Want to return to stripping

[CroMagna]

Ever since I stopped stripping I have wanted to go back. I stopped a year ago, because I had to finish school.

In order to go back (after returning from Brazil in a few years) I would have to do the following:

-Develop the best body of my life
-Learn new pole tricks
-Work on my hustle

This seems like a daunting task. I don't know if I will be able to make a lot of money doing this long term because of the competition, the economy, and the club policies. There are stellar looking women who make McDonald's salaries. I'm not sure if I'm cut out for this...It's a sales job and sales jobs are extremely hard to do well in.

[The Cloud]

You think you want a lot of things, but you never seem to be fully committed to going out and getting them. You try to force yourself, but since you aren't committed you always feel like you're fighting yourself. What if that's because you don't actually want what you're trying to get? Or maybe wanting doesn't have anything to do with the process of getting. I dunno, just a thought since you seem so unsatisfied with your life.

[CroMagna]

What I want is power and happiness, and peace of mind, and I think that stripping is a way to get the power and happiness and peace of mind that I'm after.

[The Cloud]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

What I want is power and happiness, and peace of mind, and I think that stripping is a way to get the power and happiness and peace of mind that I'm after.

You've wanted these things for a long time, but you haven't really had them ever. What do you think wanting has to do with actual power, happiness, and peace, if it's never gotten any of them for you before?

[YourHumbleNarrator]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

What I want is power and happiness, and peace of mind, and I think that stripping is a way to get the power and happiness and peace of mind that I'm after.

There's your problem. You get that stuff by inner transformation, not by doing one thing or the next. What you do is merely an expression of your inner state. Your actions can alter you, of course, but you've got to be ready for change. I doubt you've any idea what will really change you. (Although if you're set up to be an activist, put off further planning until you come back. That's the kind of situation that'll teach you a lot about yourself.)

Start journaling. Some hefty self-examination would do you a world of good.

[openeyes]

Years ago I'd read an article by a colorful financial advisor that occasionally worked with strippers, who made the point that:

"Professions that reward knowledge and experience have a normal earnings curve. The longer you stay at them, the more money you can expect to make, until serious physical infirmity sets in. Professions that reward looks and/or physical prowess have an inverted earnings curve. The peak earning years are at the front end of the career arc, and decline rapidly thereafter."

Inverted earnings

Stripping is unlikely to directly provide a high income long term. For that you would need to manage your savings well, funding another means of income, either education, business, or investing.

[CroMagna]

Originally Posted by YourHumbleNarrator

There's your problem. You get that stuff by inner transformation, not by doing one thing or the next. What you do is merely an expression of your inner state. Your actions can alter you, of course, but you've got to be ready for change. I doubt you've any idea what will really change you. (Although if you're set up to be an activist, put off further planning until you come back. That's the kind of situation that'll teach you a lot about yourself.)

Start journaling. Some hefty self-examination would do you a world of good.

How do you change your inner state when the outer world is so screwed up?

[yoopersmith]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

What I want is power and happiness, and peace of mind, and I think that stripping is a way to get the power and happiness and peace of mind that I'm after.

Do you love having an awesome body?

Do you LOVE the stripping and pole dancing?

DO YOU LOVE the hussling?

Would you do all of these things for FREE...just because you LOVE doing them?

If you answer NO on most of these, then you might think about something else....

...Otherwise...GO FOR IT!!!

CHEERS!

[YourHumbleNarrator]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

How do you change your inner state when the outer world is so screwed up?

The outer world is largely reliant on your perception. It's screwed up because something inside of you is screwed up. So long as you place the blame on the world, you won't be able to take responsibility and change your experience.

I know that sounds a lot like Steve's subjective reality. I don't know what your stance on that is. What I do know is that whether it's factually sound, it presents a number of solid principles. If you start with the assumption that you somehow created everything that you've experienced and you ask yourself why you did it, you'll gain immeasurable insight into the workings of your own psyche.

If that doesn't appeal to you, utilize the principle behind it and concoct a different method. The principle is this: view everything as an opportunity. Saying how screwed up the world is is a dead end. Where can you go with that? What can you do with it? Your list of actions is limited to reactions. You are at the mercy of the whims of fate. If, instead, you say to yourself, "I can make my life anything I want it to be" and you ask, "how do I need to change to get what I want?" you'll slowly break the cycle you're trapped in.

And note that there's a world of difference between asking, "how should I change" and "what should I change." In all the threads you've posted, you've focused on externals. You wanted to define yourself by your religion, then you wanted to define yourself by whether or not you did volunteer work, you've been trying to define yourself as a darkworker, and now you seem to think that defining yourself as a stripper will lead you to happiness. None of those things define you. None of those things are you or can ever be you. If you really want to change, you're going to have to do something drastically different than you've ever done before. If what you've done before now (rather, if the mindset driving you) were adequate, you wouldn't be here asking for our input on yet another slip-shod solution. Tear apart your paradigm and start fresh. It's high time you questioned your fundamental assumptions about how life works.

I was going to link you to a different article, but I can't tell which one it is just by scoping the archives of Asmoday's site so this will have to do for now. It's about breaking patterns of thought and acting unconventionally. Perhaps it will help you break past convention: The Coyote Option

If you want to search for the article I was thinking of, it was about identity and how to boil it down to your essence. It'd be helpful to search for material on that as I think the vast majority of your issues are rooted in identity. Since you appear to be somewhat spiritually inclined, Alchemy would be an excellent discipline for you to explore. This book would be a great place to start: Amazon.com: On Becoming an Alchemist: A Guide for the Modern Magician (9781590306871): Catherine MacCoun: Books

[CroMagna]

I don't want it to seem like I keep trying things half-heartedly and having them fail. I am happy and I feel that I am making progress. There are no quick fixes. Yesterday was a bad day because of lack of sleep, so I don't normally think of the world as "screw-up". Asmoday wrote an excellent article there.

Thanks for taking the time to write back.

It's still a little hard to believe that you create your own reality, but I think it's true. I've been raised to believe that there is an objective reality out there and that things "out there" "happen to you" that you "can't avoid". There are obstacles that happen to you that you have to overcome or that are permanent and you just have to live with because "that's just the way it is." But now I realize that I have been the vehicle behind this type of thinking. I created a world where everyone is united and I'm the oddball. I'm the outsider and everyone is bonded together against me. This believe exists not so much on a conscious level, but on a subconscious level. Hence I have negative, attacky thoughts involving being ganged up on and dissed. I think I created this perception to facilitate darkworking. I don't know which came first, the me against the world mentality or the desire for darkworking.

[CroMagna]

Re: stripping, it's something I'd still like to do. I did it before and enjoyed it. I was content and in my niche. I don't want to do it "so it can make me happy", that was a frazzled me talking yesterday. I am happy. I want to do it because I would enjoy it and consider it very darkworkerish, powerful, anti-sexist, and feminine. Doing this would help with my activism as I still want to follow in Johnny's footsteps.

Reading Asmoday's article for the first time, I see that I had a limiting assumption: that I wouldn't be able to make that much money doing this because I thought most of them don't make that much money, especially novices. So I would have to either do this and make no money or find a conventional job that I wouldn't like as much and make money doing that. I would like to do this and do activism. To me this is much more important that money, but I would still like to make a decent wage, like at least $50-$60K. I can't look for easy ways out of things anymore, I just have to start doing.

[lifetimelearner]

I am not going to judge you for what you want to do with your life

I personally think stripping in the presence of a lover is very sexy
but
stripping in front of a group of people may seem that you have power over them
but it is a false power

as said before you can 'feel' powerful by developing yourself as the person you were meant to be -this takes serious introspection and time
and tell yourself you are worth it
because you are

[themaster]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

How do you change your inner state when the outer world is so screwed up?

Since this is such a good question I feel compelled to answer..

The answer is you ignore the outer world and concentrate on the inner.. you see all the outer world is created through the inner

Re-translated the saying is.. "circumstances don't matter, only state of being matters"

[Michael Chui]

Originally Posted by themaster

Since this is such a good question I feel compelled to answer..

The answer is you ignore the outer world and concentrate on the inner.. you see all the outer world is created through the inner

Re-translated the saying is.. "circumstances don't matter, only state of being matters"

/me winces.

I think what themaster is trying to say is, "If stuff out there can affect you, you can affect the stuff out there."

[Conan Stevens]

Some of the ugliest strippers in a club make the best money, they have personality and are more approachable therefore make more 'acquantainces' and get more money.

I have worked with strippers for years and this has always been the case.

Set a goal too, go back to earn money for something, don't just drift along and waste all your money - I see this all too often as girls fall into the easy trap of easy money.

[CroMagna]

I'm watching an episode of Tyra Banks where they have women in the sex industry. This is making me want to go back even more. They look so hot and people really look up to them. They're seen as very powerful women, as goddesses.

[Mynder]

Maybe that is the key to this whole thing: you want to be admired? Looked up to?

What makes you think you're "not enough" if you didn't strip?

There is nothing to prove in this life. You don't have to prove anything to anyone, and you don't have to be "useful" to anybody either. You are. That in itself is enough for enjoying what is here on Earth.

All the rest is "coloring out" the experience.

[CroMagna]

I don't want to just "be". I want to have power. Not power in the sense of self-mastery, power in the sense of social clout. Like what black men have.

[Mynder]

To what purpose? What will you do with that "power"?

[CroMagna]

It would just be for it's own sake. It would make me feel vindicated and happy.

[themaster]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

It would just be for it's own sake. It would make me feel vindicated and happy.

Until you moved on to the next thing

I think you almost want to revisit your past.. but once you get there you will complain; no longer like it and move on to something else..

If you really have such good feelings about it.. you should go do it.. and kabosh the excuses/ideas "I'm not fit" etc.

[Mynder]

It would just be for it's own sake. It would make me feel vindicated and happy.

If I only had that car...
If I only were 20 pounds lighter...
If I only won the lottery...

...it would make me happy.

...for a short time.

... until the feeling of lack returns, and you seek the next thing. And then you have another "If only", and after that, another.

In effect, you spend your life struggling, suffering, for a few moments of stale glory...that after a short time doesn't mean much even to you.

Don't get me wrong. Pursuing something you like and love for the sake of it is great. It means that you're happy even while still on the journey, and whether you ever reach your destination or not, you'll have lived something you love and felt good about it.

But you fixate on something that you "don't have". You feel a lack. And once you "quench that thirst" you will notice that it wasn't what you were actually searching for and try to find the next thing.

What you are looking for is already there inside you. I know this may not make much sense to you at this time, but the questions to ask are not "how to get into a position of power", but things like...

Why do I feel the need to control/influence others?
Why do I feel the need to vindicate myself?
What am I trying to prove and to whom?
What baggage is stopping me from simply being happy?
What am I afraid of?

Looking honestly into yourself is often...uncomfortable. But it's the road out of being "the spinning top that'll never stop".

[Lioness]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

I'm watching an episode of Tyra Banks where they have women in the sex industry. This is making me want to go back even more. They look so hot and people really look up to them. They're seen as very powerful women, as goddesses.

I don't want to sound preachy but, think about the wisdom, values, and life experience of the kind of people who look up to strippers. Yes, everyone admires a beautiful body. So wear a string bikini when you go to the beach. Stripping for a living is ultimately a losing game. You are thinking small. Any high school dropout with a decent body can do that job. Dream bigger dreams than humping a pole to have geezers & skeezers drool at you.

You can still get in shape, look hot and use it in a more mind-engaging career with more long-term potential. Going back to stripping is going backwards. You've been there and done that. It's time to grow. This site is dedicated to helping people move forward with goals that add value to their own and others lives.

I personally think stripping in the presence of a lover is very sexy
but stripping in front of a group of people may seem that you have power over them but it is a false power

Yes, false, fleeting and power with no goal is pointless and ultimately unfulfilling. Owning your own business is true power. Creating a career where you can help others is powerful, and you can still look fabulous doing it and get the admiration you seek. You sound like you might enjoy working in other facets of the entertainment industry. What did you get your degree in? Can't you use that education and still be the glamorous diva you want to be?

[LVGeneration]

Originally Posted by CroMagna

I'm watching an episode of Tyra Banks where they have women in the sex industry. This is making me want to go back even more. They look so hot and people really look up to them. They're seen as very powerful women, as goddesses.

Sorry, I don't want to judge. But...
You said "people really look up to them.They're seen as very powerful women, as goddesses". Who are these "people" that look up to them? I know I don't, and nobody in my family doesn't . There's nothing wrong with stripping I guess, but I wouldn't go as far as saying people look up to strippers. I live in Vegas and have worked with ex-strippers, and have met strippers, and to be honest none has struck me as powerful or hot. Average looking most I met, none awe-inspiring or oozing "power". Power comes from within anyway, it doesn't miraculously rub off from a profession. Even if you do have a hot body and that's the reason people admire you and think of you as powerful, that has nothing to do with being a stripper.

Stripping is a form of entertaining, and maybe that's what you enjoy. To entertain. You love being in the spotlight, it gives you a sense of power. It's related to exotic dancing, and could be in a way considered a form of art. Body perfection displayed with enticing moves, from the hypnotic undulations of a belly dancer to the jaw-dropping perilous trapeze performance of a Cirque-du-Soleil star, it can be sexy and rewarding. If you enjoy it so much, why not make it into a true art that you can benefit from in the long run?
People do admire art, beauty, perfection. But stripping has nothing to do with that in most cases.

Good luck and all the best

[blossom]

I'm sorry, but it really seems like you have fallen for the "goddess" spin that the business people that own strip clubs WANT to create to change their image from being sleazy to look more legitimate and "empowering" for women...but it's serious B.S!
They want women like you to THINK that it is an empowering proffession, when really you are nothing more than a product that helps them sell alcohol to make money by playing on your ego and it's sense of false power!
It's nothing but a trick, and, it makes women like you over-identify with their bodies to the detriment of their souls! But hey, if you think false power is where it's at then go for it...it's your body and it's your soul.

[ssandra]

Originally Posted by Lioness

Owning your own business is true power.

Owning your own body is true power.
Doing what you want with your own body is true power.
Having and living through your own world view instead of others´ is true power.
Being able to listen to your own gut feeling on what you want to do, regardless of what people will say or how they will judge you is true power.
Not trying to fit in, for the sake of fitting in, is true power.
Finding and living your own happiness is true power.
Following your own path in live, and not the other sheep, is true power..

Do what you want to do with your life, and be happy doing it. If it is stripping or something else, only you know.

If you were happy stripping why not return to it? It might not ultimately be what you want to do with your life, but it will give you a breathing pause of happiness in which you can figure out the rest of it.

Good luck with it and enjoy life. That is what it is for!

[The Cloud]

You know what, go for it. Doesn't matter why anymore, anyways.

[Lioness]

Originally Posted by ssandra

Owning your own body is true power.
Doing what you want with your own body is true power.
Having and living through your own world view instead of others´ is true power. Being able to listen to your own gut feeling on what you want to do, regardless of what people will say or how they will judge you is true power. Not trying to fit in, for the sake of fitting in, is true power.

But CroMagna wants to return to stripping precisely to impress others and fit in with certain people's perception of beauty and power!

Finding and living your own happiness is true power.
Following your own path in live, and not the other sheep, is true power..

There is truth in this, but I feel uneasy with giving the young lady this message alone because I think she came here for advice from those with experience and not necessarily a general approval of whatever anyone feels they should do. IMHO I think she's wasting her time and her degree by falling back to such a superficial enterpriise and I believe she would be better served by challenging herself a bit and finding out why it is so important to her to be considered "hot" or a "goddess" by others.

Do what you want to do with your life, and be happy doing it. If it is stripping or something else, only you know.

If you were happy stripping why not return to it? It might not ultimately be what you want to do with your life, but it will give you a breathing pause of happiness in which you can figure out the rest of it. Good luck with it and enjoy life. That is what it is for!

I will concede that the OP may eventually find what she is seeking by returning to her former gig and figuring things out from there. However, and I don't mean this direspectfully, pursuing happiness or power for it's own sake seems to me a bit childish. I could be happy surfing the internet and eating ice cream and chips all day, but would it really be good for me and more importantly - is this truly my purpose? These are the ideas I hope she will think about.

[Michael Chui]

Originally Posted by Lioness

But CroMagna wants to return to stripping precisely to impress others and fit in with certain people's perception of beauty and power!

Which happens to coincide with her own. Simply because she's choosing a path that you don't yourself admire (and neither do I admire it) doesn't invalidate it. Would you so question someone thinking about returning to a job at a soup kitchen, if they were doing it for the power to positively affect people's lives and people would look upon them as good Samaritans for doing it?

[themaster]

Originally Posted by Lioness

Owning your own business is true power. Creating a career where you can help others is powerful, and you can still look fabulous doing it and get the admiration you seek.

I would like to add one to the list

- Investing in yourself is true power