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08-02-2008, 02:25 AM
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 Friend's mind abducted by "sect-like" P.D group. I am not sure this is the right place to post this. Maybe it belongs in Social and Relationships, move if needed... About a year ago, a friend joined a personal development "group".Their program is based on Law of Attraction, clearing unhealthy patterns through rebirth sessions. The personal coach who designed this program is quite famous and very successful, with many enthusiastic followers. I read the information on the website, it made sense and was interesting, very much like the sort of stuff people on this website believe in and are interested in. It all started with a rebirth session over a week-end, and included sharing one's feelings,problems, losses and deepest thoughts with a group,often it involved getting up on stage. That's all I know. At first, my friend who had had very bad times in her life and was searching for answers, felt great and emotionally healed.She was very enthusiastic , proclaimed( and seemed) to be happier, emotionally healthier. We don't live in the same country but we emailed quite often, more and more her emails became less personal and more about the "program" she had joined, how much I would benefit from it, how much she loved me and couldn't wait to see me again and take me to a workshop with her. She is the sort of person who needs to worship ideas or people, so it didn't seem very strange coming from her. I was happy she had found her bliss, whatever it was. I was under the impression that she had found support in that community and was also building a career through coaching others and becoming more and more involved in that "group". Her sister, who is one of my best friends ,spend a one week holiday with her and came back very alarmed. This girl has tried to proselitize her and her boyfriend as well as their other sister. Today, she sent my friend's kid information about the "program", about breathing and law of attraction. He is 12 years old. She was one minded about her mission of recruiting people to attend these "workshops" and spent the whole vacation trying to convince everyone involved that they had patterns that needed to be addressed and that all their problems would be solved by joining the program. That's all she talks about. What is alarming is that she is very agressive about it, becomes withdrawn at times and very sad and dismissive when she is "processing" the sessions or materials of this "program".She has become a "coach" for them but is not making money out of the program. She is broke, alone because she has alienated everyone she knows, lashes out at her family and friends who do not agree to attend the workshops or happen to not be interested in the beliefs of her group. I did a research on the net and found nothing negative about the program she joined. It looks like any P.D coaching. I do find alarming that she has spent a huge amount of money for the workshops but is "coaching" for free to attain a higher position and gain consideration from the "group". People who care about her are very alarmed that she has now turned to proselitize the kids. She is struggling financially and seems to have bouts of depression admitting feeling alone when people do not agree with the views of the "group".This is far from the prosperity and emotional stability and bliss she claims to have found thanks to this "program". We see the extent of the negative consequences of her involvement in this program, but we have no idea if this due to the program or her taking the teachings too far. She has always been very intense. She acts and talks like someone who has joined a cult and has been brainwashed, rehashing the teachings of this program word for word and having lost her judgement. The program is very expensive and seems to be a pyramidal organization, but I can't be sure about it. How can one determine if there is any danger? The more she isolates herself, the less she can be helped. She takes her son to these "meetings" and her sisters and family are starting to be scared... Any word of wisdom welcome.      |
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08-02-2008, 01:56 PM
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| I don't think that it is healthy to totally depend on some program or guru. You probably can't do much by email to broaden her view. If you gave the name of the group or the coach, maybe someone in this forum can tell you more about that group.
__________________ I am always open for feedback on my posts. That might focused on the argument at hand or on my writing style. If your feedback would go offtopic feel free to send me a Personal Message. I don't believe in Beliefs. |
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08-02-2008, 04:18 PM
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08-02-2008, 10:13 PM
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| I know I cannot do much to help via email, and many people who are close to this person feel powerless. At the moment, no one can determine for sure if the group has brainwashed this girl. She does act like someone who has been brainwashed, but no one knows who's responsible: is this girl taking P.D teachings too seriously or is she manipulated as a marketing tool? Is the agressive marketing strategy a result of her out of proportion enthusiasm or a scheme on the part of the group? It would be premature to point the finger at the group and name it. It's based in Canada. I would be interested to know about people who have had similar experiences. |
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08-02-2008, 10:25 PM
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| In other words, you refuse to state the name of this "famous and quite successful coach" who designed this system that has you so alarmed that you write a rather long post about how your friend's life and future may be in danger. Are you trying to protect this coach you've never met, or are you trying to better understand your friend? Hmmmmmmm.
__________________ “There never was a winner who wasn’t at some point a beginner.” - Denis Waitley |
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08-02-2008, 10:44 PM
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08-02-2008, 10:52 PM
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At the moment he just wants a answer based on his observations and don't want people to jump in and defend the group based on the reputation of the coach/group.
__________________ I am always open for feedback on my posts. That might focused on the argument at hand or on my writing style. If your feedback would go offtopic feel free to send me a Personal Message. I don't believe in Beliefs. |
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08-02-2008, 10:58 PM
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__________________ “There never was a winner who wasn’t at some point a beginner.” - Denis Waitley Last edited by seeker5 : 08-02-2008 at 11:01 PM. |
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08-02-2008, 11:01 PM
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If it turns out to be Charles Manson's tentacle group, or a group of HelloKittyists, I might have some other things to add.  |
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08-02-2008, 11:36 PM
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| Are rebirthing sessions just breathwork sessions? I'm unfamiliar with the term rebirthing. If it's breathwork, I'm ok with that -- a very powerful transformer. What do you consider expensive? Spending $2000-3000/yr is not expensive IMO. $10,000 a year, or thousands for one class I would consider crazy expensive. Proselytizing? Let me introduce you to some Christians I know. Sometime's when people think they've found the cat's jammies they have so much joy they want to share it with everyone. Sometime's people are also brain-washed crazy too. You have to use your intuition on that. LOA, as I've seen it talked about here and also from books I've read, still has some major denial in it and I wouldn't pay money to have someone teach it to me. It won't harm anyone, just frustrate you to hell.
__________________ --There's nowhere to go, nothing to do. My blog which I haven't updated in a long time. |
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08-03-2008, 01:02 AM
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| If she is brainwashed, she won't be able to hear criticism of the group, not until she is ready. If you try to push the issue, she may push you away, the group may encourage her not to associate with non-members. I think you should be supportive and try to build up her self-image, when she is strong enough she will be able to leave the group if it is a negative influence. Agree with Dharma on proseltyzing, I think most people want to share when they have found something that helps them on some level.
__________________ ~Lauxa~ |
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08-03-2008, 10:34 PM
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| I know it is quite frustrating not to know the name of the group mentioned. I want to be fair on the people involved in this group who are, like my friend, involved in it for the best of reasons and with the best of intentions,and on my friend who doesn't know about our worries and could possibly be alerted if I ventured to say something. Thank you for people who replied without knowing much. After doing a research on that group on the Net, I have found nothing alarming, no negative comment. My guess is that they have a very aggressive marketing strategy and that their negative impact is on the pocket book, primarily, and not on the mind. Yes, my friend is an adult, therefore there is nothing anyone can do to help. She has reached financial rock bottom, her family is helping a bit. Most of the people who care about her are far away therefore it's difficult. I agree that many religion proselitize to children and adults alike, and that many beliefs can be used for better or worse, depending on the interpretation of the converted. What is frightening is the fact that this person pretends she is getting prosperity and emotional stability when she actuallly is getting quite the opposite. She has good intentions and wants the best for herself and others. It pains me to see that unscrupulous business people use this to make money. I apologise if I was overly dramatic in my first post, but I am quite concerned. |
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08-04-2008, 01:15 AM
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__________________ I am always open for feedback on my posts. That might focused on the argument at hand or on my writing style. If your feedback would go offtopic feel free to send me a Personal Message. I don't believe in Beliefs. |
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08-04-2008, 01:27 AM
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08-04-2008, 05:08 PM
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| I grew up in a fundamentalist Christian household, and when I left organized religion altogether, I looked for what was essentially the same thing anywhere I was, whether it was PD or even just plain agnosticism. If you can't find anything negative about the group (that is, they didn't tell her to proselytize), then maybe she is just trying to find security. You did say she tends to worship things. One thing you could do, if you really think you should invest yourself in this, is be slightly interested. Take her brochures, try to ask the right questions, and be respectful of her cult in the meantime. If she doesn't feel threatened by your attempts, she will probably be more likely to open up. Unless this group really is a cult. Then you should probably run far, far away. |
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08-04-2008, 05:26 PM
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| Who is it? I don't know any of the really famous one's that force anyone to listen to their teachings... Isn't that what brainwashing is? If she's doing it to herself, it sounds like more of an addiction. Who is the famous person or group? Is it scientology? If it is, she's in trouble. They find every way to get you under their thumb with contracts and constant pressure. They'll financially ruin her if she ever leaves... |
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08-04-2008, 06:07 PM
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| Not to mention, that sometimes, we need to have a good brain-washing to wash our brain of a bunch of crap that's quite harmful. 
__________________ “There never was a winner who wasn’t at some point a beginner.” - Denis Waitley |
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08-04-2008, 08:56 PM
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| Ask her to read "A Piece of Blue Sky", available free online. Some of you other folks might enjoy it too.
__________________ Martial Arts for Personal Development Blog |
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08-04-2008, 09:34 PM
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