Zero at Christmas

[daveangeles]

So tonight's Christmas eve and I'm just taking stock of my life right now, of how far I've come since last Christmas.

I feel like I've done a huge amount of personal improvement, and I'm proud of that. I'm a better public speaker, I'm confident and completely spontaneous around others, and I'm working on not constantly spending my money on trivial things.

On the downside, I feel like my real world social circle has dwindled. It makes me kinda feel sorry for myself. For a while I had some pretty cool professional success (I work in entertainment; david angeles is just a pseudonym) -- I focused too much on this. I drifted away from my high school friends, and some of my college buddies resented my newfound success.

Eventually the success faded, but now I don't feel like I have many good friends in my life. I'm only 21 but still it feels rough at times.

David Angeles

[Angela]

Well, David, you've got us. and that new sentimental peculiar guy, Dereck. Hell, EVERYbody's sentimental on Christmas Eve.

You're cool, you're interesting, you're well-spoken, you're self-searching. Under the tree in the morning, Santa will have left you a brand spankin' new intention, ready for you to take a test-drive in the new year. I have every confidence that your new winter's intention will sail you right into a scintillating and loving circle of friends. She said mixing her metaphors. Ho ho ho!

Now it's time for me to go do the family thing - yay!

Merry Christmas with lots of love from your atheist pal,
Angela

[ReallyGoodIdeas]

Hey david(or whoever you are!),

I know what you're talking about. Since I left corporate life to teach EFT etc, I've left a lot of friends behind. I didn't get invited to any work Christmas parties this year and my 'friend' numbers have shrunk.

But you know? The people who've "dropped off" were never my friends. Or they'd still be around. I'm glad to have met some new friends through this site, and the sorts of coincidences that I-M is all about. And for that i'm very glad. So i know it's easy to get sentimental at Christmas, but, chin up and make yourself an intention for new like-minded friends. It's working for me! :-)

Joy to you, my friend!
Hazel

[Alvin]

David, you're a nice guy, so I'm going to take a different tack from being encouraging

I've been where you are, and the realization you have a problem is a good one, because you need to get this handled. I had lots of stuff going for me, but not a lot of friends, and that's when I realized I had to keep in touch with people. Not a bad thing to do, right?

So I make the effort more to call, message, email, msn. It's nice to have this part of my life expand and I plan more, I hope you and get the same (or more!)

[joshbickford]

There is a flipside to not keeping up with your friends, they aren't keeping up with you either. It's a two way street.

There was a time in my life when everyone wanted to be my friend, but it's cause everyone saw me as rich. My business failed soon afterward and I didn't have any friends anymore. Everyone left me just as quickly as they all appeared.

Friends come and go, the ones that make the effort to be your friend all of the time are the ones you should stick with. They are your true friends.

[Angela]

Josh, I've had friends who, upon seeing them after an absence of years, we light each other up as if it had been yesterday. I think, because of the way life goes, you can lose track -- and not be making any effort in their direction -- yet the love you have for each other doesn't go away, it just lies dormant at the base of your spine, like the herpes virus.

Also, I think some True Friends are in your life for just a short while. Those short-termers can be every bit as valuable, in their way, as the ones that stick around till you're decrepit. Forcing companionship (or emails, or phone calls) on that kind of pal robs you both of freedom. It's an act of love to let 'em go.

But I understand what you mean about the fair-weather friends. They need to have their little heads pinched.