Living my Purpose; Others Think I'm Gloating

[Fullcrum]

Now more than ever I'm on my path to greatest fulfillment. My site on genius, intelligence and child prodigies is coming out soon (with no pages, those will come later ), my grades in school are awesome for my future goals, and my diet is coming more into alignment with what I want everyday.

All of this movement has created a lot of energy, and naturally, I want to share it with others. Sometimes, though, when I share stuff, others seem to think I'm bragging, as if I'm trying to one-up myself over them by doing such and such.

One example: I tell a friend that I wrote this "awesome" short story and that he could read it. But the friend took it as if I was "bragging".

Perhaps my ego is too strong. But perhaps some of my friends are in scarcity thinking and can't tolerate such an outpouring of energy from another?

Give thoughts, share experiences. What have you done? What would you do?

[Plato]

Originally Posted by Fullcrum

But perhaps some of my friends are in scarcity thinking and can't tolerate such an outpouring of energy from another?

Likely.

Difficult situation because envy is a real threat. They nailed Jesus to the cross.

I recommend manifesting new friends. You're living a lie if you stay friends with people who don't support you.

[ns123]

If your conversation goes like this:

friend: Hey, how are you?

you: great! I wrote this awesome short story. You can read it if you like, it's here.

If I was your friend, I'd take this as bragging to. How the conversation could go for me, as a friend, to not think you're a braggart.

friend: Hey, how are you?

you: great! I am feeling really happy these days and very in alignment with who I am. I am so thankful!

friend: Wow! What have you been up to?

you: I just wrote a short story that I'm very proud of.

friend: Really? Can I read it?

you: Sure, go here.

If they don't ask you to read it, don't volunteer that information.
There are ways to share joys with others without coming off as pushy.

But then again, you don't have to listen to me and just assume that I'm jealous and want to nail you to a cross. But that probably won't help our friendship any.

[Ralph]

I think I've had a similar problem, just on a smaller scale when my success was becoming more and more noticeable externally. In my opinion, you just need your social skills recalibrated nad you'll do totally fine. You will experience some social awkwardness and soon enough you'll learn how do you go about your success without being needlessly humble or called a bragger.


Perhaps you won't even have to improve your social circle. The problem is most probably fixable internally, given enough calibration. Go out and make mistakes. Learn from each one of them and avoid none for the first time.

After all, people DO tend to feel intimidated if you're leaving consciously and they're a sleeper. You just want to learn to tiptoe or wake them up

[aphorist]

If those people really matter to you, you'll need to understand how to tone down the external excitement and ease them into your life. It's hard to do because once you wake up, you don't want to fall back into the lies of sleep.

For me personally, I have friends who don't take things personally. So when one of us says "school is super easy for me" the others don't take it as a put down, but just as a statement. But we also don't tell eachother to read our stories because they're great. That seems a bit presumptuous, even to me.

I kind of feel like you should be confident enough that you don't have to exclaim that you wrote an awesome story and other's are allowed to read it. It should be more like "I'm proud of this story, if you want to, you can take a look." I don't find this to be humble, it's just comfortable and confident.

[Ajit Odedra]

Originally Posted by Plato

Likely.

Difficult situation because envy is a real threat. They nailed Jesus to the cross.

I recommend manifesting new friends. You're living a lie if you stay friends with people who don't support you.

I agree. You can of course calibrate yourself socially to those around you so that you don't 'rattle' them too much, but to the extent you do so will depend on their compatibility as a friend.

This is a great article relating to your query, are your friends an elevator or a cage ? .

If such a person where to say something similar to me, I'd respond in like and and encourage them to share their work.

As you progress on your journey of growth, you will inevitably release some connections to make way for new ones. It's perfectly natural.

[Dan.Linehan]

Exactly what Plato said..

Change is a constant. Know that your friendships will have to evolve as you do. Don't try to hang onto the past.

Also, make sure respect your friends' free will. If they don't want to read something you wrote, that is their option, and it's an opportunity for you to meet new friends who are more into peer review.

[Angela]

Originally Posted by Fullcrum

One example: I tell a friend that I wrote this "awesome" short story and that he could read it.

Sounds like you think you're doing him a favor by letting him read your awesome story, when he might feel like he's doing YOU a favor by taking your word that it's awesome and taking the time to read it.

I can see both your points. You are giving him a generous gift by sharing your self-expression with him, and he is doing you a HUGE favor by taking on reading your work, especially if you expect any kind of feedback from him. This could put him in something of a quandary if he doesn't think it's as awesome as you think it is.

I would handle it by letting him off the hook, and allowing him (and yourself!) to think he's doing you the favor. "Listen, I wrote a story that I'm very happy with and would like to share with you. I'd really be grateful if you'd read it, and if you would either give me your most honest feedback or feel free not to say anything at all. Is that something you're willing to do for me?"

[Maguru]

Originally Posted by Fullcrum

Now more than ever I'm on my path to greatest fulfillment. My site on genius, intelligence and child prodigies is coming out soon (with no pages, those will come later ), my grades in school are awesome for my future goals, and my diet is coming more into alignment with what I want everyday.

All of this movement has created a lot of energy, and naturally, I want to share it with others. Sometimes, though, when I share stuff, others seem to think I'm bragging, as if I'm trying to one-up myself over them by doing such and such.

One example: I tell a friend that I wrote this "awesome" short story and that he could read it. But the friend took it as if I was "bragging".

Perhaps my ego is too strong. But perhaps some of my friends are in scarcity thinking and can't tolerate such an outpouring of energy from another?

Give thoughts, share experiences. What have you done? What would you do?

You could try putting yourself in your friends shoes and see it from another perspective other than your own. regards

[liamona]

Originally Posted by Ajit Odedra

This is a great article relating to your query, are your friends an elevator or a cage ? .

Thanks for the link to that article. I'm going through a shift—I'm noticing more what words people use in conversation. I've been focusing on joy, but most of the people around me aren't! It's weird to have a few new friends who are, and the older acquaintances who aren't.

[sirkinm]

Originally Posted by ns123

you: great! I am feeling really happy these days and very in alignment with who I am. I am so thankful!

I'm a really open-minded guy, but if my friend started talking like this I'd probably bust him in the face -- not for gloating, but for being a cheeseball

[Fullcrum]

Oooh, thanks guys!

If one of my friends came up to me and did what I did to me, I'd be thrilled because they were sharing themselves.

Nevertheless, good suggestions all. Thanks!

[ns123]

Originally Posted by sirkinm

I'm a really open-minded guy, but if my friend started talking like this I'd probably bust him in the face -- not for gloating, but for being a cheeseball

LOL. There is a lot to be said about gal-friends and guy-friends. Generally speaking, guys don't say these things to each other, that's true!

I can imagine my brother and my husband talking to one another like this! And if they did, they probably would get teased about it!

Thanks for the perspective!

[timothydrake]

If they are jealous then forget em. If they aren't supportive then forget em. Life is too short and too hard as it is. Haters will always have their clique, be with the people who support you.

[ns123]

The problem is, can you prove they are jealous? Or is it you thinking they are jealous?

It would be quite a travesty indeed for you to just drop friends whom you perceive as jealous, when they just might not be that. Maybe they just don't have the time to read your short story? Maybe you really are a braggart?

If some friends are telling me that I come off as a braggart, just most unproductive reaction is for me to say, well, you're just jealous of how awesome I am, goodbye. If I did that, I may not have any friends left. Which might be an ok choice for some, but not an ok choice for me.

When some one tells me something that ruffles me up, I've found it's good to take a second, breathe, and really examine why it ruffles me up. It's an opportunity to learn something about myself, or maybe learn something about the other person.

[SchoolisHard]

Never preface anything in that manner. Even if you are showing somebody an "awesome" Michael Jordan video, it makes more sense to tactfully say "I hope you like this, too."