Patience & Suffering

[Jeri]

I have been truly suffering from a broken heart for almost 4 years. In all of this time I have taken action to make a lot of personal changes and have sincerely grown and changed to become a better person. However, I still find myself asking "Why me?" I have been having a lot of trouble accepting the circumstances in my life (since I lost a lot more than my relationship). I also lost my home, my job and almost all of my life's savings! Blah blah blah...

Anyways, the reason why I am writing this post is because I had an amazing discovery this past week that relates to patience and suffering. It has helped me to understand the meaning of "Let go & let God" I am NOT religious but I do believe in a divine being or energy. And the story I am about to share comes from the Old Testament.

Has anybody here ever heard of the Book of Job? It is a biblical story about a man who suffered greatly and had to endure painstaking patience. This story changed my life! I have known about patience but have never been able to put patience into effective action. However, this story helped me to clearly understand the importance of faith and patience and the Power of Divinity. I hope others will read it and maybe we can have a discussion about it. Either way - if you find yourself lacking in patience or feel as though you are suffering for NO reason and just need a little help getting through it - this is the STORY for you!


The Book Of Job - Introduction


Let me know what you think - it's a little long but if you feel you are suffering and don't know why - this story may help you!

Sincerely,

Jeri



Blog | Words In Action - A Website to Inspire Change

[uberinquisitive]

To me, the book of Job makes a clear distinction between pain and suffering.

Pain is inevitable - you lose your job, your health, your love, someone dies, etc.. Of course you will feel negative emotions! Of course you will feel unhappy and pained!

Suffering happens when you resist what has happened. You think, "this is unfair!" or "this can't be happening to me!" Basically, suffering is the proverbial salt being rubbed on the wound. Suffering is purely optional and unnecessary. It's a layer YOU put on top of the original pain.

When Job accepted the situation (by accepting God's will), he stopped suffering.

For me, this book is NOT about patience. It's about acceptance and surrender.

That is the basic message of the story: sh*t happens. What goes up goes down. But inevitably, it goes back up again. Life is just like that. Once you accept that, then you can prepare for the inevitable upswing. If you fight the fact that you have sh*t on you, then you just prolong the downswing.

Some people find a lot of solace in God. And they accept life's lot in the name of God's will.

I am not religious at all, but I deeply commend anyone who accepts and surrenders to life's ups and downs. If God helps you do that, then thumbs up to God!

In Jan. 2007, my fiancé committed suicide. Within 10 days of his suicide, I lost my job, career, home, money, everything, etc.. I wasn't invited to the funeral. I never had a chance to say good-bye. All my dreams were destroyed overnight.

For me, I found acceptance and surrender through therapy, alternative healing, books, seminars, etc..

It took about a year for me to accept and surrender. And guess what? Once the suffering was gone, I realized that the pain was also gone. Pain, it seems, doesn't last a long time at all.

Job is restored to his former happiness when he stops accusing God, and just surrenders to life. When he surrendered, his suffering disappeared. Once he stopped suffering, the space his suffering took up became "free." And so, he was able to fill it up with renewed happiness.

If he didn't give up the suffering, there would have been no space for a new life.

So, again, in closing:

I don't think the story of Job is about patience in suffering. It's about acceptance of pain, so you DON'T suffer anymore.

[garentee]

Uberinquisitive,
Sorry for your loss. Glad to hear that you have started to heal the wound. Best G

[uberinquisitive]

Originally Posted by garentee

Uberinquisitive,
Sorry for your loss. Glad to hear that you have started to heal the wound. Best G

Thank you.

Once I stopped suffering, I was able to truly heal. The suffering served only to re-open the wound again and again.

I finally had ENOUGH. Patience is NOT a virtue when it comes to suffering.

One of my goals is to help those who survive the suicide of a loved one. I was very lucky in that I had resources and support.

So many people carry the wounds for 5, 6, even 10 years or more. Psychologist classify surviving a loved one's suicide on the same traumatic level as surviving a concentration camp. There is PTSD, feelings of survivors guilt, etc..

So many people believe that they have to endure suffering. Almost like, they deserve it. Or, it's a badge of honor. That is builds character.

If I had decided to keep suffering, how could I possibly help others? Suffering shrinks your world. Acceptance and surrender expands it. No one benefits from your suffering, absolutely no one.

This isn't to say that I don't feel pain. But pain feels different. It definitely does NOT feel like suffering.

Over time, pain fades. Suffering seems to linger on and on and on.
Pain comes and goes. Suffering is on 24/7.
Pain is about the event. Suffering is about you.

[sonicpunk32]

Originally Posted by uberinquisitive

So many people believe that they have to endure suffering. Almost like, they deserve it. Or, it's a badge of honor. That is builds character.

I think suffering is a sign that you are off your path in life. When you are on your path, you dont suffer at all.