I feel like such a failure

[HPM]

Hi, I'm new to these forums, I came here to see if anyone could help. I'm 18 years old, and I feel pretty hopeless at the moment about my life and future.

I do well at school, I am above average, but at my school I have no proper friends. People used to make fun of me a bit, now most people don't really talk to me, but I've basically finished school. My social experience has made what I suspect to be social anxiety much worse, and I have had OCD for much of my life. Anxiety seems to be a big problem, I failed my driving test again the other day because I made a stupid mistake due to nerves. In general I wish I had a stronger character, to be someone that is more optimistic and less anxious, but when I get optimistic I get idealistic and when my dreams are shattered I lapse back into pessimism. I didn't apply to university last year (probably will this year) but I have no idea of what I'm going to do with my future, which at the moment appears to be a vast expanse of meaninglessness. I think of people in less fortunate positions, and it makes me feel even more pathetic. I have no idea of what I want to do at university, or in life in general. I don't completely understand people and don't have much confidence around them, and I am indecisive, now most of the time tired for an unknown reason, and recently found it hard to be motivated, but I am not sad, so I wouldn't say it was depression.

If anyone could help it would be great

[Franco904]

Wake up everyday and say out loud 10 times '' in 100 years everything will be OVER, all these ********, the fun things, the bad things, money, food, sex, cars etc etc

EVERYTHING WILL END IN 100 YEARS FOR YOU, so just RELAX AND ENJOY THIS CRAZY RIDE, those people don't give yo anxiety, your monkey mind is ****ing with you, it's too serious.

Go smoke some weed, walk naked on the street, dress as a woman/man, act crazy, and the anxiety will be gone forever, I promise.

All your problems are EGO, it's the single villain in life, our ****ing EGO, you have to master it once and for all.

Good-luck

[Angelique]

It's okay to be lost. It can feel terrible though. I'm sorry you're hurting.

The Work of Byron Katie - She's awesome and the info is free.

[Bluerose224]

There are many things it could be. Unfortunately it will probably require working through what everyone suggests to see what helps. My suggestion is to take a multi-vitamin. What you describe happened to me last summer and I think I was deficient in the B vitamins and zinc. It's hard to eat right when you feel like this!

[sweety]

Originally Posted by Bluerose224

There are many things it could be. Unfortunately it will probably require working through what everyone suggests to see what helps. My suggestion is to take a multi-vitamin. What you describe happened to me last summer and I think I was deficient in the B vitamins and zinc. It's hard to eat right when you feel like this!

i also have the same problem as him,and i read before about vitamin b12,so do u think it really can help in something? i was thinking of taking B complex

[Dulma]

Originally Posted by HPM

Hi, I'm new to these forums, I came here to see if anyone could help. I'm 18 years old, and I feel pretty hopeless at the moment about my life and future.

I do well at school, I am above average, but at my school I have no proper friends. People used to make fun of me a bit, now most people don't really talk to me, but I've basically finished school. My social experience has made what I suspect to be social anxiety much worse, and I have had OCD for much of my life. Anxiety seems to be a big problem, I failed my driving test again the other day because I made a stupid mistake due to nerves. In general I wish I had a stronger character, to be someone that is more optimistic and less anxious, but when I get optimistic I get idealistic and when my dreams are shattered I lapse back into pessimism. I didn't apply to university last year (probably will this year) but I have no idea of what I'm going to do with my future, which at the moment appears to be a vast expanse of meaninglessness. I think of people in less fortunate positions, and it makes me feel even more pathetic. I have no idea of what I want to do at university, or in life in general. I don't completely understand people and don't have much confidence around them, and I am indecisive, now most of the time tired for an unknown reason, and recently found it hard to be motivated, but I am not sad, so I wouldn't say it was depression.

If anyone could help it would be great

The problem isn't all of the above. It's your negativity. Try to be more positive. If you look for reasons you're a "failure," you'll never stop finding them. You'll dig yourself into an ever deeper pit of despair.

Take a deep breath, and look at yourself. Take a step outside of your own head, in a sense, and see how you are thinking. Is it productive? Are you really trying to affect positive change in your life or are you wallowing in self-pity?

Also, try eating healthier and doing some yoga or consistent exercise if you don't do so already. It sounds to me like you're in a pretty low psychological place, judging by this post, and I've learned from personal experience that healthier lifestyle changes can do wonders to uplift one's mood. These perceived "problems" may even start to seem insignificant to you.

Good luck.

[Somnium Dico]

Originally Posted by HPM

Hi, I'm new to these forums, I came here to see if anyone could help. I'm 18 years old, and I feel pretty hopeless at the moment about my life and future.

I do well at school, I am above average, but at my school I have no proper friends. People used to make fun of me a bit, now most people don't really talk to me, but I've basically finished school. My social experience has made what I suspect to be social anxiety much worse, and I have had OCD for much of my life. Anxiety seems to be a big problem, I failed my driving test again the other day because I made a stupid mistake due to nerves. In general I wish I had a stronger character, to be someone that is more optimistic and less anxious, but when I get optimistic I get idealistic and when my dreams are shattered I lapse back into pessimism. I didn't apply to university last year (probably will this year) but I have no idea of what I'm going to do with my future, which at the moment appears to be a vast expanse of meaninglessness. I think of people in less fortunate positions, and it makes me feel even more pathetic. I have no idea of what I want to do at university, or in life in general. I don't completely understand people and don't have much confidence around them, and I am indecisive, now most of the time tired for an unknown reason, and recently found it hard to be motivated, but I am not sad, so I wouldn't say it was depression.

If anyone could help it would be great

I think everyone's had that point in their life, especially after high school, where they felt lost and confused. Many of us (myself included) acted rashly on what we thought we wanted to do, going so far as to spend a large amount of money at a university only to find we weren't passionate at all about what we chose to study.

I'm going to give you some criticism. Some of it might sound a bit cruel, but please trust me when I say I'm saying it to help.

From what I read in your post, you have anxiety problems. It's a common problem with younger people these days, and there's nothing wrong with that. But you're using it as a crutch. You should ask yourself why you're having such severe anxiety issues in the first place rather than just accepting it as part of you.

Man up! Come on, you're young, and for the first time in your life (probably) you're feeling the stress of pure choice weighing down on you. But you don't have to make these choices now. Focus on what you want to do. And before you say that you don't know what that is, let me tell you what I believe:

If there wasn't something you wanted to do, you wouldn't feel like a failure in the first place. Something tells me you're just not aware of what it is exactly that you're "failing" at, and by instinct you're associating that feeling to everything that other people would have you believe you "need" to do that you're not doing.

Just calm down, embrace who you are, and take the next step when you're ready. Don't compare yourself to other people, because you're not other people. You're you. Stop wishing to be something else.