What makes you feel excited?

[Spartan]

Interesting post Playlife. When I first started uni I felt like a complete extrovert. I felt free of anxiety for the first time in my life. Although I think that was just a temporary thing associated with the newness of everything, since I have settled back into a more reserved type personality.

Out of interest, where did you meet the girls you hooked up with? Was it in a club or bar, or was it from your course or an extracurricular activity? And were they seriously up for a no-strings attached encounter (being in a sober state)?

[Plato]

I have a theory that the extroversion you felt was actually a result of you being forced to do something that scared you and therefore using your courage. I remember that too when I first started- meeting so many new people forced me out of my shell. And that's as true today as it was then, because it still requires some courage to talk to randomers.

We need to put ourselves in postions that demand we use courage for best results I think, because with the option to turn back it's a matter of will power to push beyond fears and that can only work for a short while unless we gain momentum or transcend the fear. It's so easy to collapse back into the shell though. Burning the ships is the only way...

As for girls, I met them everywhere I could summon the courage to meet them. And yes, if you behave the right way and give out the right intentions a lot of girls want no-strings sex at least as much as we do. Realising that was a massive turning point for me, and it wasn't an academic realisation, it was empirical evidence placed before my eyes so often I couldn't deny it.

[Spartan]

Originally Posted by Plato

As for girls, I met them everywhere I could summon the courage to meet them. And yes, if you behave the right way and give out the right intentions a lot of girls want no-strings sex at least as much as we do. Realising that was a massive turning point for me, and it wasn't an academic realisation, it was empirical evidence placed before my eyes so often I couldn't deny it.

Nice. I don't care about loads of girls though, I am past caring atm to be honest. I just go about my life trying to concentrate on academic, fitness and employment goals. I keep telling myself a girl will come along one day. I have perhaps lost courage and confidence in that aspect of my life. If I can appear 'normal' in front of most girls, I am usually happy lol.

How old are you btw Plato? Did you go to college? If so, what did you study?

[PerDev]

Friends with Extreme Sense of Humor excite me ..

[sonicpunk32]

I remember when my mom bought me my first ever video game and system, a Playstation 1, back in 1998. The music of the games, the graphics of the games, the technology in general, the fantasy worlds they created. It wasnt so much that I liked to game, I was in no way a gamer, I was just in it for escaping reality. It was a very exciting time, it was like I was in heaven, and I was feeling a sort of bliss flowing through me. All from a video game. I didnt notice at the time, because as I look at the very same PS1 console in my closet today, nearly 10 years later, the blissfull exciting feeling is gone. But boy, if I could get that feeling back, I'd give anything to go back.

[Trezker]

Originally Posted by PerDev

Friends with Extreme Sense of Humor excite me ..

Friends who randomly makes up crappy jokes are awesome. Far fetched and nerdy jokes are the best.

[Brenden9904]

I found you're post on google because I have the same problem. My personal research to the problem has come up with some scrambled results.

I have symptoms of ADD, social anxiety, and some stuff that makes my head sweat a lot. The head sweating can be a symptom of hyperhidrosis or associated with something wrong with my Sympathetic Nervous System. Ever since a kid I've had a huge problem with social anxiety, talking to girls, or just people in general. With this came a huge lack of confidence, which demoralized my soul for a long ass time.

But also, I'm never happy to do anything. I remember when I was a kid how excited I would get over playing games, or going to my friends, going on a camping trip etc. This doesn't happen anymore and it's hard to say exactly why. But here's some food for thought:

You're on the right track when you mentioned something about having a lack of connection between neurons; I've read much the same. There is a thing called Emotional Intelligence, and Intelligence Quotient (IQ) If you have a high IQ and a low Emotional Intelligence, you're life will generally be a mess with lack of direction, etc. But if you have a high Emotional Intelligence and a lowish IQ (non-retarded low), you're probably just normal.

Tenth grade I was transferred in to a continuation high school. I live in the Poway Unified School District of California and some of the schools here are the best in the state; they therefore have higher standards. I never did my homework, I couldn't register anything my teacher was saying in class, and I was always late or never at school. Before transferring me over, they gave me a REAL IQ test from a counselor. I scored above average, with extremely high marks in writing (yes, despite my poor grammar skills). So what was wrong with me I wondered? They told me I was lazy.

People with a lack of emotional intelligence respond to a situation by thinking about it, those with a high emotional intelligence respond to the same situation instantly, based on how their body's feel about the situation. You're body does everything on it's own and it's all way more natural. The more you think about doing something, the more apt you are to psyche yourself out of doing it. This is my problem, I sometimes can't even talk when in a larger group of friends or at a party.
Also, note that when you're disgusted, your nose wrinkles and you're eyes almost close as you pull you're face away from what's in front of you. This blocks all your senses that make you feel disgusted. When you're scared you're eyes widen giving you a better view of your surroundings. etc etc. These are examples of Emotional Intelligence.

I know I have social anxiety, but I don't like the medicine they gave me. I know I have ADD but I don't like the Ritalin they gave me. I get ****ed up on drugs, liquor, and weed often, don't even get me started on Xanax abuse. But even I can't bring myself to become dependent on a prescription drug just to feel normal.

But now it's time for me to provide my solution:
I'm not there yet, but I'm still working on it too!
Learn to find some confidence. You can not force happiness upon yourself, it come's only naturally through emotional intelligence. Confidence, however can be learned, easily, or not easily, it can still be learned by ANYONE. There are some good guides online, I suggest finding all of them and reading about them and trying them. Having a lack of confidence does nothing good for you, getting confidence has potential to make your life better. First, you'll feel better about yourself, and you will become more successful. More successful with women, money, life, happiness, sports, everything. It's mostly about just talking to yourself in a positive way instead of putting yourself down all the time. I don't put myself down with words in my head such as, "you're not good enough", I put myself down by not doing something that I am scared of doing, which is telling my body that I am not good enough.

I hope this long scrambled post wasn't too much to read and I hope that if you can relate to how I feel, then you can find a solution. Good luck!

[Elrond]

Originally Posted by Angela

There is no 'base level.' The joy available to us is infinite. I mean that in a practical, achievable way, nothing whooo-whooo about it.

I like your thinking

[ar81]

Between 15 to 22 years I suffered depressions very often. I later discovered that chemical changes during that age causes that. Darn chemistry.

[Revolution]

I believe that the more freedom you have - the more joy/excitement you will feel.

I also like Steve's advice: do something that you are afraid of. Thats what pushing yourself is all about. But choose the activity with wisdom by all means.