It is hard to keep believing

[Michelle M]

I am an accountant but not exceptionally gifted and talented as all the big wheels. I go to work and do the best and most honest job I can with the resources given to me. I was an average student in school and was raised to be a good little Catholic Girl. I was given a dream of being able to achieve what every my hearts desire might me. Though God all things are possible.

Sadly I am finding it to be a crock of junk. Life continues to knock me over and over and over. I have follow a pattern to achieve success by the following steps and being willing to try again;
• Set a Goal
• Creating a plan
• Worked on my attitude - Reinforcing my mental attitude with quotes of inspiration and positive attitudes,
o Leap and the net will appear
o I believe I was entrusted with this dream and only I can allow the dream to dye.
o I gain strength, courage and confidence by looking fear in the face, proceeding anyway and knowing I have lived through it
o Go directly in the direction of your heart
• Earned Degree - I returned to college and completed a BS in accounting to increasing the chances for reaching my goal.
• Continuing Education - I take an exceptionally large amount of continuing education classes to keep up with the changing environment.
• Productive - I am a get it done and dig right in type of person that does not wine or complain. I do not back down from a challenge but just get to work and get things done. I do not use the word can't.
• Follow action steps to get to my next level


The problem is I am officially falling under the definition of insanity. I am repeating the same pattern of events over and over again expecting a different result. I think this time it is time for me to give up and get a job that takes about as much brain power as blowing my nose. I am just not destine to be anything special. It is sad to realize that.

[Savage]

Hmmmm... Who looks into their deepest heart's desire and comes up with, "I want to be an accountant"?

In the past couple years of helping people with life purpose issues, I can't recall a single person coming up with "be an accountant" as their genuine answer. I'm not saying it's impossible, but if that was the destiny you came up with, were you really following your heart, or did you succumb to fear and try to play it safe?

Why accounting? If you had a few billion dollars in the bank, would you still want to work in that field? Would you still want to do it if you only had 6 months to live? If accounting is really your true purpose, you can probably answer yes to both questions with little or no hesitation. Otherwise, it may be time to step back and dive into that inner abyss and have a look around.

[Amit]

Do you focus any of your energies in any personal pursuits? If you're feeling like you're stuck in a rut then you need to expand your horizons. Like Steve said, dig deeper into the abyss but if you don't come up with much then you've got to explore outside and try new things!

I want to draw your attention to your opening line:

"I am an accountant but not exceptionally gifted and talented as all the big wheels."

That told me everything I needed to know and and I guessed the rest of what you had written, before I'd read it, with 99% accuracy!

Yes you have got talents, you've just yet to ellicit them from yourself.

There's a massive world out there with infinite variety, go and check it out!

I wrote a blog post a while back entitled "Stuck and not sure what to do with life?" Have a read if you wish, you may find something in there which may help.

You have much more going for you then you give yourself credit for or even understand about yourself. For starters, I admire your courage in admitting openly how you're feeling. Now it's time to take that courage and plough it into something new!

[Aronx]

as Steve said, you have to look in the deep of your heart, many "techers" says that you have first to know your best talents and then found a job like that, but it is a common mistake, because you may have some talents, but it not necessary direct you to what you really want. Other mistake is focusing on money. I'm not saying that this is bad, but people are in bad situations, are stressed or something else (like You) and are going toward their only solution they see. Important thing is to feel good (you said " I am officially falling under the definition of insanity ") if you keep going this way you may have dificulties into acquiring anything. Don't focus on what you can do, focus on what you want do to (sit down, relax, let go any negative thoughs and then ask a question, but do it without any "wanting" (sometimes when people want something they are puting negative energy in it and don't even know it) ask yourself: what is it that i truly want in this moment. Ang go for your inner self, your inner joy, the little voice deep in your soul, when you focus on it, you should start to feel good), do everything without desperative wanting, or focusing too much, first take care of yourself, of how you feel, when you will feel good with yourself then ask yourself, if i could do anything i want (many people ansfer to this question is : writing ) what would it be? and then you have an answer. It really isn't important that you don't have talents in direction of what you want to do, what really matters is to feel good. Then start focusing toward your goal the same way you focus to feel good ( focus on though, on feeling good/joy/happiness, believe (and truly believe without doubt, but don't get frustrated) that you are feeling good, and let go any of negative emotions, you will start to feel good)

[justfiverules]

Cheers Michelle - you've proved me wrong!
All those years I spent in cubicle land and here's me thinking bean counters had no heart ;-)

Have you read any of the goal free living material on Steven Shapiro's site?

How To Be Goal-Free When You Have Obligations : Stephen Shapiro