Reality check - a process of aligning your life with purpose beyond conditioning

[Ralph]

Hi there! I've recently developed an awesome five-step process for getting over the social conditioning and aligning with true purpose of life. I wrote a 4000 words article about it on my blog, but I'd like to share it with more people to spread the positive change wider. Obviously I have an evil purpose in this - I can't wait for feedback! If you've tried this, please share your experiences!





The longer you're in the doing, the more assumptions you make around your goals and their achievement. Soon you think you have it all figured out, and from your current perspective it sure seems so. If you would try to rearrange your goals, you'd get a similar life plan. And so you feel stuck and confused. Reality check is something more than a check-up and rearrangement of your goals. It's a five-step process aimed to raise your awareness, interrupt the mental patterns and incorrect assumptions, bring your awareness to the true purpose in life and plan your life from there. You broaden your view and eliminate obstacles first and look around after. A frequent reality check is vital to ensure that you have chosen the right destination and you are headed straight at it.


Reality check vs life goals check


Don't makethe mistake of thinking that reality check is just thinking over your life purpose and choosing better goals. You can analyze your life all you want, but if you keep making the same unconscious assumptions, you will end up getting the similar answers.To see through your current flaws in thinking, you need to raise your own awareness. As uncle Einstein smartly put it, “a problem cannot be solved on the same level that it exists”. You might even raise your awareness for a moment and see the bigger picture, different from what you assumed it would be. But still, if you still hold the same limiting beliefs in your mind, they will eventually lead you astray.

Do you know what your life is really about? I challenge you to free yourself from your current perspective verify your reality wth the bigger picture. Realign with your soul and see from that level how well your mind and body operates. Don't follow your goals blindly, hoping that fulfillment awaits you at their achievement. You will likely end up getting there and asking 'Is this all there is? What's the point?'. Make sure your life's purpose is the real purpose why you're in this world. Make sure your goals are directly aligned with that purpose. Do the reality check!

Step one - open your chakras

This is a simple, yet extremely effective meditation practice. As a first step you want to release the energy stuck in your chakras, which is essential for getting a clear vision of your reality. I do it at least once a day. You'll get by with it once a month. If you think it's an evil work of satan or whatever, don't call it opening your chakras. I'm not going to challenge your fundamental belief system. Just reframe it so you can still benefit from it. Think of it as a renovation of the house of your soul and you're painting the different parts of your body in the right colors. Whatever works :-) Really, there's no dogma, mojo or hidden truth to it. You just play with colors on the body parts in your imagination and it makes you feel better.

If you're curious to read more about chakras, I strongly recommend Erin's article. Here I'll just cover the unclogging process sparing you as little detail as you need to get by. It's just a preparation for the reality check anyways.

There are seven major chakras in your body and each one is represented by a color:

• Root chakra - red color, in your feet, represents physical survival, sense of identity
• Sacral chakra - orange color, lower abdomen, represents emotional stability, sexual energy, creativity
• Solar plexus - yellow color, solar plexus, near the diaphragm, represents personal power and effectiveness, mental energy and focus
• Heart chakra - green color, heart and lung area, represents love, empathy, healing, connection to others
• Throat chakra - blue color, throat, represents communication, self-expression
• Third eye - deep blue, indigo, purple color, third eye, in your forehead, represents psychic abilities, intuition, clarity of thought
• Crown chakra - White or violet color, at the top of the head, represents connection with God, Universe, Divine, inner peace

Over the years the chakras became clogged, the energy got stuck inside them or whatever metaphor you'd like to use. A simple visualization exercise is enough to unclog it. For the first time it might take a few minutes per chakra, once you get good at it, it's just a few seconds each. Remember that it's all just a metaphor. You can imagine something completely different from what I suggest and get better results. Just stick to the corresponding colours, as there seems to be something fitting about them.

Imagine a ball of colorful light swirling in the corresponding place of each chakra. As the ball rolls, it gets brighter and brighter. A stream of energy flows from the universe through the ball. Over time it flows more and more freely and the ball gets brighter and brighter. The chakra opens. Start from the Root and end at the Crown. Keep visualizing until you get a sense that it's clean. This feeling is hard to describe, but once you feel it, you'll know it's there. It's like spending a day in the fog and suddenly stepping out of it into the clear vision. It's like having pressure on your arm for so long that you got used on it and then releasing it. It's like finally telling your buddy to brush his teeth more often after you put up with his breath for ages. Anyways, wait until it 'clicks' and move on to the next chakra.

Step two - stop thinking

The second step is to interrupt your thinking patterns. Focus entirely on the present moment and disidentify with the thinking mind and its story about who you are. You are the soul, the consciousness, the awareness beyond the thinking mind. You need to feel that intuitively before you go further. If you've been stuck in the conversation inside your mind for years, this may be challenging.

How do you know you are the awareness, not the thinker? it's simple. Ask yourself 'What is my next thought going to be?'. How could you ask yourself that? How could you perceive the thought? If you were the thought, you wouldn't be able to do that. You aren't the thinking mind if you can observe it. Play along with it for a while and listen to your thoughts. Don't identify, just listen as if it was a radio transmission. Then imagine you are turning the volume knob down and hear the radio gradually die out.

Once the thoughts disappear, the awareness of presence emerges. Perhaps for the first time in a really long time you are completely in the present moment, perceiving your office without mental judgement and the usual stream of thoughts. This is the state you want to hold. Don't let any thoughts interfere with it. You will often catch yourself striking up an inner dialogue and drifting away. It's normal, just keep doing your best. The open chakras make it much easier to stay in the present moment. Your mental clarity is higher than usual.

Another good way of going into the now is directing your focus on the body's energy field. Close your eyes and hold your hands in front of you without touching anything. Ask yourself: ‘How do I know that my hands exist when I close my eyes?’. Feel the subtle feeling of living warmth in your hands. Once you get it, feel it in the entire body. Don't analyze it, don't think about it. Just feel it. Focus on the sensory perceptions, not on the mental interpretations of them.

Never rush the second step of reality check. It's a crucial foundation for the step three. If you're impatient, it's a very sign that your thinking patterns are still there. Even if raising your awareness takes you an hour, it's totally worth it. Most often the longer it takes, the more miscalibrated you are. Some people need just a small shift and will go through this step in five minutes, while others need a complete turn-over and it will take them hours. I meditated three days for the first time but it's not neccessary

[Ralph]

Step three - realize your wholeness

This is something your mind wouldn't bear. Good thing that you turned it off in the second step, right? Realize that now, in this moment you are already whole. It might not seem so on the level of mind. You are programmed into the consumption 'Give me more' mindset. Look at the core of your being. You are the awareness, not the needy mind. As a soul, a presence you are whole in this very moment. No external event, achievement or posession can fulfill you. There is nothing you have to do first. Let go of all your social conditioning. You are already whole.

Basically you came on this world fulfilled and then people told you that you don't have enough and you are not good enough. This realization is the essence of the third step of reality check. Don't expect anything to make you whole. Your goal in life is not wholeness. You already have it. You've always had it, but the mind is deceived to want more. As you are sitting here, breathing, aware of the present moment, without analyzing anything or running through your mind-made life story - you are fulfilled.

Who are you without the mind? You are still yourself, as mind is not a part of you, it's a tool of you. Use it as a tool and don't seek fulfillment through the mind. The key word that you want to avoid is 'but'. Never 'but' your happiness. Who says you can't be happy if x or y happens? Does it really depend on external circumstances? Look inside yourself for the answer. Right now, in this present moment, in the core of your being, you are whole and fulfilled.

At this point, you can let go of any variation of the belief that you need to get or become something or someone in order to be happy. If you encounter internal resistance, let go of the thinking processes. Your mind will struggle with this idea. Yet don't you sense deep down in your heart that it is true?

If you are already fulfilled, what's the point of living? Life is not about making yourself whole, looking for lacking parts of your perfect identity. It's all about what you do as a fulfilled being. Once you get over the internal resistance and seeking happiness externally move on to step four.
Step four - your true purpose in life

What do you intend to do with your life now that you're already fulfilled? It's time to ask yourself this question. You might find the answer surprisingly far from what you've been doing :-)

Far too often people set need-oriented goals instead of desire-oriented ones. You may want something deeply, but restrain yourself because social conditioning tells you that one of your assumed needs has to be fulfilled first. This way you live in reaction, deprived of true purpose in life. This is all result of the conditioning that you have dropped during the first three steps. The answer that emerges now is something you truly want, something you could do for eternity and enjoy the process immensely. It can be vague, but you can just work on the possible clarifications later.

Perhaps some of the inner resistance and sense of lack is still inside you. If you were troubled about money, ask yourself "What would I do if I had all the money in the world?'. If you sought validation from people, ask 'What would I do if I would be totally famous and liked and had the best intimate partner on earth?'. Do you get the idea? Whatever you think you need, ask yourself what would you do if you already had it. Then go over the steps 1-3 again. You will realize that you either already have, or don't need at all, what this thing would provide you.

If the answer that comes up doesn't seem right, just get your mind out of the way and keep asking. Write all your answers in a text editor or on paper. It's important to write anything that comes up. Only this way you'll sustain a constant flow of answers instead of getting stuck with one you don't want. When you get the right answer, you'll know that it's your life purpose. You'll feel a certain emotional connection with it. Your soul will move when you hold it in your mind. You will get excited and eager to begin. Now all that's left is a one, final step. Don't stop at the fourth step or it all has been for nothing.

Step five - plan your life around the purpose

What you probably have at this point is a vague concept of your purpose of life. Unless you integrate and interpret it, all you have are a few inspiring words in your text editor. You want a visible positive change in your lifestyle.

This one was mine by the way:

Love unconditionally
Be in a resourceful state of mind and body
Explore the most of this world
Keep the truth of my real nature in mind
Share the best of me with the world

Another similar vague concept I received in answer was 'Live in alignment with seven growth principles', referring to the principles described in the book book 'Personal Development for Smart People' by Steve Pavlina, which I find as an extremely insightful book.

What's left to do is to translate such concept into do-able actions. You want to create a bridge between your new purpose and your everyday life. Review your habits and beliefs. Which of them have to be replaced? What would you want to replace them with? Those are the foundations of your life. It's crucial to realign them. Think about every area of your life and consider how it relates to your purpose. What vision of each area would be a manifestation of it? Consider at least your:

* Health and fitness
* Finances
* Career
* Mental development, learning
* Any big hobbies you might have
* Relationships
* Spiritual practice

Describe in writing what does your life aligned with the purpose look like. Create a list of all noticable shifts and actions that you are committed to do. Capture in writing anything that will help you align with the new purpose. Any kind of plan, resource, change, assumption. Just go crazy and write your butt off.

If you find your commitment low or average, something isn't right. Spend more time reviewing your purpose and letting go of conditioning until you get totally pumped up emotionally. Then make a commitment to follow through and write as much as you can.

Why all the writing? What if you don't like to write? Perhaps you're too lazy and prefer to do it all in your head. Writing is a crucial part of this step. Once you get on with your life, you will be once again exposed to the conditioning. Old patterns may reemerge and new negative ones will be formed. You need a firm base to return to. You have to keep it all on writing and remember that you wrote it in a very uplifted state so it is most probably true. Doubts are bound to come and you need to capture this turnaround to have a fixed orientation point on the horizon.

So how do you like the reality check process? Eager to use it? Your mind will probably start building up reasons as for why shouldn't you try it. It just tries to prevent you from alignment with the soul and disidentification with mind. Why don't you just cut off all the excuses and try it anyways? Worst case - you'll feel slightly empowered. Best case - your life will completely turn around towards joy and fulfillment. Not a bad deal, is it?

I want you now to find at least an hour to commit to this process without any interruptions. Schedule it and cross that hour from your life in advance. Never accept any reason to move it from the schedule. It's a done deal.

Now that you planned when to follow through, consider every minute between now and that hour as at least partially wasted. You could have been living in the fulfillment and alignment with your true purpose of life if you hadn't procrastinated on the reality check! I hope this made your life more joyful :-)


Ralph