How Well Do You Tip?

[Elenny]

My apologies if this topic has been discussed here before, but I'm intrigued...

I just got back from Sunday brunch with a group of friends. We go to brunch every week, and we take turns picking up the tab. Today was my turn to pay.

The total for the four of us was $53.75 and I put a $100 bill on the check holder. The waitress came by...not knowing there was a $100 bill in the check holder.....and asked if I would be "needing any change". I looked at her, smiled, and said "no".

So I left her a tip for $46.25. When she realized I had given her $100, she came back and asked if I would be needing any change again. And once again I smiled and said "No...the change is yours".

That started a debate among my sister and my two best friends that could have taken us through the rest of the day.

I usually tip the standard 20%....and 15% if the service is not quite up to par.

But today when this girl asked me if I needed any change, something came over me. I actually felt a warm feeling through my body, and all I could do was smile and say "no", and I felt very good about it.

My friend Alyssa, who is a very well paid attorney, actually said that I was doing more harm than good by leaving such a large tip, because now the waitress would not work that hard to earn other tips during her shift because she was "good for the day"....and other customers would suffer from subpar service.

I don't buy into that theory at all, but I'm interested in hearing how the smart people of this forum handle tipping.

When we talk about tips we usually think about restaurants, but I would like to hear about other tipping situations also, such as the paper boy, the valet, housekeeper at the hotel, etc.

How well do you tip, and who do you tip?

[Shamou]

I have been to a great many seminars and stayed in hotels a lot... and I know for a fact, at least in these cases, a nice fat tip is the best investment that you can make... soon, the whole staff treats you like royalty... and they give you all kinds of perks that would otherwise cost a fortune...

And, while I was a student, I worked in the hotel business... so I know what it is to depend on tips to make a living... so, I'm a big tipper...

That $46.25 tip made you feel good about yourself and the memory will last for years... best deed you probably did in a long, long time... my hat is off to you...

.

[Erki]

Originally Posted by Elenny

My friend Alyssa, who is a very well paid attorney, actually said that I was doing more harm than good by leaving such a large tip, because now the waitress would not work that hard to earn other tips during her shift because she was "good for the day"....and other customers would suffer from subpar service.

I think it's exactly the opposite. Meaning that she was very happy afterwards and all her other customers got a very good service from a very friendly waitress.

[Michelle]

Originally Posted by Elenny

My friend Alyssa, who is a very well paid attorney, actually said that I was doing more harm than good by leaving such a large tip, because now the waitress would not work that hard to earn other tips during her shift because she was "good for the day"....and other customers would suffer from subpar service.

How could your friend possibly be that arrogant to assume she knows how someone she met so briefly will feel or react? And she wants to judge this on account of her waitressing profession? One could just as easily assume that the waitress was on cloud 9 for the rest of the day and the rest of her customers benefited.

[Erki]

I also think that her coming back to ask you second time if you needed a change shows that she cares about the customers and don't want to rip them off. Kudos to her.

[Erin Pavlina]

Steve and I have increased our tips as our income has increased. For a long time I didn't know that people left tips for the housekeepers who make up your room at a hotel. I was mortified when I found out because we had never tipped them. Now we leave money on the pillow or dresser.

At restaurants I usually tip 15-18% unless the service was exceptional and then I'll do 20%.

But the other day we were at an event where we had to pay $10 for valet parking. I wasn't sure if you're supposed to tip when you have to pay for valet. Anyone know? I always tip when the valet is complimentary. But $10 for parking my car 2 feet away already seemed pricey. What would you guys have done? I tipped but only because I saw everyone else in line tipping.

[Zukin]

I usually tip 20%, but sometimes I'll tip 50% if I can sense the server needs a lift, which gives me the opportunity to act with Heart-Centered Motivation.

[sonbuenas]

Start at 20%, more if you are treated well, fifteen if the service is horrid. Even if the bill is small, say $15 bucks or something, I feel bad giving someone less than five dollars to wait on me. I really don't get bad tippers. I mean, if you're going out to eat, it's not really about saving money is it? If you can't afford to leave a decent tip, you probably should skip the dinner at Applebee's and cook at home.

[ZHereford]

Originally Posted by Erin Pavlina

But the other day we were at an event where we had to pay $10 for valet parking. I wasn't sure if you're supposed to tip when you have to pay for valet. Anyone know? I always tip when the valet is complimentary. But $10 for parking my car 2 feet away already seemed pricey. What would you guys have done? I tipped but only because I saw everyone else in line tipping.

I do the same thing you do. If the parking is free I always tip, but if there is a charge (especially $10.00!) I normally would not. I probably would have done the same thing and tipped if everyone else was tipping because I honestly don't know what the etiquette is in a case like this.

[JohnPlace]

At full-service restaurants, I usually tip 20 to 25%. The only exception is when I get truly terrible service, which doesn't happen very often.

IMO, you should never feel bad about giving a big tip. You made that girl's day, I am sure. And who knows - she may have really needed the money.

But sometimes I do wonder how much I should tip at buffets. I usually just leave a buck or two, but I really don't know what the standard tip should be when you are the one getting your own food, and the staff is bussing the tables and bringing drinks. Any thoughts on this?

[Ree]

I always tip 20% and I go a little higher for excellent service. We have always just figured the tip into the cost of eating out. We don't consider it optional.
For personal service, such as a pedicure or a massage, I just settle on an amount, like $10 or $15 and that's what I always tip. Same with the hairstylist. For what I consider non-personal services such as hotel housekeeping or bellboys, etc., I tip $5.

[RT Wolf]

Originally Posted by Michelle

How could your friend possibly be that arrogant to assume she knows how someone she met so briefly will feel or react? And she wants to judge this on account of her waitressing profession? One could just as easily assume that the waitress was on cloud 9 for the rest of the day and the rest of her customers benefited.

I'm guessing the attorney is used to dealing with people with respect to incentives, however I think she made an error in judgement by now factoring in that a variable-rate reinforcement schedule could actually push the waitress to provide better service in hopes of better tips.

[{aspiring_to_clarity}]

Standard tip for me in a restaurant is 20%, barring bad service. If I feel something telling me to give a really generous tip, I'll do it because I know there's a reason...even if it isn't apparent to me. It's nice to be in a position to brighten someone else's day. Good for you.

[Mark Lapierre]

In Australia it's not customary to tip, nor required since staff are usually paid good hourly rates. So most of the time I don't unless the service is truly deserving, i.e., friendly, engaging, prompt.

I really like that some people are willing to put in the effort to provide good service even when they know they probably won't get a tip out of it (especially when a few places divide tips amongst the staff rather than giving it directly to the person who earned the tip).

[rwarlick]

Mark - i hope you remember to tip here in the US and Hawaii is part of the US. we finally got mgmt to ad an insert to the check presenter explaining the tip.

Elenny - you made your server's day, no doubt about it.

[Mark Lapierre]

I'll do my best to remember Rod, and I'm sure whomever I'm with will remind me. And since I'll be on holiday, and no doubt in a good mood visiting some awesome people, I'll tip generously.

[ageofz]

Haha it was ironic that someone mentioned Applebees earlier because I'm currently a server at one. Coming from a server's point of view, I usually average 15% of all my net sales. Of course many of you believe that this is low, but it is mainly due to the fact that the place I work at isn't in a big city. When I served at another tourist city, it was common to leave with 25-30% of my net sales.

Some people, no matter how good you cater to their needs, just leave crappy tips regardless. It gets sort of discouraging, but I don't dwell on it. Some servers, however, complain about it and as a result the rest of their night is full of bad tippers. Don't think for a second that you caused that girl to deliver less-than-adequate service to the rest of her customers -- if anything, she was happy and you improved her service. Sometimes I wonder is people realize that I only make 2.13$ an hour and I have to tip out 15% of my tips to the bartender/hosts. I still make good money because if this wasn't the best paying job while I'm going to college then I wouldn't do it .

[StarFish]

At cheaper places, like Waffle House (a cheap dinner here in the south) I usually tip 50%. My meal is usually under $5, but I've been known to stay a long time chatting with friends and drinking lots of coffee, so I try to trip well. Other places, I'll tip between 20% and 50%, just depending on their service.

If I get bad service, I will not tip. I'm sorry if that sounds bad, but you'd really have to go out of your way to give me HORRIBLE service because all I really require is my drink be refilled atleast once, twice if I'm there awhile.

[carenkh]

Originally Posted by Erin Pavlina

I wasn't sure if you're supposed to tip when you have to pay for valet. Anyone know?

Don't be afraid to ask. The valet will be honest - it may be that they give that $10 fee to the establishment, or just part of it. While some people are taken aback, when I worked for tips I always appreciated someone asking, "What would a good tip be?" I'd explain about the 15% "standard". In the valet situation, I would have asked, "Who gets the $10? Should I tip, as well?" It probably varies from place to place.

[Scin]

Unless I'm very, very impressed or very, very put off by a waiter's service, I leave a standard formula tip - not a percentage, but rather whatever amount will bring the total up to an even number that's a "reasonable" tip. Examples:

$6.63 bill, $2.37 tip
$23.86 bill, $3.14 tip

And so on. I don't often think of percentages, I just "feel" the amount. Also, I can't stand uneven charges on my bank account/credit card. I don't know why.

[A.K.Light]

I tip well. I just always have. For various reasons, I guess.

[ThoughtAddict]

In restaurants I generally consider a few dollars to be the price of sitting and observing people, or of having a good place for conversation. You can learn so much just by watching people and the experience of going out with a friend is so enjoyable. Definitely worth a few dollars...

Beyond that, 15% for mediocre service. The upper limit is whatever I feel right giving. Sometimes it is based on the quality of service, sometimes on what my gut tells me to do.

One memory I have of working at an old drive-in food place was getting a tip from an older gentleman in an extremely nice car. He handed me a $50 on a $5 meal and told me to keep it. It's something I remember, and it really made me feel better on a bad day. After some bad experiences that $50 made a world of difference in my next day, week, probably some lasting effect even today. That kind of thing made me pay attention to how I treat people who are providing any service.

Generosity, if you're really feeling it and can afford it, is never a bad move.

[Freelancer]

Just a question about a reverse tipping situation (err lol?) a buddy of mine got.

He was at the casino and won a 6k jackpot at poker (don't know the details) ,how much would you tip the dealer that dealt the cards?

I figured 50$ would do the trick but admittedly I don't have a whole lot of experience with this.

[sv800]

Originally Posted by Erin Pavlina

Steve and I have increased our tips as our income has increased. For a long time I didn't know that people left tips for the housekeepers who make up your room at a hotel. I was mortified when I found out because we had never tipped them. Now we leave money on the pillow or dresser.

At restaurants I usually tip 15-18% unless the service was exceptional and then I'll do 20%.

But the other day we were at an event where we had to pay $10 for valet parking. I wasn't sure if you're supposed to tip when you have to pay for valet. Anyone know? I always tip when the valet is complimentary. But $10 for parking my car 2 feet away already seemed pricey. What would you guys have done? I tipped but only because I saw everyone else in line tipping.

It happened to me with a "hair cut"...I was new in town then I went for a hair cut. About the third time I realize that clients were tipping the young lady..I felt horrible about that, hopefully she learned I was a foreign

[Gene]

Originally Posted by Elenny

The total for the four of us was $53.75 and I put a $100 bill on the check holder. The waitress came by...not knowing there was a $100 bill in the check holder.....and asked if I would be "needing any change". I looked at her, smiled, and said "no".

How well do you tip, and who do you tip?

I tend to tip well when there is good service or if I am "moved" to do so as seems to be the case in the incident you describe.

When I am generous it reinforces to me that I believe in abundance rather than scarcity. When I am generous in this and other areas of my life I feel good in my heart. I sincerely hope the ways I am generous is helpful to the recipients of my tips but can not absolutely know the effect my behavior will have on them.

I almost always get good service if I return at a later time which is also nice.

When I am generous in this and other areas of my life I feel good in my heart.

[rwarlick]

Gene - same for me usually. It's about ME, and MY feeling about abundance and sharing more than the others persons service.

Year before last I won some money from a football pool. I received the prize in an envelope and assumed it would all be in there, the full amount.
The administrator/coordinator of the pool had actually taken out 10% percent and distributed it to himself and others. In the envelope I received 10% less than expected.

I was was angry my choice of "tipping" had been removed. I would have given about half that amount or 5%, which had been the customary rate up until that point, in my experience.

I didn't say a word to anyone about this. I could have made such a huge deal about it and realized how fortunate I was they didn't take 20% or even half as an upfront fee. Plus, I didn't want to be remembered as a cry baby.

Similiar stories?