Laughter is the Best Medicine: Note from Mr. Hill

[bellemeadows]

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and
preferred to get in and get out. Equally, unfortunately, my wife is like
most women ---she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the
following letter from Wal-Mart.

Dear Mrs. Hill,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been
forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr.
Hill are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance
cameras.

1.June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people' s
carts when they weren't looking.

2.July2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.

3.July7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.

4.July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
'Code 3 in House wares. Get on it right away'

5.August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on
layaway.

6.August 14: Moved the 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7.August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other
shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets
from the bedding department.

8.August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying
and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9.September 4th: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
mirror while he picked his nose.

10.September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked
the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming
the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

12.October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna Look' by
using different sizes of funnels

13.October 18:He hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed by, he yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14.October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

and last, but not least

15.October 23:Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile,
then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!

[Marco Polo]

I have the habit of laughing sohard that my whole torso starts aching... not sure if that's prolonging my life or not...

[Chado2423]

This has got to be a joke.

[Dannyboy1]

Originally Posted by bellemeadows

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and
preferred to get in and get out. Equally, unfortunately, my wife is like
most women ---she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the
following letter from Wal-Mart.

Dear Mrs. Hill,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been
forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr.
Hill are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance
cameras.

1.June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people' s
carts when they weren't looking.

2.July2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.

3.July7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.

4.July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
'Code 3 in House wares. Get on it right away'

5.August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on
layaway.

6.August 14: Moved the 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7.August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other
shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets
from the bedding department.

8.August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying
and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9.September 4th: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
mirror while he picked his nose.

10.September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked
the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming
the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

12.October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna Look' by
using different sizes of funnels

13.October 18:He hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed by, he yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14.October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

and last, but not least

15.October 23:Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile,
then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!

I love it! If he could get that video tape, he'd make a million dollars on the internet. I'd pay to see some of that stuff... and I get paid to tell jokes on stage!

Very funny!

[bellemeadows]

Originally Posted by Chado2423

This has got to be a joke.

Yes, this is a post which I thought might be humorous for folks. Sometimes, laughter is the best medicine.

Blessings, Belle,

[Alison Jenkins]

Laughter certainly is the best medicine. Has anyone watched that film about a guy who becomes a Dr and makes everyone laugh. I can;t think of the name at the moment but it is so funny as it shows how even seriously ill people can feel better when they laugh.

I love to laugh. My biggest problem is stopping my laughter as once I get going it is infectious and I really can't stop! It's great to laugh at the funny side of life. The other day I took a friend to my son's swimming lesson, the funny thing was I was a bit early ....... like a week early. Instead of getting cross I just had a good laugh about it and how my habit of being early seemed a bit excessive!

Alison