I need to let this out.

[LMVector]

Hello. I've decided I need to get this out in writing, and then maybe I can get to the root of things, alone or with anyone's help if people are willing to offer any.

The past 6 months have been very significant to me. I decided it was time to put some changes in place. My two main goals to start with were to lose weight and to raise my grade average. The term is coming to an end and my grade has come up considerably, and I've lost 10kg so I'm pleased with the results. However, as I'm fighting the last battle for just now (last few exams, two weeks of school, 4kg to go to my target weight) I feel pretty crap. I will admit, the past months haven't been a smooth ride- I've had my fair share of screw ups regarding eating and studying and a few minor breakdowns- but I've come out from them all and kept on progressing. For the past couple of days I've felt depressed, tired, lazy, unable to go out running (something which I normally enjoy), craving sugary foods in large quantities etc. Today however, I woke up really down, felt down all day for apparently no reason, broke down crying a few times, I have no appetite and my stomach hurts.

I don't know where I'm heading with everything. I just feel disorientated and I have no idea why, because I'm doing well and I have a great summer to look forward to. I still have that belief that I'm going to get through this alright, but I just keep asking myself why? Why do I HAVE to get out of this alright? Why do I HAVE to do anything? Or better said, why do I WANT to do anything? Where is this all going for me?

Thought vomit over, I think.

[Trezker]

Only two weeks more. You can do it!
You have the rest of your life to think about why, so just push through.

If you don't feel like running, go for walks. If you're gonna be thinking about why a lot you might as well do it on the move.

[The Cloud]

You're breakdowns are because you are fighting everything you want. You're fighting your grades to get them to be high, you're fighting your weight to get it to be low. Because you are fighting, in your mind you have created two opposing ideas; good grades and bad grades, fat and thin.

Because you have created these opposites in your mind, both are part of you. Thus, when you are more "Good Grade Thin LMVector," you are fighting against bad grades and fat. However, "Good Grade Thin LMVector" cannot exist without "Bad Grade Fat LMVector." So sometimes you are more "Bad Grade Fat LMVector," who loves sugar and TV as opposed to vegetables and books.

So why do you have to get out of this alright? You don't. That is just the perspective you created when you made "Good Grade Thin LMVector." Instead of trying to get out of it alright, remember than in and out are the same place, and it is only your perspective that differentiates "Good Grade Thin LMVector" from "Bad Grade Fat LMVector." If you stop creating enemies, then all the world will be your friend.

[LMVector]

The Cloud:

Thank you, what you are saying is making a lot of sense to my situation. Can I ask though, what would the ideal solution be? Do I need to identify myself more with "Good Grade Thin LMVector" ? Or just let things be? I understand your analysis, but I can't grasp the solution.

Thanks again.

[Dannyboy1]

Realize and be proud that you can make decisions and win out over your emotions, your fears, your body. You've beaten all of them. You and you alone are in control of your decisions. You're not just an animal controlled by base instincts. This is why you will be able to accomplish whatever you want in life. Very few actually accomplish what you have. Very few have the will you have.

[uberinquisitive]

Originally Posted by The Cloud

Instead of trying to get out of it alright, remember than in and out are the same place, and it is only your perspective that differentiates "Good Grade Thin LMVector" from "Bad Grade Fat LMVector." If you stop creating enemies, then all the world will be your friend.

Wow, that is totally profound, The Cloud!

***

My suggestion is very practical:

Do TAT procedure about how you feel today. You feel broken, you feel tired, you feel horrible. Just feel it and do the TAT procedure.

You should only do about 20 minutes in the actual TAT pose per day, but this should really help.

There is something deeper than a diet or studying that's causing this meltdown. TAT (and EFT and BSFF) all try to get to the core, but TAT is definitely the easiest and most intuitive method.

Then, maybe in a few days, why don't you download the TAT for Weight Loss Program. I wrote a reply to someone's thread here about my experiences and results. It's been pretty profound.

[Ryan24]

Take an honest look at your situation and realize that there is no such thing as a "bad" or "wrong" thing in your life. Merely a certain lifestyle you have now that will bring you a certain type of life in the future. If that is not what you wish for the future, implement changes as peacefully as you can.

A significant amount of energy will be spent contemplating why things are so "wrong". If you eliminate that concept from your mind, you will be free to progress forward.


Best wishes-Ryan

[LMVector]

Thanks for the advice everyone-

I had a shot at TAT (using the first technique on the website) and found it pleasant and actually effective.

I've also taken a step back and looked at what's actually going on. I feel like my perspective was just all broken up before, and the reality is I am "Good grade thin LMVector". I just need to let her be her. Maybe I was scared of success in a way before.

Best wishes to all,

Mel

[The Cloud]

Originally Posted by LMVector

Thanks for the advice everyone-

I had a shot at TAT (using the first technique on the website) and found it pleasant and actually effective.

I've also taken a step back and looked at what's actually going on. I feel like my perspective was just all broken up before, and the reality is I am "Good grade thin LMVector". I just need to let her be her. Maybe I was scared of success in a way before.

Best wishes to all,

Mel

This is why I didn't answer you before; because any answer that you arrive at will be infinitely truer than the answers I could give you. You create your own reality in the way you see things, and then you live in it. You know that now, and you can be as you wish.