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03-14-2008, 01:35 PM
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 Chad, I really hope you're able to get the support you need. It will pass though, if you let it. J x
__________________ Amnar: Experience it. In These Heels? - Life, the universe and writing. Do you know where your towel is?      |
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03-14-2008, 02:44 PM
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| Chad - thanks for letting us know where you are. I'm sure it's very difficult, but it's good to hear you're getting support.
__________________ "no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should" -- Desiderata by Max Ehrmann  http://www.happyfornoreason.com/home.asp |
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03-14-2008, 03:20 PM
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 Live for others Life is more valuable ,cheer up man,just if u don't want to live for yourself live for at least one person in this world, who ever it might be your mother,father,friend,lover .enjoy this life by being purposeful ,u don't no value of your's ,if u really know that ,than u must haven't come to this stage,your here born in this world to be and stay purposeful,if u feel that your not useful for yourself than use your life for bringing happiness into the life of some other person , help orphans ,blind people ,mentally disabled persons ,u have everything eyes,hands and legs and u still don't find the purpose of using them ,remember about hellen keller,a blind women she gone blind at the age of 10 and after which she survived even though she couldn't communicate with her ears and mouth ,only with her hands she communicated with the world and created miracles and u have everything ears,mouth,hands,do at least one thing which brings happiness in other persons life Swami Vivekananda ,saint from India said that ,THEY ALONE LIVE WHO LIVE OTHERS ,THE REST ARE MORE DEAD THAN ALIVE. LIVE for others than u will see all the happiness in your life,practice meditation because that is the only thing a person can offer himself as self help and it can cure any kind of disorder or problem. cheer up man ,there is lot more things to be done ,just not ending your life without making all these is a foolish thing. |
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03-14-2008, 04:10 PM
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| I was thinking about you yesterday and wondering how you are doing. I hope that you can get some serious therapeutic help. Don't give up Chad, you can get through this! |
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03-14-2008, 04:36 PM
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| ^^^Thank you honey bees.^^^ Whatever I am going through is more than a challenge or a battle. It all began when my ex-girlfriend broke up with me. I've undergone extreme anxiety and just can't seem to find any normalcy to my life. My life has become an utter living wreck and perhaps I am to blame, or perhaps I have had a medical condition I was unaware of until things triggered things in me that were just being supressed (repressed, whichever.) I pray every day that I'll be getting better but it seems that things have gotten worse. I have been unable to find and keep a job for very long. The job I do have frustrates me because i feel as though I can't function there. I've seemed to have lost all meaning and all purpose to my life. i pray daily to no avail. And it appears that no matter what I do, see the doctors talk with people, or whatever nothing seems to be helping me. If I have a rare condition I just hope it is treatable, except the problem is this, I can't afford the bills I have by going to see the doctor. I thought I was doing well when I first moved up her, but that's when I had hope of reconciling... that dream is gone. How could a peron live his whole life in normalcy and then breakdown like this. I have developed tics which I haven't had before in my life, and everything is just not as peachy and rosy as it used to be. I just want all of this to be gone. The pain is so unbearable and it freaks me out even more that I have this pain and the anxiety worsens. I feel like I am dying, but I don't really want to die. But if I can't take care of myself I'm going to die aren't I? Whatever happens I just hope its somethign that helps me. My family doesn't believe me about the tics, and I am falling apart. I have obsessive thoughts about my ex. I miss her, and love her. And I spent time stalking her, not that I want to hurt her or anything. I just wanted to try to mae peace with her, but she didn't want that, so I fell apart. I don't even comb my hair. I'm a total wreck, and a mess of a person. I try affirmations but they don't work. I try medication which sometimes works and sometimes doesn't. I'm tired of complaining of the same thing, but it's just that I don't know what to do. My pastor is coming over this afternoon to visit me. I'm a mess and I NEED help. Not only do I want help, I NEED help. Somebody help me out of this terrible whatever it is!!!!!!! |
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03-14-2008, 05:01 PM
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| Chado, I've been in similar shoes in the past 2 days. Have you read Eckert Tolle? His concept of the pain-body may really help you. To heal the pain body, Tolle writes: Quote:
I'm not saying this will make everything totally ok. But hopefully, it will take the edge off the pain. It's helped me. |
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03-14-2008, 05:08 PM
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| Chad, as everyone else here, I really hope that you get the help you need and you are able to find some new found faith and joy in life. One thing I've learned, that's not always easy to do, is to try to look at the positive side of your struggles. Look at all the pain you've gone through and try to see if there is anything positive that has come out of it. An example that I've done is I used to over-analyze everything. I would think about things, life, the universe, philosophy, religion until it hurt my brain and my heart so much I wanted to just end it. I didn't think there was a purpose to life or to anything. This overthinking and constant questioning eventually turned into me finding the answers that I was looking for and surrendering. I've now turned what used to be a weakness and something I tried to repress into a strength. I can now see the depth of things and appreciate them. Try to see the light in this, now matter how much darkness there is. I wish you the best Chad. =)
__________________ Illuminated Mind - The less boring side of personal development. Subscribe: http://feeds.feedburner.com/IlluminatedMind Twitter: http://twitter.com/jonathanmead |
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03-14-2008, 05:15 PM
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| Despite of whatever reasons, if you look back and reflect on your life, you have a lot going for you. Reflect back on the happy times you shared with your friends, family and love ones. A world without you would be different. I want you to think about that carefully. Around the world there are stay-at-home-moms who feels they are not contributing to the world. They feel they are not part a greater good in the world. They feel they are living an uneventful life. Same day again and again, the never ending boredom and nothing to look forward too. Our History are filled with great thinkers and inventors, great leaders and great people, athletes and musicians, etc... These great people wouldn't be and achieve their best for was it not their mothers. Sometimes we think our existence in this world as of nothing and we are not contributing or making a positve different. Our own simple existence has a big impact in this world whether you know it or not. I can list countless impact you have contributed in this world: -the love and happiness of your parents the day you were born -the friends who you made them smile on a troublesome day -the stranger who you inspired simply because you gave them your smile -the lover who fell head over heels and feels that you are so wonderful -the timeless laughter you shared with a love one -the little kid,nephew,niece,cousin who looks up to you -the people who didn't get to meet you, yet you gave them your kindness Whether you know it or not, each and one of us are a valuable contribution this world  Have this prayer for her.
__________________ Self Improvement Tips  Success is Consistency of Purpose, Personal Development & Actions. |
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03-14-2008, 06:18 PM
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| I live by the rule that "Any day above ground is a great day". We are so lucky to be enjoying a human experience, as we are spiritual beings that get to enjoy this human experience for just a blink in time. Gratitude is the key. Be happy and grateful for what you have and you will get more to be grateful for. Might I recommend watching "The Secret", this will show you the power of your negative thinking and what it is doing your success. YOu can do it, if you choose to. |
Travis Wright | |
03-14-2008, 06:23 PM
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| "I am willing to release the patterns that are creating the resistance to the good that I deserve." Louise Hay |
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03-14-2008, 09:35 PM
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| I feel like I am searching for help, but no matter who or what I turn to there seems to be no end to the problems that have presented themselves into my life. Quote:
On a side note, I used to feel comfortable being around people. But lately not so much. I exhibit anxiety around people so much not knowing what to do in any situation. Last edited by Chado2423 : 03-14-2008 at 10:52 PM. |
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03-14-2008, 09:54 PM
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| You're in a cycle of resisting and at the same time fueling the thoughts that keep you feeling depressed, obsessive, etc. I have not gone quite as far or as long as you in a cycle like that, but I've done my share. The biggest help is to think thoughts that feel good when you think them. Or at least better. In one of my threads Angela mentioned this is not "Positive Thinking" in the sense of deluding yourself with false happy-happy-joy-joy statements. Rather things like: Quote:
I think the biggest thing you can do is to short circuit those awful thoughts, by thinking and speaking to yourself about them differently. Accept where you are and think the next thought that gives a little relief. Every bad thing passes just like every good thing does. Just like with some other people in my life I wish I could snap my fingers and make everything okay for you, but really that would be robbing you of one of the greatest opportunities you have! The sweetness that comes from providing for your own well-being cannot be matched. And believe me, I have obsessively constant thoughts too. I encourage you to do The Work (Byron Katie) -- call one of their facilitators if you can...pretty sure it's free. Keep seeking help. Try new or different medications maybe. But most of all don't give up. I do believe that some people have a harder time "feeling good" than others. For some it seems to come easy. Maybe it's a real physiological difference. But I believe we are all perfect too and it's possible for you to overcome this! At least know that so many here care. I love you very much and I am praying for you, sending lots of love and peace and very sure that you will make it. And I can't wait to see what you will accomplish with all of the insight you will have gained.
__________________ I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies. This is the dawning of the rest of our lives. --Green Day The more I see, the less I know, the more I'd like to let it go. --Red Hot Chili Peppers |
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03-15-2008, 05:00 AM
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| Chado, keep breathing. Remember what the counsellor taught you. And pay attention to the space between two breaths. |
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03-15-2008, 06:15 PM
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Quote:
("I feel bad right now, and I'm ok. -- I'm ok, and I have the tools to feel better on purpose when I'm ready. -- When I'm ready, I'm really pretty powerful. I will be ready when I'm ready. I look forward to that." You know, which is quite different from, "I feel good! I have what I want now! Things are peachy!" ) I am going to pu that quote on my refrigerater. Who cares if my parents see it, right? Quote:
Last edited by Chado2423 : 03-15-2008 at 08:11 PM. |
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03-15-2008, 07:40 PM
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03-15-2008, 08:51 PM
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| Well, maybe that's your issue. You're waiting for it to be "taken care of," as if somebody else is going to come in with a psychological wrench and fix your brain. You're the one whose thoughts are destroying your life. You're the one whose beliefs are making you anxious. You are the one choosing to be miserable. And you are the only one who can do otherwise. Drugs may help, but in the end all they'll likely do is numb the pain. The damage is still there, you just won't feel it. So go ahead and keep going like you are. None of us are hurt much by it. We have our own lives, and most of us realize that there is a lot of joy to be found in living. You are the one who thinks life sucks. You are the one refusing to question yourself, your thoughts, your beliefs. You are the one who doesn't care to explore why you are feeling this way. No skin off our backs. If you want your life to end, that's your decision. None of us are going to make it for you, because we know better, because we value our lives. This value wasn't handed to us by a psychologist in a bottle or on a couch. It came through a lot of hard thinking, through asking a lot of hard questions and getting a lot of hard answers. It doesn't come from somebody handing you a bag of value, it is something you have to find inside yourself. But only if you care to look.
__________________ We must conquer ourselves, and allow our selves to conquer the world. |
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03-15-2008, 11:53 PM
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I'm not asking for a magic pill. Quite the contrary. I never used to think my like sucked. I used to believe it was wonderful, exhuberant, and joyful just the same as you do now. I've been asking tough questions, the only thing is that I am not getting answers which is why I feel so trapped, as if no end or a way out of this depressive episode of my current life. Who knows in a year or so, maybe I'll be back on that other side of the fence. I'm trying to figur out what to do about the problems I am facing... not a pill, not a couch... but A SOLUTION! |
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03-16-2008, 12:18 AM
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| Chado, you keep talking as though you're gonna find THE SOLUTION outside of yourself. But it looks to me (and I think The Cloud is getting this impression, too) that you're currently completely and utterly unwilling to take responsibility for the (sinking) boat you're in. We here, and therapists, your parents, your ex-girlfriend, all of us -- we're not going to provide you with an answer. You want to find an answer that works for you, you're gonna have to ask yourself some difficult questions; you're going to have to summon up some courage. So far, you have not asked yourself any tough questions -- instead, you've bemoaned your fate and complained that nobody is providing you with what you want. You can keep doing that, of course, but you can see that it tends to make people pretty impatient, and you're alienating people. That's the last thing you want, I think. Or is it? That's one of those tough questions to put to yourself -- "Who am I being that I do this in my life?" and "How long am I willing to keep generating feeling bad?" I would so love for you to generate a life you love, Chado. Best wishes and many kisses. |
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03-16-2008, 05:20 PM
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| Read this and maybe you can understand how I feel better... trapped inside myself... Depression and Your Sense of Control |