Choose to be KIND rather than being RIGHT

[rak]

The war of states against states, races versus races the never ending debates of religions…

What they are trying to prove?

That they are RIGHT!!!

Many lives, efforts and wealth that been sacrificed in order to prove that they are RIGHT, but why this people want to prove that they are the RIGHT one?

To achieve PEACE? Where is the peace after war?

To achieve ENLIGHTENMENT? Where is ENLIGHTENMENT after the debates?

To achieve EQUALITY? Where is the EQUALITY after the long road of rallies?

To achieve FREEDOM? Where is the MORALITY after fighting for FREEDOM?

Of course I believe there is a time in life that we need to fight fire against fire but I think that is only SOMETIMES or might be good if we don’t choose that option anymore.

I think being kind is the starting evolution of every good –thing that we want to have in our planet. We are condition by our society that if you become KIND, people in this world will just walk over your head or by pass you. We frame our mind that there is no POWER in KINDNESS, there is no IMPACT to change or to move other person.

Is that true? If just Mahatma Gandhi, Mother Theresa and Jose Rizal can rise up from their grave and disagree to that… I believe they will.

KINDNESS is more effective than RIGHTEOUNESS if we want synergy, peace and love to our life.

Yes I agree that its easy to say than done, even myself have own difficulties on following this principle because like most of the people I was also condition by the old beliefs of you must FIGHT FOR RIGHT rather than give LOVE to those whom are not in the RIGHT TRACK. Still we must give it a try, remember that everything start to nothing and consistency will strengthen our every act until it became incurable habit.

We all have our own favorite story of heroes who fought for peace and good then they have what they wanted but it seems that its very temporary and easy to forget and hard to remember what they’ve done before. While those who use KINDNESS to achieve peace, freedom and morality like Gandhi, Mother Theresa and Jose Rizal their heroism, love and sacrifice is like a work of art that will be forever marked in our heart.

Like what Wayne Dyer said (one of my top influencer in writing and speaking)

“Choose KINDNESS rather than being RIGHT”

[Diandra25]

for people like Mother Theresa or Ghandi..they werent sacrificing they knew that love given is in fact love received.

I agree with you:

- whenever we Fight against sth,we are in fact fighting against ourselves also ( considering we are all a Unity,an universal counsciousness).

- there´s no right or wrong:there is just beliefs of what is right or wrong

[MidasGirl]

I think it is not unkind to have a debate, perhaps even a heated and passionate one. People who do it with an intention of being right are going to have a problem though. Those are the ones that resort to personal attacks and character assassination, but they'll learn to shed this negative habit over time, as it only serves to make them feel worse about themselves. If anyone gets into a debate trying to convince others to think their way, they probably aren't ripe for debates. I find that I learn more about myself from engaging in a debate than I do convincing anyone of anything. It's all in good fun.

But your premise is a good one. Choose to be kind rather than be right. Although I prefer how my boyfriend likes to put it: "Allow the other party room to be right." I think it is very kind of me whenever I choose to do that.

[Dan.Linehan]

Doesn't that just make kindness right?

[bluedragon]

We were discussing the cause of war in college during a seminar, and it appeared that many think people are inherently evil by nature, or that states are inherently seeking power, or that the system of international states has to generate confrontation. Nobody brought up the idea that personal development could be the solution for peace.

[Xanafax]

Frankly I would rather be right than kind. To accept reality - to be right - is the best way to live. To be kind at the expense of rationality is just stupid.

[Parthon]

Being right is rooted in fear anyways. If you are scared of being wrong, then of course you will fight for what is right. While people feel the need to put their own identity into what they believe there will be fear, conflict and war.

Of course, truth, love and power help you overcome fear.

[Bliss Sage]

Originally Posted by rak

The war of states against states, races versus races the never ending debates of religions…

What they are trying to prove?

That they are RIGHT!!!

I disagree. Lots of fights are fought in defense of basic human freedoms and humane treatment, it's not about being right, it's about living, it's about not being killed yourself, it's about being able to live how you want. It's about ensuring protection from a threat to your personal well-being, or national well-being, or it's about advancing your personal or national situation or well-being.

I totally agree with bluedragon--personal development, or some form of it, as a solution for peace. That is even exactly what I want my website to be about, yet I didn't manage to find such a concise way to put it as that when writing my site. I wonder if I can borrow the idea .

[rak]

Originally Posted by Bliss Sage

I disagree. Lots of fights are fought in defense of basic human freedoms and humane treatment, it's not about being right, it's about living, it's about not being killed yourself, it's about being able to live how you want. It's about ensuring protection from a threat to your personal well-being, or national well-being, or it's about advancing your personal or national situation or well-being.

So what is tha cause of being hunted or hunting someone?

It is because of "conflict of beliefs" and from there each party want to prove whos right.

[rak]

Originally Posted by Dan.Linehan

Doesn't that just make kindness right?

I think yes...

[Bliss Sage]

Originally Posted by rak

So what is tha cause of being hunted or hunting someone?

It is because of "conflict of beliefs" and from there each party want to prove whos right.

Well...considering that particular scenario, I can only think of one example of it--the U.S. hunting Osama bin Laden. I don't think the U.S. is hunting bin Laden because catching him would prove that the U.S. is right. I think they are hunting him as a form of revenge and self-defense.

I think being right is more applicable in fights and arguments within personal relationships.

[rak]

Originally Posted by Bliss Sage

Well...considering that particular scenario, I can only think of one example of it--the U.S. hunting Osama bin Laden. I don't think the U.S. is hunting bin Laden because catching him would prove that the U.S. is right. I think they are hunting him as a form of revenge and self-defense.

I think being right is more applicable in fights and arguments within personal relationships.

About Osama and the US, I dont want to comment on that, What I believe in every fight or war most of the reason is one thing because of being right.

Why we need to fight if we can find solution in a peaceful way?

Im not a priest or a minister but after hearing this word (choose to be kind rather than being right) from Wayne Dyer at first time it make me think that

"this is ridiculous"

But I try for sometimes, and yes you will felt something inside of you its somesort a state of having peace, until now I can say its part of my principle in life though like many people, I failed to apply, but again I make it sure I get back to the track.

Its hard to do this kind of priciple because most of us are condition from childhood by people around us, movies we watch or songs we listen that we must FIGHT FOR RIGHT...

[Parthon]

I think it's more than just being right. You can be right and not fight for it, and nothing will change.

It's fear that drives war and murder. Fear of being wrong, fear of being made a fool and fear of getting into trouble. As a wise little green man said, fear leads to anger.

The US "fights" terrorists and people like Bin Laden because they are scared of looking like idiots. They are scared of being randomly bombed, and they fear their "liberties will be destroyed" or whatever. It's not a suprise though. Over the last few decades the western machine has run on fear: fear in government, on the streets, in the advertisements, in schools, everywhere.

Fighting has nothing to do with being right. It's purely because certain factions are scared of being wrong, so they fight back with all of their fear and hatred.

[ijpeatey]

Originally Posted by Xanafax

Frankly I would rather be right than kind. To accept reality - to be right - is the best way to live. To be kind at the expense of rationality is just stupid.

I think it depends on how you want to live. Always seeking to prove you are right over being compassionate is a fast way to alienate people around you. Which may be what you want to achieve.

Also, can I ever really know I'm right? Once I get there I stop exploring, learning and growing. I mean, how many people really enjoy being around arrogant people?

[rak]

Originally Posted by Parthon

I think it's more than just being right. You can be right and not fight for it, and nothing will change.

It's fear that drives war and murder. Fear of being wrong, fear of being made a fool and fear of getting into trouble. As a wise little green man said, fear leads to anger.

The US "fights" terrorists and people like Bin Laden because they are scared of looking like idiots. They are scared of being randomly bombed, and they fear their "liberties will be destroyed" or whatever. It's not a suprise though. Over the last few decades the western machine has run on fear: fear in government, on the streets, in the advertisements, in schools, everywhere.

Fighting has nothing to do with being right. It's purely because certain factions are scared of being wrong, so they fight back with all of their fear and hatred.

I agree you can be right by your own belief to your self and dont fight at all, we are the one who decide what is right for us.

In my personal view fear is the effect while the conflict of beliefs is the cause.

The clash of two sides who has been strongly conditioned by certain belief, they want other people to see the world the way they want to see it too.

Both of them might be right or not but when I am thinking if we do it this way peace cannot be achieve. Time will come that the other side(whatever it is) will gain enough force and oppurtunity to prove that they are right and the never ending soft opera continue.

In my personal view fighting is related to prove to be right or sometimes the word right use in another term like "who's the best the strongest?" yes fear can be included to the reason why someone join the fight or war because they dont want the bad guys. And the good guys must prevail the thing is how can you we be sure that we are in the good side or in the bad side.

[Keith]

It appears the original poster has fallen into the same trap he warns about. He's created yet another binary division ("right" vs "kind") that he's vehement about being on the correct side of.

Can't one be both right and kind? Are there situations where kindness is not appropriate? Is it ever right to be unkind? Is this issue maybe a tad more complex than can be addressed by an arbitrary dictate like "Choose KINDNESS rather than being RIGHT"?

[MasterD]

They don't rule each other out. You need both. It's what Steve would call Oneness.

If you break into my house, I will kindly kick you out or probably not even that kindly.

[Eric Roosevelt]

Originally Posted by Xanafax

Frankly I would rather be right than kind. To accept reality - to be right - is the best way to live. To be kind at the expense of rationality is just stupid.

Yeah, irrationality is stupid.

I basically think there are two types of kindness: short-term and long-term. Short-term kindness is when you make someone feel good about themselves, regardless of the circumstances. Long-term kindness is when you say what you think is the truth, regardless of how people react to it.

Still, I think the easy answer to this problem is that we should be both kind and right. Or as the Buddha put it:

""Words have the power to both destroy and heal.
When words are both true and kind,
they can change our world."

[rak]

Choose Kindness first then from there being right will come to you effortless.

no bumping to each of them. Discussion is different on debating (being right) it is more appropriate to say that you share ideas to grow.

of course kindness and being right cannot be seperated to each other its like body and soul, the question that this article want to answer is which of them we need to prioritize? kindness or righteousness? the soul or the body? well for me I say choose Kidness (soul) first.