A Darkworker Tempted me to the Dark Side.....

[carnelian heart]

I've had several relationships with chaotic, self-obsessed, traumatized men, and after a while, I felt myself change. The Lightworker and Darkworker terms make a lot of sense to me, so please read on and let me know what happened to me!!!

Originally, the Darkworkers would say things like "You're so innocent," and "You're such an angel - what did I ever do to get to be with you?" and "we're like Beauty and the Beast." I'm very much a Lightworker.

After a while, in which I was manipulated, lied to, cheated on, stole from, coerced, and other things, I became so angry that I did some vengeful things that I regret, in an attempt to try to hurt them as they hurt me.

I now know that is not the right path, and thankfully, it is the only time I walked down that path, and it was not very far.


How did I almost become a Darkworker in the mix of emotions?

Does it really work like that?

Do relationships between Darkworkers and Lightworkers ever convert one to the other side?

[Destine4destiny]

Originally Posted by carnelian heart

I've had several relationships with chaotic, self-obsessed, traumatized men, and after a while, I felt myself change. The Lightworker and Darkworker terms make a lot of sense to me, so please read on and let me know what happened to me!!!

Originally, the Darkworkers would say things like "You're so innocent," and "You're such an angel - what did I ever do to get to be with you?" and "we're like Beauty and the Beast." I'm very much a Lightworker.

After a while, in which I was manipulated, lied to, cheated on, stole from, coerced, and other things, I became so angry that I did some vengeful things that I regret, in an attempt to try to hurt them as they hurt me.

I now know that is not the right path, and thankfully, it is the only time I walked down that path, and it was not very far.


How did I almost become a Darkworker in the mix of emotions?

Does it really work like that?

Do relationships between Darkworkers and Lightworkers ever convert one to the other side?

Most times when you let your emotions take over your mind gets clouded and you lose sight of who you are, I like to call it a diluted version of you. If your spirit is not strong and you are not in the moment you will not see what is really taking place right before your eyes- does it really work like that I believe you can answer that question for yourself. I hope this is helpful to you!

[Cran]

You didn't "nearly become a darkworker". Dark- or lightworking is a conscious choice you're making yourself, nothing you drift into because of bad company. Your company might influence you to make a certain conscious choice, but you won't drift into it. And darkworking is not per se the wrong path or evil. You know, from my point of view, the Jedi are evil...

Taking negative actions is not necessarily a sign of the darkworker, because things like stealing, dealing out hurt is seldomly the best way to go, because the effects will most likely come back to the person that deals it out.
You can take negative, emotional actions in each polarization (yes, also a lightworker can have his "blackouts" when he's hurt) and without one. I actually doubt that person whom you're talking about was polarized, it was probably just a very un-developed person with a bad character or emotional hurt.

Your issue has, in my eyes, therefore NOTHING to do with polarization. You got mixed up in an emotional whirlwind and got carried away, being hurt, trying to hurt others. No polarization there. Stop blaming outward things for your own mistakes.

[Plato]

It's easier to think of it in terms of scarcity and abundance mindsets.

Did these relationships sway you towards a scarcity mindset?

Being a darkworker is when you have an extreme scarcity mindset, to the point where fear drives you to action. Being a lightworker is where you interpret such abundance in the world that you have no fear, and can act purely from love.

You probably weren't ever a lightworker: would somebody with an abundance mindset get involved with these guys in the first place? Only you can answer that.

[SimonaRich]

This happened because you are still not conscious of all the emotions that you have. Because of that some negative emotions can still overtake you without you even noticing that.

When someone does something wrong to you and you respond by doing something wrong to them, this is your ego fighting back.

Your ego has been hurt and thus it tries to regain the lost power by fighting back at the person that hurt you.

Most people identify themselves with their egos, but this is not who they are.

[carnelian heart]

Originally Posted by Plato

It's easier to think of it in terms of scarcity and abundance mindsets.

Did these relationships sway you towards a scarcity mindset?

You probably weren't ever a lightworker: would somebody with an abundance mindset get involved with these guys in the first place? Only you can answer that.

Hi Plato. These relationships did steer me towards scarcity because the guys stole a lot of my money and dignity. And of course anyone could have ended up with these guys, who lied about who they were and showed me a much different face than their true ones.

What I took away from this is that lightworkers must keep choosing to remain above the muck, and work through it without mucking themselves up. I suppose it is just part of growing up and receiving more challenges.

[magi13]

learn from this experience. your tools are improved with this knowledge at your disposal.

[Eric Roosevelt]

Most people change when they're challenged or provoked by other people in the way you describe. It's a natural instinct to defend yourself. You're not unique in this regard. However, the important thing isn't what you've done in the past, but what your intentions are right now. Forget whatever minor offenses you have commited. They're probably not important to anything else that you do in your life. Just shift your focus to your positive intentions for today, tomorrow, next week etc. Don't get bogged down with labelling yourself a "lightworker" or a "darkworker", "good" or "evil". You are what you are. The important thing is to accept yourself, love yourself, make peace with the past and move your attention away from whatever's holding you back. These emotions you're feeling are temporary and will eventually pass. "The dark side" isn't some sort of permanent label which is assigned to you. It's just a self-image that you've created in your mind.

[jaydeschizo]

Originally Posted by carnelian heart

I've had several relationships with chaotic, self-obsessed, traumatized men, and after a while, I felt myself change.

That's your problem right there. You have relationships with traumatized self-obsessed people. The whole darkworking vs lightworking thing is being take out of context all the friggin' time.

Dark is not evil, light is not good. It's a conscious choice you make.

[Angela Leeds]

Carnelian...maybe it would be helpful to set the "lightworker" and "darkworker" concepts aside for the moment, at least as you define them.

If you allowed yourself to be deceived by this man, then it points to pockets of unilluminated shadow in your own mind...and this "darkworker" has given you the opportunity to own that and shine some light there. If you identify "lightworker" as somehow meaning just doing good for others, or of being of service to others, and being "loving" and "peaceful" and these other noble traits, you are missing the golden opportunity here. In fact, you have a blind spot, in your understanding or your beliefs, and this guy has ironically been quite a lightworker for you in that he's shining a spotlight straight toward where your dark patches are...

For you to see this in yourself and grow in awareness & understanding is the great potential gift of this exchange. When you shine the light in your own consciousness and do the work necessary to acquire greater discrimination, you'll cease being capable of being deceived as you have...and you'll progress another notch toward authentically being the "lightworker" you desire to be!

[pyrogen]

>Carnelian...maybe it would be helpful to set the "lightworker" and "darkworker" concepts aside for the moment, at least as you define them.

Yep. Makes me wanna barf, it's the new "the devil made me do it".

The problem with being someone like Steve is that once you reach a certain level of reknown you have a responsibility to the masses that follow you. This whole lightworker/darkworker thing is not constructive and is obscuring the point for a lot of people.

Boy, if I were going to be a guru as a "Darkworker" as it's defined by half of this community (which isn't the construction of Darkworker I agree with anyway), I'd throw out a whopper like that - "OK! some y'all are darkworkers and some y'all are lightworkers and the rest of y'all are the middlin's - talk amongst yourselves!" - just to get my "minions" to fight amongst themselves. Not saying Steve is a Darkworker. Just saying it'd be an awfully good strategy, mua ha ha ha ha.

[Angela Leeds]

LoL...yes, spot-on, pyro.

The LW/DW threads I have peaked in on have been so confused & convoluted, filled with constant bickering over meaning & nuances.

It's really as simple as LW=someone whose intention is to create from an evolving place of Love, Oneness, Power, and Truth, and DW=someone whose intention is to create from a place of fear, separation, control, and deceit.

Barring the shades of realized grey that we are along the way, that's it. It has nothing to do with "self vs service" or any such nonsense, because it is all one. I mean if there is truly Oneness, how could service to self be any different from service to others? Anyway, that's the sort of distinction not being made, which seems to be causing a lot of confusion 'mongst the peeps here.

<<BTW, still snorting over "devil made me do it...">>

[pyrogen]

Originally Posted by Angela Leeds

It's really as simple as LW=someone whose intention is to create from an evolving place of Love, Oneness, Power, and Truth, and DW=someone whose intention is to create from a place of fear, separation, control, and deceit.

I don't even agree with THAT construction of "lightworker vs darkworker", unless we're willing to agree there are more polarities than just that particular one.

I have had LW/DW collapsed with a different concept, that of enlightenment via transcendence (rising above the flesh) vs enlightenment via embodiment (diving right into the flesh and the baser realities of humankind), which is probably close to the definition of right handed vs left handed paths.

[Angela Leeds]

Oh yes...well, the world is constructed from so many types of polarities, who could count? I love the subject...

Are you saying the LW/DW paradigm people think that's the only polarity there is?

Ridiculous. Crikey...we should start a thread just to see how many different sorts of polarities we could come up with!