Respect, given or earned?

[ssandra]

Or something in between?

Regarding another thread, I am interested to see how other people think and feel about this issue

[ssandra]

Personally I will give my respect to everybody and try my best to respect their rights.

Only in extreme cases will I withdraw that respect, but still only to a certain extent.

I will still respect their right to live, to their opinion (no matter how stupid those opinions are ), I just might choose not to be around them anymore.

Earning respect happens as well, but it is not the person that earns the respect, it is their actions. For example I can really respect somebody who stands up for their principles, even in difficult situations. But I respect that decision, that moment, not really that person... if that makes any sense?

[Rose of Cairo]

Given, unconditional, from the first minute on.

I don't believe in respect having to be earned. It's just like trust.

Based on people's behavior or other factors (like the energy they radiate) I might choose to not be around them anymore, but this has nothing to do with the respect I have for them, which stays the same.

[Cado]

Respect has to be earned. If it isn't it's meaningless.

This says nothing of basic human respect. While one should not assume all people are trash until they prove otherwise, it's just as silly to presuppose the opposite. A bit of friendliness during an initial meeting is not only smart, it prevents you from becoming what you dislike. As time wears on and you learn more about the other person, treat them as they treat you. They'll get what they demand.

As for a basic right to live and what have you, I don't believe in such a thing as a -right- to live. Any of us could die at any moment and whether you argue we had the right to exist it wouldn't change anything. With that said, I don't go around proclaiming who should live and die and I hope no one would see fit to take my life without my consent. Nevertheless, I can't help but chuckle at the Darwin Awards.

[Liz Caitlin]

Earned. I'm a liberal free-wheeling open-minded kinda person, but I still think it's earned. You can have respect for basic human rights, but real respect? I don't think that comes until you've known a person and you can honestly get a sense of what kind of values they have, how they treat other people, what worth they have in your life. And I think it's better that way, because as a previous poster said, if we automatically give everyone respect, it doesn't mean anything. (Again, assuming we distinguish between basic respect for humans & a deeper kind of respect.)

[Piercetheveil]

General respect for all humans is given. Outside of that I dunno. I respect the heck out of myself. I tend to hang with people that do as well so it has not been an issue as of late.

Someone want to push me and find out how I am?

[Michael Chui]

I used to say that there are four currencies: time, money, trust, respect: and these are given out in ascending order of scarcity.

But I respect a rock for being a rock, a frog for being a frog, a human for being a human, and a person for being a person.

For the rest, there is behavior.

[Plays With Life]

Respect and love for every person on the planet, unconditionally, at all times.

But honestly, I don't really know what "respect" means.

[Plays With Life]

Originally Posted by Piercetheveil

Someone want to push me and find out how I am?

I'd be up for it. But I might be banned for being disrespectful.

[rei]

like i said in the other thread, i have two layers of respect for others. the first layer is given freely, automatically, and i do not think i ever withdraw it. i do not think this is the same as respect for human rights. it is respect for humans, and other creatures too.

the second layer is given after people do things which would make me have even more respect for them. like practicing one's ideals, handling a difficult decision with grace, things like that. i think there may be situations where i may feel less of this respect for someone, after a different pattern of action, but this is often temporary and they do not lose the first level of respect i have for people.

[Michael Chui]

Originally Posted by Plays With Life

But honestly, I don't really know what "respect" means.

"Regard as worth listening to"?

[blossom]

Originally Posted by rei

like i said in the other thread, i have two layers of respect for others. the first layer is given freely, automatically, and i do not think i ever withdraw it. i do not think this is the same as respect for human rights. it is respect for humans, and other creatures too.

the second layer is given after people do things which would make me have even more respect for them. like practicing one's ideals, handling a difficult decision with grace, things like that. i think there may be situations where i may feel less of this respect for someone, after a different pattern of action, but this is often temporary and they do not lose the first level of respect i have for people.

I operate this way as well.

[rei]

"A feeling of appreciative, often deferential regard; esteem. See synonyms at regard."

[Plays With Life]

What confuses me about "respect" is the different things different people find "disrespectful".

[Michael Chui]

Originally Posted by Plays With Life

What confuses me about "respect" is the different things different people find "disrespectful".

We know what death is, but people have different opinions about what is "life".

Respect and disrespect aren't behaviors; they're motivations.

[Plays With Life]

Originally Posted by Michael Chui

We know what death is, but people have different opinions about what is "life".

Respect and disrespect aren't behaviors; they're motivations.

God. Show a little respect, would you.

[rei]

Originally Posted by Plays With Life

What confuses me about "respect" is the different things different people find "disrespectful".

i think it has something to do with regard. so if you feel disrespected you don't feel properly regarded.

what i think is funny, is how this often involves that the other party is simply expected to know, telepathically, in what ways you prefer to be regarded.

i know a few people who don't feel respected UNLESS you insult them. like Clint Eastwood's character in Gran Torino.

[Obay]

Originally Posted by ssandra

Or something in between?

Regarding another thread, I am interested to see how other people think and feel about this issue

If someone works for me and has done a lot of work with me before, and havn't been rude or anything to me. I'll give them 100% respect.

At the moment I've got someone else working for me however, his giving me detailed reports, etc and his watching my finances as well.

His a very respected person in my eye.