Self image problem

[ABdude]

Ever since I was very young I have always seemed to have a problem with my self image. I used to always say to myself "I am so ugly", or "I have no friends because nobody likes me", or even sometimes, "No girl will want to go out with an unattractive guy like me." Since I began my quest for self improvement two years ago, I have made a lot of positive changes and my general self confidence has improved dramatically. However, small pieces of the old me still exist and surface from time to time, and lately I cannot help but feel like I am the reincarnation of the Elephant Man.


The worst thing I have a problem with, (aside from the female factor, which I will not get into this time), is that I have a really hard time seeing a pictures of myself or seeing myself on TV, for whatever reason. Its like as soon as I see myself, I feel completely hideous. I used to have a problem looking in the mirror, but lately I have been able to overcome that. Besides, I found out the hard way that its better to use a mirror for shaving.

Now here is what I cannot figure out. I have had members of the opposite sex look at my pictures and their responses have been from "Ugh", to "Wow!" So, short of having a hundred supermodels come up to me to tell me I am gorgeous, (which may not even work, although I would be extremely flattered), is there any way I can learn to accept who I am physically while at the same time work on looking my best?

[Alison Jenkins]

It sounds as though you are suffering from body image distress. I work with a lot of people who suffer from this. You might want to start by taking a body image distress test to see if this is the case and if so how severe it is. There is a great workbook at the end of the page Body Image

Alison