Letting go of the past

[hawkal]

Hi, my past is a very negative part of my life which has a burden on my present and thus probably affects my future. I find I live in the past a lot and have a lot of hindsight but not much foresight. I used to get bullied, I did terrible during my education. I know for a fact I could of been an A grade student but I was just too lazy and I lived for the day at the time and didn't care much for my future. During one of my final exams I just didn't even try, I just wanted to get home so I could go out with my mates and smoke some weed.

Now thats all gone (including those "mates") I find I still have bottled up rage and grudges against the people that hurt me. I sometimes think about how I could learn a martial art build up some muscle find where they live and smash there faces in just so I can get revenge. I don't consider them as human, they're just scum. If I saw one of them in danger for whatever reason and they needed help I wouldn't even consider it, regardless of whether they had changed.

Now I need to somehow let go of my past and focus on making my future a much more positive one but I don't know how to. People will say "just let it go and move on" but it doesn't work like that, thoughts of my past seem to creep up from my subconscious to my conscious like my mind is being raped by my past and it just makes me feel pretty bad.

How can I let go of my past?

[Zukin]

Hi hawkal,

A good way to overcome negative thoughts about your past (and negative thoughts in general) is by using the swish pattern from neuro linguistic programming. This post by Steve has more information:

http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/200...ught-patterns/

[artic123]

The problem of letting go of the past is that it pops up at the most inopportune times. This is why people make peace with their past.

Can I recommend the book "Power of Now" and anything on "mindfulness". I am not the person to tell you how to manage feelings, but I do know concentrating on "this moment, at this time" has gotten me through the day many times.

My prayer is that you find a way of not letting the past destroy your future.


S

[Angela]

I think your idea to study a martial art is an excellent plan! Not for the reasons you are thinking, but for the purpose of building power, joy, energy, momentum, peace, and real presence into your life.

I hope you go ahead and sign up for a class soon.

[geekchic9]

It sounds like you are being very hard on yourself and your former mates. I've never studied martial arts, but I do know that the philosophies behind many martial arts do not support vindictiveness.

Commit to forgive yourself and others. You are not flawed to the core, nor is anyone else. We're all human, and it is natural that we all are imperfect.

One thing that really helped me when I was healthy enough was the Belief Paraliminal CD. When problems started hurting me to the point of distraction, I decided to go to intensive outpatient therapy at a local hospital to work on the issues that would fix my problems with myself and my past. Both have been really helpful, but I have to say that the Belief Paraliminal CD is much cheaper. If you can't find a program like that at your hospital, another cheap option is to do the exercises within the book The Authentic Career, which is more about finding yourself than finding a job. You won't have the benefits of group feedback, unless you start the group yourself, but you will have a lot of the same beneficial insights into yourself.

Good luck with everything, and keep us updated on your progress.

[lysetskilde]

I have actually made, what I call a triple breath that code your water, so it is easyer foir you to let go of old and not supportive emotions, it is free to use and it is very easy, you can go to my website and try. I have also made a small radio show and you can listen to it here here I explain some more.

Your body contain 75-80 % water and the healing water you can make on your own, start vibrating and do it together with the water in your body, after some time your life will change and the way you look at the world will change.

Please enjoy and ask if you have questions.

[hawkal]

Thank you for your replies they are greatly appreciated.

[Old Soul]

The only true way to let go of the past...

is to live entirely in the present.... grab each moment and love it, charish it
work in it...... break the day down to moments..... you will be so involved in the now......... that the past will be just that the past/

[hawkal]

Wow... thanks old soul that really resonated with me.

[joelyle]

Hi everyone,

Believe me, I am as prone as anyone to living in the past/future. It is an amazing excerise to see each moment as fresh, that all we see is subject to perception and change. It is liberating to uncouple our point of view from a fixed-perspective: seeing ourself in a fixed way; fixating on one possibilty (for example romance, the idea of having a 1:1 relationship, while this is great: how many other people are we connecting with less because of this?). I love an excerpt from I Am That which states:"Between the banks of pain and pleasure the river of life flows. It is only when the mind refuses to flow with life...that it becomes a problem".

You don't have a life: YOU are LIFE

[DailyGrowing]

hi,i think you should find your life's goal first.then ,keep your eyes on it and do the nessecery things to achieve it.
keeping yourself busy maybe a good approach to say goodbye to your past.

[Maguru]

Your past is very much a part of who you are now. You can never forget the past but the negative effects have changed you in some way. Some for the better and probably some for the worse.
Try to see that without the negativity, you would have missed out on invaluable experience. Once the positive arises from the negative, the acknowledgement of your maturity will negate the hurt and resentment. Positive and negative are there for a very good reason. Without one the other cannot exist.

Originally Posted by hawkal

Hi, my past is a very negative part of my life which has a burden on my present and thus probably affects my future. I find I live in the past a lot and have a lot of hindsight but not much foresight. I used to get bullied, I did terrible during my education. I know for a fact I could of been an A grade student but I was just too lazy and I lived for the day at the time and didn't care much for my future. During one of my final exams I just didn't even try, I just wanted to get home so I could go out with my mates and smoke some weed.

Now thats all gone (including those "mates") I find I still have bottled up rage and grudges against the people that hurt me. I sometimes think about how I could learn a martial art build up some muscle find where they live and smash there faces in just so I can get revenge. I don't consider them as human, they're just scum. If I saw one of them in danger for whatever reason and they needed help I wouldn't even consider it, regardless of whether they had changed.

Now I need to somehow let go of my past and focus on making my future a much more positive one but I don't know how to. People will say "just let it go and move on" but it doesn't work like that, thoughts of my past seem to creep up from my subconscious to my conscious like my mind is being raped by my past and it just makes me feel pretty bad.

How can I let go of my past?