What next?

[catalyst]

Career-wise I'm doing well. Income is enough for me to afford some luxuries - I earn in an hour what some people make in day of work. Relationship wise - I do have a girlfriend, although I don't feel much emotional attachment to her. I just don't feel strongly either way about it to either end it or continue it (perhaps this is a sign)...

Anyhow, I have a constant sense of lack. I feel like I am capable of more, but I spin my wheels trying to figure out what to do next.. Start a business? New relationships? I'm just not finding meaning in things. When I look back - I think I felt most complete when I was in a relationship with the ex, and since she left me years ago, I've accomplished all kinds of things, but none of them have made me any more content with my life. I've noticed I've been drinking a lot more, and even smoking cigarettes again.

Anyone else face this kind of rut? I'm not sure if this is a mid life crisis. I have the will and desire to work harder and push myself further. Discipline and hard work is not a challenge for me, but I don't know where to apply this energy.. I have no target to aim for, except to make more money - and to have more material things, and continue the cycle.

[Sandstone]

I am pretty much 28 years old and retired. Not needing to work for money was a bit of a shock to my system. I went through a long what next? what now? phase. For myself I needed to concentrate on balance in my life. I went through specific areas of my life i.e. relationships, career, home, health, spiritual, etc and analyzed how balanced I was. The end result was understanding that I needed to work on relationship and spiritual balance in my life.

[Merrick1]

Originally Posted by catalyst

Anyhow, I have a constant sense of lack.

I'd say, it's normal. We all need a sense of material security. But it doesn't necessarily make us happy. Perhaps you could have 100x more money than what you have now and yet still feel the same.

Would you say that it is possible that you need to look under the surface of things? To look deeper into yourself to get to know yourself better? To explore thoroughly what you find deep inside? I can tell you, it is a never ending and exciting discovery, once you start.

When we remain scratching the surface we never find a true fulfillment. And from that unsatisfactoriness we tend to seek more and more pleasure in the outer world, hoping that it will numb the confusion or fill the inner emptiness while, in reality, achieving quite the opposite.

Merrick

[catalyst]

Thanks for the replies.

I agree that I haven't been looking under the surface - I know that I care too much about what others think about me, so I've been more focused on appearances. I grew up around a lot of narcisstic people, and I think that rubbed off on me in some ways.

Relationships - this is what I need to work on. I will focus my energies on meeting new people, outside of the usual circle...