Lack of motivation and lazy lifestyle?

[vMike]

Hello everyone,

I'm looking for some insight into my situation and suggestions from people who may have experienced similar periods in life.

So I'm in my mid 20's and I have a business that runs mostly on its own and requires little time from my side and makes me enough money so I don't have to worry about it. It's not very much, but enough to pay the bills and maintain my current lifestyle.
And that made me terribly lazy lately, I seem to spend most of time watching tv shows and movies online, playing poker, reading news and other meaningless things with short breaks to doing some work, or sports. All my friends have jobs and maybe even envy my worry-free life, but they wouldn't understand the downsides.

I try to set goals, make plans, visualize and everything from time to time, but after a while I lose interest and give it all up as I can't seem to get passionate enough about anything to stick to it.

Lately I just have this feeling that I'm going in circles in life and it's been like that for a few years, on and off. Every time I make a step forward I end up making a step backward.

I have many dreams I'd like to achieve in life and I know I could if I managed to keep the focus and motivation, but I never seem to have enough of both.

What are your thoughts on this, how do you keep growing in life and maintain the momentum and motivation?

[Bradshaw]

*Bradshaw activates his godly psychic powers*

Allright vMike, the problem here is that you're denying a part of you that's like a bird: It's free, it wants to be free, but you won't let it run wild.

The solution to your problem is creativity.

Express your creativity. Create something. Create, create, create. Perhaps there's something you've been meaning to create for some time now and you've forgotten about it?

Create something, even if it means having to learn new skills to be able to create it.

[ssandra]

Do you dream big enough? Are your dreams of a magnitude that you say "WOW>>> THAT WOULD BE AMAZING!!!" or are they just "yeah, that would be nice..."

For example, me thinking about making money? Meuh... ok, but not great. Me thinking about making lots and lots and lots of money? Still meuh.

But me thinking about buying my own house? WOW. Gold!
Me thinking about taking a trip to the US this summer and to Europe after? WOW.... AMAZING!

So.... maybe it is time for you to adjust your dreams into something that you REALLY REALLY REALLY want?

If you don't know what it is yet, create some commitment for yourself for a while. Do volunteer work, go on a few courses. Create absolute reasons to be very busy. That will help you get back on the right track again.

[Social Rob]

Hey Mike, I go through the same thing every few weeks and feel like I'm not making any meaningful progress as well. Considering I've tried the internal stuff and it hasn't made any long term difference, nowadays I'm interfering with my rubbish patterns on a physical level, so I'm making sure I get out of the house because then I can't sit around playing on the internet or watching films all the time. If visualising and planning isn't working, go for a strategy where you have to be performing actions that gel with what you want and at least you'll be getting somewhere.

I'm a student with a bar job so I'm in a similar boat financially, and could coast through the next year and a half only putting effort in when I need to, ending up with average grades and no significant improvement in my lifestyle or character, but that's not what I want, and you obviously feel the same. So force a change. Commit to something so you'll be busy doing that, and you can improve your focus and motivation on the job. This makes sense right? I haven't slept yet, got a piece of work to hand in today...

Something that is making a noticeable difference in my life is listening to motivational podcasts constantly. It's something Steve recommends in one of his early ones, and now my phone is full of David Allen, Earl Nightingale, Eben Pagan, Eckhart Tolle, Robin Sharma, Steve himself, and Zig Ziglar (currently my favourite but I'll get bored of him eventually and move onto someone else). I've been doing it for about 4 weeks now and my thoughts are definitely more... what's the word... badass. Like I feel like one of the productive business people they all talk about, even though from an external view I still look the same, but it's only a matter of time before I adjust and become that productive person. You need to constantly reinforce positive, high-aspiration thoughts or you'll slip back into old patterns.

I prob could've said all that in about 2 sentences. But it felt good to write it down. Hope it helps.

[Social Rob]

Heh I just realised ssandra said the same thing without being so long winded.

[vMike]

Originally Posted by Bradshaw

The solution to your problem is creativity.

I dunno, sounds rather fuzzy. Create a birdhouse, a multi-million dollar corporation, a lean body? How does creativity become the moving force?

Originally Posted by ssandra

Do you dream big enough?

I do, or used to, but it seems like a huge stretch from dreams to reality these days. Dreaming big is what inspires me usually.
I've traveled Europe quite a bit, done all sorts of courses, from krav maga and judo to taking philosophy classes and playing in chess tournaments. But it just doesn't feel like something that is supposed to give some essence and meaning to life, more like stuff to fill free time with. Which is fine, but the lack of that "essence", which I always thought should be related to my business and financial aspirations, is what's frustrating me.

Originally Posted by Social Rob

So force a change. Commit to something so you'll be busy doing that, and you can improve your focus and motivation on the job. This makes sense right? I haven't slept yet, got a piece of work to hand in today...

It does make sense and I've done a lot of that, but in the end it usually turns out that forcing a change is just that - forcing. Which rarely brings any prolonged results. Once you loosen your grip you end up being just where you were before.

[Boldnut]

May I ask what kind of business it is? I'm jealous of your lyfestyle I'd sit home and smoke pot all day and then do some jujitsu and weight lifting. Would be a blast

[Hampshire Girl]

Hi Mike, sounds like you've not yet cracked what REALLY drives you, because until you've figured that out it's difficult to be motivated short-term, a bit like New Year's resolutions that get broken after a few weeks because your heart isn't in it. Maybe have a think about WHY you want to achieve these particular goals and see if there's a golden thread running between them. Or you might find that actually what really drives isn't what you've been spending time focussing on and you might end up with some new goals that really get you up in the morning!

I spent quite a bit of time looking at my values, interests and beliefs and having a clearer idea of who I am and what makes me tick has made a huge difference in my life - I am much more focussed about what I want and most importantly why - as a result my motivation levels have gone through the roof :-)

[Brutha]

I do, or used to, but it seems like a huge stretch from dreams to reality these days. Dreaming big is what inspires me usually.
I've traveled Europe quite a bit, done all sorts of courses, from krav maga and judo to taking philosophy classes and playing in chess tournaments. But it just doesn't feel like something that is supposed to give some essence and meaning to life, more like stuff to fill free time with.

Those things are things that you do for yourself.
They don't help other people and as a result they aren't deeply fulfilling.

What problems do you see in the world around you that make people suffer? What pain could you solve?
Alternatively how could you help others to feel more joy?

Those are the kind of dreams that are inspiring.

[GreenSmoothieGirl]

I'm in the exact same situation! I love the analogy of the bird - saying that you're mean't to be free and such - really beautiful. I also like the post from the member who says you need to express creativity.

It seems like you have the freedom right now to explore life - you aren't bound by a hectic work schedule, a family to take care of, a huge mortgage, or other giant financial obligations. Why not save for a trip and do a little soul searching - expand your mind and your horizons for a bit and see what it can bring.

The only way that you're going to see a change is by doing something drastic - living the way you're living will never bring you true happiness, at least it wouldn't for me.

The trouble is working up the courage/getting over the laziness and lack of motivation in order to make such a decision.

My excuse right now is that I don't have the money or I could put the money to better use. However, I'm at the point where if I don't do something, the rest of my life could be ruined - I could end up feeling dull and lifeless for the remainder of my years - it could become a perpetual cycle.

Now that I've written this, I think I AM going to go on vacation

Good luck and keep us posted.