Personal Development,- really development ?

[bronxr]

Hi people I have these ideas recently and experience with PD, spituality, psychology and so on.
In personal development and similar areas was noted work of increasing awareness of self of the world

around us and so on. But increasing of awareness work not as it should I think, for me at least.

For example when I study all these teachings about how people are creating hell for themselves by

attachments and about real self and about concepts- I dont know why this shaken me so much, maybe I

stareted to think and wonder too much about everything. My view is that this works for me as a lenses on the

camera when you focus on particular distance you see other distances blurred and not clearly. The same ,

when I analyze actions of people by my knowledge in psychology and so on I become be detached from their

actions and think oh how are they stupid, stressed and I dont know what. I loose attachment I take not

things so seriously, I have no attachment desire, I see not point in things what they require after me. And here

is the point of ego I think, It is absolutely necessary in this society where are requirements and models of

behavior. So from one point of view there is the point in all these teachings but they take me away from

necessities of day and allow me step back but on the other hand they take away deepness, the attachments,

the desire, the concentration. It creates somehow next layer of consciousness and this consciousness

creates new thoughts momentum and patterns of thinking.
And this can also decrease happiness from the small things of life cause always thinking about bigger picture

and not seeing that small clearly.
And again Personal Development can take away normal happiness cause always pointing to where you want to

be and what you want to attain not enjoying present moment present living always looking for what you want

always living for future. I think that LIFE is development in itself, natural development not forced but

molding according present and natural desires and requirements of person. No special abracadabra or magic

formula. What you want and interests you works and evolves itself naturally, no suffering,just enjoying all the

way. And I think that for this, all that was reading all those personal development, spiritual , psychology

informations created more sadness, more confusion, more living for future, more not accepting where I am,

and created more thinking and philosophizing how to hack this life haw to be better than others and less doing

and less doing.