should I quit school this semester for my sanity?

[lightthecandle]

I've been having a really tough time this semester and I'm not sure if I should take a leave of absence(leaving this semester with all Withdrawals (W's) . I'm especially concerned because last fall, I took a leave of absence and I don't want grad schools to look at this and not admit me to their programs in the future (2 years).

I feel like if I don't leave I'll get a D and a B and another B in my other classes.

but if I do leave right now, I could get treatment (psychological) and make myself better, sooner.

I don't know what to do...help!

I only have a week to decide

[actualize81]

Hey man,

Your psychological health is very very important. Take care of yourself. School can wait. I was always worried about "the future" and "how things look." You come first. Your wellness and health always. I didn't follow this because a part of me was always running from my issues. I even ran away from taking appropriate care of myself. It's a choice I would love to take back..

Also, I'd advise you to check out my website, it does deal with various psychological issues and ways to resolve them. Look for the post about EMDR. Eternal Hope It's a very powerful technique to release emotions stored in you from your childhood.. Good look man...

Email me if you want to talk @ actualize81@gmail.com

[m18pak]

Light, I can't really give you any advice since your situation is uniquely unique and only you, being in it, will really know how to handle it, but I do want to say one thing and I ask you to consider what I say without taking any offense, because I mean none.

Light, you seem to me like you're starting to get very unstable and imbalanced. I get the impression that you're coming apart at the seams because you're feeling like you can't cope with your current situation, and you're starting to 'panic' slightly (or a lot). You're thinking in extremes and overreacting, to put it one way. I'm worried that you will actually quit school and try to throw yourself whole-heartedly into "making myself better, sooner" and then you're really going to be in trouble. You're going to make matters worse for yourself if you try to devote all your time and energy into healing yourself, because judging by your current state of imbalance I'm presuming you'll try and force progress, and when that doesn't work you'll be more depressed than ever.

I don't really know how to say this, but you are not balanced. You overreact to the slightest little things. Your dissatisfaction with life is so great that it's turning into depression. You're...you're basically trying too hard because you're desperate, and you're desperate because you're imbalanced. I don't know if that makes sense but I don't really know how else to say it.

Look, I appreciate how you must feel about yourself and your life; in fact I know exactly how you feel because I've been there. You feel that things have got to change, and that's good, but you're trying to create change in an extremely unbalanced way, and that's not good because all you're doing is hurting yourself while getting nowhere. Your discontent with how life is is not creative discontent, but destructive discontent, depressive discontent. You say that you spend 95% of your time daydreaming about how you would like things to be and how it's making you utterly miserable. Can you not see why you do this? It's good and all to try and improve yourself and your life, but not to try to do it in an unbalanced way.

There's a parable about how once upon a time there was a farmer who was impatient with how slow his crop was growing, so one day he went down into the field and started pulling on them upwards to "make them grow faster". The next day he went down to his field and his crops were all dead.

What I'm trying to say is because you're so imbalanced you can't see how you take your actions and thoughts to unhealthy extremes to try and force growth and improvement. my advice is that you need to just CALM DOWN before you think about doing anything else.

For example, could you not just drop one class to make your workload more bearable? try a more moderate approach?

Did I make sense? I mean, I don't really know how to get my point across...

[lightthecandle]

Originally Posted by m18pak

Light, I can't really give you any advice since your situation is uniquely unique and only you, being in it, will really know how to handle it, but I do want to say one thing and I ask you to consider what I say without taking any offense, because I mean none.

Light, you seem to me like you're starting to get very unstable and imbalanced. I get the impression that you're coming apart at the seams because you're feeling like you can't cope with your current situation, and you're starting to 'panic' slightly (or a lot). You're thinking in extremes and overreacting, to put it one way. I'm worried that you will actually quit school and try to throw yourself whole-heartedly into "making myself better, sooner" and then you're really going to be in trouble. You're going to make matters worse for yourself if you try to devote all your time and energy into healing yourself, because judging by your current state of imbalance I'm presuming you'll try and force progress, and when that doesn't work you'll be more depressed than ever.

I don't really know how to say this, but you are not balanced. You overreact to the slightest little things. Your dissatisfaction with life is so great that it's turning into depression. You're...you're basically trying too hard because you're desperate, and you're desperate because you're imbalanced. I don't know if that makes sense but I don't really know how else to say it.

Look, I appreciate how you must feel about yourself and your life; in fact I know exactly how you feel because I've been there. You feel that things have got to change, and that's good, but you're trying to create change in an extremely unbalanced way, and that's not good because all you're doing is hurting yourself while getting nowhere. Your discontent with how life is is not creative discontent, but destructive discontent, depressive discontent. You say that you spend 95% of your time daydreaming about how you would like things to be and how it's making you utterly miserable. Can you not see why you do this? It's good and all to try and improve yourself and your life, but not to try to do it in an unbalanced way.

There's a parable about how once upon a time there was a farmer who was impatient with how slow his crop was growing, so one day he went down into the field and started pulling on them upwards to "make them grow faster". The next day he went down to his field and his crops were all dead.

What I'm trying to say is because you're so imbalanced you can't see how you take your actions and thoughts to unhealthy extremes to try and force growth and improvement. my advice is that you need to just CALM DOWN before you think about doing anything else.

For example, could you not just drop one class to make your workload more bearable? try a more moderate approach?

Did I make sense? I mean, I don't really know how to get my point across...

I didn't take your advice the wrong way, and I think you're completely right.

I just don't want to hurt my GPA that's all.
I honestly don't know what to do...should I leave school or shouldn't I? I can't drop any one class, because its too late, so the only option I have is dropping all my classes or sticking it out. I already have an F in one of my classes this semester (because I thought I could get away with the W but then it was too late to drop , so now I have an F)

[oberlee]

Lightthecandle...

I think this depends on a few things.

1. Do you know what you want to do with your life?

2. How far through college are you? First year? Second? Almost finished? Is this a sudden change? If you're almost finished, were you fine the first few years and then this came on, or has it been like this all along?

3. Do you parents have any input on this? Are they a source of pressure or support?

4. Did you go to college straight from high school? (It sounds like yes, but I wanted to make sure.)

If you're in college just because that's what you do (why I went), then it might be really hard to get motivated. If you know what you want to do and you're in the right place to do it but have these feelings, that's a different emotion holding you back than being in a position where you don't know what you want in the first place.

Taking time off is always good. The reason I'm not advocating that outright, however, is because I have a friend who was depressed and took time off about 3 times before graduating, but I think she was worked up about nothing, to tell you the truth. She's now in art school. And she's almost 29 and still is as flighty as ever about herself.

I went for a semester abroad, and it was the best (well, second best) decision of my life. It changed everything, whether I realized it right away or not. But it gave me the space and freedom from regular school without dropping out.

[supertom]

As long as you dont stick around in your city and do the same stuff minus school

[Trezker]

Don't worry about school. Take care of yourself first.

School means learning without pressure, if you feel pressure in school something is very wrong.

[ken nubo]

Do it, sounds it would help you immensely in the long run.

[lightthecandle]

Originally Posted by Trezker

Don't worry about school. Take care of yourself first.

School means learning without pressure, if you feel pressure in school something is very wrong.

I feel soooo much pressure...and for absolutely no reason.

if I do decide to stay this semester these will most likely be my grades: D, B, B, F or I could take a leave of absence...but I already took a leave of absence fall semester of last year!
I've been crying everyday for the past 2 weeks, and can't make it go away. I just don't want to leave this semester, and then have it back fire on me in the long run and never get into a master's program for psychology.


I really don't know what to do

[Spartan]

Originally Posted by lightthecandle

I feel soooo much pressure...and for absolutely no reason.

if I do decide to stay this semester these will most likely be my grades: D, B, B, F or I could take a leave of absence...but I already took a leave of absence fall semester of last year!
I've been crying everyday for the past 2 weeks, and can't make it go away. I just don't want to leave this semester, and then have it back fire on me in the long run and never get into a master's program for psychology.


I really don't know what to do

So you take psychology; perhaps then this spell of 'imbalance' will enable you to relate better to future patients if you decide to become a psychologist or therapist etc. Just think how unempathetic you would be to patients if you had an easy ride your whole life.

Also, perhaps being in an environment consisting of constant psychological analysis is making you over analyze your own psychological state?

But yup life is hard!

[Dharma]

Originally Posted by lightthecandle

I really don't know what to do

Take a semester off; hike the Appalachian Trail.