying my mind and ridding myself of all the fear-based programming.

If you honestly desire to be a better person, life will show you the way - but be prepared because sometimes the lessons are neither easy nor pleasant. I believe God speaks to us in many ways - but chiefly and most importantly through feelings and experience. This is why its important to get out of the mind and into the now where you are more aware of present-moment feelings.

Having said all that, I think everyone of us is different and not all of us necessarily feel the need to have a great amount of money. So if you find yourself not desiring great riches - then it doesn't necessarily reflect a limiting mindset - we're all different. I personally feel most comfortable with a modest amount of wordly possessions - but I don't feel guilty about what I DO have!!! - At least not anymore!!!

I hope this helps bring more clarity to your situation !! and I think your open-mindedness, humility and sense of humour are great tools to have on the road to self-discovery!

Blessings!

[Revolution]

Originally Posted by backpocket

That could be a possibility. I grew up as a Muslim, and looking back I see that I was constantly preached that suffering is good, that I'm here to help others first, that I should feel guilty for feeling good, that the rich and successful people are out to destroy us and don't give a damn about us, that I should strive for heaven first and that earth is just temporary. In short: I'm not here to feel good, I'm here to suffer and sacrifice myself so that I can be rewarded in the afterlife.

I've left my religion a few years ago because I just couldn't stomach it anymore, the message stopped resonating with me or it never did but I never stopped to notice. I guess the conditioning is still there and I've never noticed it. Conditioning from the mainstream media could've contributed even more to it, with its constant images of war and suffering and everytime there's one there'll be a fundraiser and they'll do those stupid songs and guilt trip us into giving.

Great post backpocket!

Yep, I thought this kind of mindset was mainly due to Christian programming but you have alerted me to the fact that Islam has a similar model. [This is one of the reasons why I discourage people from persuing religion and sometimes actively speak out against it.]

Having once been a hardcore Christian myself, I have noticed that even years after giving up the dogma, that there still seemed to be some nonsense ingrained in my subconscious. For one thing, I had an unreasonable fear of darkness and the occult and another thing was I often felt guilty for even the slightest indulgence on my part.

I've honestly spent years purifying my mind and ridding myself of all the fear-based programming.

If you honestly desire to be a better person, life will show you the way - but be prepared because sometimes the lessons are neither easy nor pleasant. I believe God speaks to us in many ways - but chiefly and most importantly through feelings and experience. This is why its important to get out of the mind and into the now where you are more aware of present-moment feelings.

Having said all that, I think everyone of us is different and not all of us necessarily feel the need to have a great amount of money. So if you find yourself not desiring great riches - then it doesn't necessarily reflect a limiting mindset - we're all different. I personally feel most comfortable with a modest amount of wordly possessions - but I don't feel guilty about what I DO have!!! - At least not anymore!!!

I hope this helps bring more clarity to your situation !! and I think your open-mindedness, humility and sense of humour are great tools to have on the road to self-discovery!

[inquiringmind4u]

Originally Posted by backpocket

The thought usually goes something like this: "Who am I to sit in a room, enjoy myself...,

If you could do just this much (and I mean actually do it) you would be doing far more for the good of humanity than any "feed-the-children" organization has ever accomplished.

In one way, you could literally reduce all of the world's problems down to a single cause, which is the fact that virtually no man (or woman) on earth has discovered how to sit alone in a room, with nothing to do, and be perfectly content with their own company.

Thoreau once wrote, "For every one person striking at the root of evil, there are a thousand striking at the branches." The only thing save-the-________ organizations can do is strike away at the branches of the problem. Feed a million starving children this year and there will be a million to feed next year. And that's because the problem (whatever it is) originates within the individual.... you and me. Until someone begins working there, at the root, the cycle of oppression-and-relief will live on unceasingly, just like the seasons.

The truth is that there are deplorable conditions (and actions) on this planet because you and I are the way we are, moment-to-moment. There is no other reason.

For example, take terrorism. Well, first I should be clear: By "terrorism" I mean real terrorism... not the kind that governments stage to keep their citizens in fear. I mean the real deal. The actual hatred of another group of people.

Surely that is a very isolated circumstance... caused by misguided fanatical beliefs in some radical religion or culture. But am I truly innocent in the matter? Do I play no role?

At one point in my life I would have said, "You better believe I'm innocent. I've never hated another group of people at any point in my life." But then as I started to look closer, I was surprised (shocked) to see something I wasn't expecting:

Terrorism was actually playing itself out in all sorts of ways in my individual life... where I was the terrorist. Here's one example:

Have you ever been cut off in traffic by someone who, for whatever reason, had absolutely no regard for you or your safety? If so, what rushes through you when that happens?

Hatred does, doesn't it? And when it surges inside of you (if the conditions are right) wouldn't you agree that that hatred has absolutely no regard for that other person. If it could have its way, it would see that the other person is crushed, or at least pained in some way. We've all done this one way or another.

Now, if we look really, really closely at that hatred and compare it to the terrorist who wants to inflict pain on another group of people, is there any difference at all in its quality?

There isn't. It's exactly the same hatred. There may be differences in the physical outcome of what that hatred "decides to do", but the hatred itself is exactly the same.

When that hatred is given control of my faculties, and, in this example, I do something to get back at the driver who cut me off, my action is quite literally the cultivation of all terrorism everywhere... because it is the cultivation of terrorism itself.

The terrorist cell that causes the deaths of thousands of people is simply the accumulated result of billions of people all over the world caving in to hatred within themselves day after day after day.

Anything that manifests in society is the result of the actions of all individuals compounded daily.

By now you're probably wondering, "Where the heck is he going with all this?"

If your path through life in one way or another helps you to transcend this hatred within yourself (hatred is just one example, it could be some other dark condition) then no matter how selfish it may seem to you or to others, it has done something truly good for the entire world.

Fortunately, in the end, it makes very little difference what you choose to do in the outer world because transcending our interior limitations (transforming our consciousness) is what really we're here to do. And no matter what you choose to do, whether it's something you love or something you believe is your duty, you will be brought face-to-face with those limitations over and over again.

Hope that helps a little.

[ar81]

Importance is very relative.
You may think that to be important you need fame or fortune, or to be in history books.

I recall an elder writer who taught me about writing. He was diciple of a famous writer but he was not famous himself, but he left a trace in my soul, a trace of goodness and compassion, as he was like a grandpa. So he achieved something that not a president or a famous character have ever done. He will be remembered in my heart. And that makes him more important than a world leader.

I once met a famous director/producer from BBC and he was a cool guy, a great human being, despite of being very famous. He is also human and he wants good things for the world like any human with a good heart.

So behind the mask of fame, the mask of media legends, you have normal people who do things, who live their lives and do the best they can to live and find some meaning.

I would not care too much about how important it is. If it makes you happy, it is important.

Probably you can't change the orbit of Earth, but you can do good things around you. Be an activist. Media tells you you can't change anything, but even when you open a door, you are changing the world. Change is a matter of doing someting in the same direction during enough time.

Once I was told that teaching a kid younger than 12 to pilot a spacecraft in Orbiter (see my sig) was impossible. I did it. The daughter of a neighbor, was 7 and she was on national TV because of that. Teachers from Canada, UK amd USA told me it was impossible. I did not understand why it was impossible, and therefore it was possible when I did it.

People do not change the world because they go from work to home, and they do not spend time in the middle to change the world. Some get discouraged with the first obstacle.