Channeling Anger

[dECLAN]

Part of being human is experiencing anger. I am of the school that believes anger should be expressed rather than being denied as a 'negative' emotion.

My question is how do YOU deal with situations in the present where you can't exactly say excuse me while I do a work out or go off and punch my pillow?

Most people (including myself) don't fully deal with the situation AS IT OCCURS but would rather let it take us over (or run away) without integrating it afterwards.

What are some easy ways of channeling anger in the PRESENT moment before it has a chance of becoming repressed or denied?

[ÜberDan]

Hi dECLAN,

Great question I've been thinking the very same thing recently.

What I have noticed for me is that there are times when I can feel anger and am detached; meaning I am aware and can observe it and from this change my perspective on it's origin thus removing the need for anger or from observing letting it subside. This is a very recent practice for me.

I also beleive in experiencing the full range of emotions and sometimes just go with the flow of the emotion but still being mindful of it's consequences and repurcussions, obviously your direction for this emotion is very important. Some may say this is a destructive emotion I would also partly agree with that too.

What I struggle with is when you get hooked by the emotion and are not in a position to observe and detach, that I don't like. Recently there was a situation where I'd had a long day hadn't eaten for over 6 hours and had to deal with several unhelpful people, one situation after another. I got hooked by angry emotions and my blood boiled, not nice for me or them. In retrospect this could be synchronicity at work, my internal emotions and state either attracting or manifesting in the physical world.

[ReallyGoodIdeas]

Difficult question! I've found when i get angry I tend to start speaking very clinically to people to ensure that the communication is clear. Weird, but sometimes it works. Somehow it also expresses my anger, because normally my words just bubble out incoherently! :-)

Joy to you
Hazel

[skydust]

it is a great help in general to start observing your emotions. you could start with the easier ones, like boredom, annoyance and curiosity, then you can move up to the more challenging ones like anger and fear.

what i do is whenever i get an emotion, any emotion, i feel it in my body. where is it located? is it in my solar plexus, my heart, my throat, etc. what shape is it? is it round and fluffy and blue, or sharp and pointy and red? what thoughts come with it? (the trio of emotion, thoughts, body. pay attention to one and you can change the others, as they all influence eachother) you get the idea.

its a game of observing. when you do this, you realise its just a feeling, it comes as from nowhere, and dissapears into nowhere when it goes away. it is not you. you disedintify from it. its just there, it doesnt take over you anymore. it becomes a sensation. with practice, you can snap out of any emotion in the present.

its also ok to not be able to snap out of it, its best to just observe in the beginning, you are not trying to change anything or stop being whatever you are feeling, that happens by itself when you observe it.

[dECLAN]

Originally Posted by skydust

its a game of observing. when you do this, you realise its just a feeling, it comes as from nowhere, and dissapears into nowhere when it goes away. it is not you. you disedintify from it. its just there, it doesnt take over you anymore. it becomes a sensation. with practice, you can snap out of any emotion in the present.

its also ok to not be able to snap out of it, its best to just observe in the beginning, you are not trying to change anything or stop being whatever you are feeling, that happens by itself when you observe it.

Thanks for that helpful bit of information.

When I experience anger it is easy to forget that it is just a feeling being experienced in the body to an external situation and is not actually the real me.

I really like the idea of observing the reaction as it happens rather than to the actual event (or person!) that is causing it and then disidentifying from it.

[skydust]

you're welcome declan, im glad you found it helpful.

just to clarify, nothing 'else' is 'causing' our emotions, we are responsible for our emotions as we are the ones who are adding meaning to the event / person in forms of emotions and thoughts. we need to realise that we are not victims to outer happenings, but that we can consciously choose at any moment in which way to *respond* to an event in order to best serve our purpose in that moment. note its respond, not react.

it all takes time to develop, and i am by no means an expert, but this is what works for me.

[dECLAN]

I go along with what you are saying about nothing out there can really cause me to feel anger unless I choose it to and again I appreciate your insight.