Positive expectation and being naive...

[C33]

I usually discipline myself to expect the best of situations and people, and to always utter at least one positive statement in the context of a bad situation.
For example:¨this is not working out but I am learning from this situation.¨

However, lately, after working on manifesting love for a number of months, and hoping for a positive outcome, I have interpreted a situation as positive, when in reality, it was only me who had positive expectation about it.

I trusted the process, and when I met a nice guy with a lot of my listed values and qualities, who showed interest and attraction,I concluded that my intention was being manifested.

Unfortunately, his interest waned very quickly, and it looks like he is not into me after all. ( although he acted like it).I want to add that nothing sexual happened, just a nice kiss.

Now, I am being told by friends and my own little voice that I am being very naive, and borderline stupid.
However, if the outcome had been different and my positive expectation had brought positive results, I would be the first one to congratulate myself on being hopeful and having positive expectations, and my friends would be the first ones to rejoice.

This is not the first time that I label myself naive from expecting the best. However, if I don 't expect the best, how can I obtain it?

I had the same outcome with apartment hunting: intended, acted on the intention ( went on a search ) felt I found the right place then was told I needed twice the money I thought was agreed upon to move in.

Is my positive expectation making me naive, and attracting people who abuse my naivete, or am I too fast in judging myself as being the flawed one?

[Mark Lapierre]

I don't believe that intention manifestation works in such an indirect manner, so I don't think the results were anything to do with your efforts in that regard.

I think it's simply that not everyone you meet is going to be ideal, and even people who have been in a lot of relationships and are highly aware might end up in a relationship which initially looks promising, but then fizzles.

Likewise when apartment hunting you're simply going to find a lot of less-than-ideal places.

I think this is a good example of one of the issues with intention manifestation. Positive expectations can lead to disappointment. But I don't think the solution is to expect less, but to not rely on those expectations to manifest. Ironically that's one of the steps of intention manifestation; letting go of the intention and just allowing it to happen.

We're naturally inclined to form expectations but it's not so natural to accept the situation when those expectations are not met. That's what I think you could benefit from working on, C33. I don't think there's anything wrong with expecting the best, as long as you're willing to put in the required effort to get it, and can accept that the rarer it is, the more likely it is that you'll get something you don't want before you get what you do want.

[PennyD]

C33,

Manifesting a wonderful man with all the values you want, at the right time for you both is a big manifestation, so is manifesting the perfect accommodation with all the right criteria including great price.

I think you are doing really amazing with both these manifestations and that as you become more and more confident with your power that you can manifest the perfect accommodation and man, that these manifestations with some let down will cease to happen so often.

I know because I used to be a 90% girl. That is I could manifest so much that was 90% perfect. But it was not until someone pulled me up on this and I realised that I was not being couragious enough to ask for 100%.

I worked on my belief that I deserve 100% perfect manifestation and sure enough I started to manifest 100% of exactly what I had asked for.

To tie it in with what Mark has said, I would have had a 100% expectation but a sneeky little belief that only 90% could happen. And that belief would always win in the game of manifesting.

Also want to reiterate that manifesting a great guy is very couragious and there maybe some hit and misses and some tweeking to be done before you manifest the perfect guy for you. Keep at it I know it will happen for you.

kind regards
Penny

[C33]

Penny and Mark,

You brought clarity and compassion to this matter, and you were right on the money!Thank you for your encouragements.

Yesterday night, I allowed myself to let the disappointmentt out of my system by indulging in a few tears...

I decided to do something unusual: celebrate my failures at getting proper lodging and the proper guy by having a glass of bubbly and a few chocolates( did not overindulge: had a glass and a half and ate about 4 chocolates).

I was saving these goodies to celebrate moving in my new place or to entertain this new guy!
Instead, I decided to be thankful for the lessons learned and to reward myself for moving forward with my life and being persistent with my intentions.

Also, I put a cap on the amount of time to be sorry for myself. The goal was to be over the disappointment by this morning and to change tactics by releasing expectations.

I chose to spend the working day ( we are co-workers, soon to be separated to work in different locations ) in a state of appreciation of his person.

He was kind, respectful, friendly and proved to me that my perception of him had been right. ( At least I didn't delude myself, which is something I tend to do when in love).
Not only is he a great guy,but he is close to 90 % of what I want,and yes, Penny, I think I didn't truly believe I could get 100% of my list).( He even likes to dance, which is something really rare in a heterosexual man!)

The romantic part of me would love him to be in my future as a boyfriend, however, I will be happy with being a friend, or at least a pleasant memory.

I understand that he respected me by not pursuing anything further. He acted like he realized I deserved and wanted a committed relationship, something he was not able to offer, as he seems more on an experimental phase of life.( He is younger.)


The apartment is not forthcoming either, but I am confident I will get a better one than the one I lost yesterday.

Thank you again for your valuable input.

[PennyD]

Hay C33,

Great post. I believe that you are very close to getting the perfect guy for you.

As you have acknowledged you are ready and open for this great guy and that the universe just sent you a possibility. He seemed very close and gave you the gift of tasting the reality of what was to come (sounds amazing by the way) as well as clarifying how important committment is too.

So you have secretly rejected him as well. As he did not fulfull all your desires so he bowed out.. but he only knew he did not fulfull all your desires by the energy you were giving off, the energy of desiring and deserving committment!

yay to celebrating NOW!!

Can't wait to hear when the great guy really turns up, I believe you are 100% ready.

take care
Pen

[Jennihul]

You are working on manifesting love, and this man left your life. I would call that a success! Now this man who didn't feel as you do has made room for your true love to enter.

Oh...you didn't mean that you were trying to manifest love with him...a specific person, did you? That would mean you would be trying to control him with your mind. Acting upon another being's free-will is breaking the rules.

Jennifer