The world is a disappointment

[catalyst]

It sounds like you're looking to find reasons why you should be unhappy. Surely, if you look, you will find it.

The world you complain about is the one you created. The world doesn't exist to make you happy. Do you deserve more from the outside world, and why?

[funchy]

Perhaps you're suffering from a bit of burnout? Plenty of people get in a rut. You can get out of it, but you need to be willing to make some big changes. It's ok to feel crummy about things. I don't blame you. But it doesn't have to stat this way.

The overall outlook does sound like something between apathy to depression. If you still can't figure out why you're stuck, there is no shame in talking to a counselor. Sometimes you need to get everything out in order to see the things you're not able to see right now.

Part of it is just outlook. Life is as good or as bad as you want ot see it. You can't control how you feel, but you can control how you think. If something happens, force yourself to think about the positive not the negative. Thinking about the positive enough will filter down into your feelings and your mood will lighten.

Exercise does a world of worder, even if it appears pointless. Sign up for an exercise class and force yourself to go 3x a week and not miss any sessions. It's a medical fact exercise does help with mood. And if nothing else, if you're busy, you wont' have time to think about how dreary everything seems.

[Breezy]

I've read some interesting thoughts here, despite the fact that I thought this thread would die due to my arrogance. I wish I could reply to all who posted, but instead I will say that the responses made me think. I am now trying to decide whether it is a good thing and, secondly, where did things go wrong.

[Acting Like Godot]

Basically, the "doldrums" are emotional in nature. If you feel that life sucks / is disappointing / is boring / lacks meaning etc etc .... well, essentially that's a feeling.

Some people are better than others at managing their own feelings. Using the terminology of Howard Gardner's multiple intelligences theory, we identify the relevant intelligence to be "intrapersonal intelligence".

If you have a high degree of intrapersonal intelligence, you are better at managing your own emotions, attitudes and thoughts. If you are lacking in intrapersonal intelligence, you are at the mercy of your own mood swings.

And you are caught on the low end of a prolonged mood swing, that is all.

[wolfgang]

Originally Posted by Acting Like Godot

Basically, the "doldrums" are emotional in nature. If you feel that life sucks / is disappointing / is boring / lacks meaning etc etc .... well, essentially that's a feeling.

Some people are better than others at managing their own feelings. Using the terminology of Howard Gardner's multiple intelligences theory, we identify the relevant intelligence to be "intrapersonal intelligence".

If you have a high degree of intrapersonal intelligence, you are better at managing your own emotions, attitudes and thoughts. If you are lacking in intrapersonal intelligence, you are at the mercy of your own mood swings.

And you are caught on the low end of a prolonged mood swing, that is all.

What do those theories say about how to control emotions or gain this intelligence?

Part of the equations, I would think, need to touch on how trying to control emotions can become an excessive response that leads to either suppressing bad feelings or glorifying good feelings.

Sometimes trying to control emotions can also be what makes them wild.

[ar81]

Satisfaction = Performance - Expectations

Disappointment = Negative satisfaction

It means that either performance is too low or expectations are too high.
The world works as it works.
So we either change it to make it perform better, or we lower our expectations.
What is certain is that living in disappointment is wasting out chance to be happy.

People tell you you can't change the world.
When you open a door you are changing the world.
When you make a phone call, when you breath...

So it depends on what context you need to change.
Usually the hardest thing is to change inside of us, because of those blind spots.

[Persephone79]

Ah, I have a diagnosis for you my friend! You're lacking spirituality Breezy! You are the epitome of the atheistic/non spiritual human being who focuses all they have on the material/everyday life concerns, succeed tremendously and then when they get there they feel an emptiness they can't explain. Sound like you?

Heres what to do honey;

Look at the Earth itself - nature, the animals, the weather. Look up at the sky, try to count how many stars there are, imagine how massive the universe is and how infinite it is!! Then ask yourself if it really all came here by itself? The answer to that of course is that it didn't - the likes of me and otehrs like me know that but you don't believe it yet! Y'see what seems to be happening with you here is that you are slowly waking up to the path that I and most other spiritually minded people are on and have been on for quite a while. Relax dude, you're alot further along it than my ex boyfriend believe me! You are at the gates and are being invited in Come...join us !!

You have now learned that no matter how much material/earthly success you have gained, something inside craves something else but doesn't know what it is.

Well I can tell you what it is - spirit, a deeper meaning, the realisation that you, I and everything else are part of something magnificent, beautiful, wonderful, incredible. Sound a bit too much like New Age crap to you? Fair enough, stew some more, you'll be feeling like you are for a long time to come then!

I'm not suggesting that you start dancing naked in the moonlight, go to church every Sunday and start preaching in the streets, however I think perhaps now is a good time to start exlporing the spiritual a little bit more. Let it into your life.

I suggest you start with a good secular meditation cd I highly recommend Glenn Harold (Diviniti Publishing) Take time out to connect with your inner self, your spirit. The part of you that isn't wearing a suit and frequenting expensive wine bars etc. Try to recognise that you actually have a spirit and that there is indeed more to life than you have experienced so far. Another good way to do this is to spend some time in nature - in a park and/or with animals. Have you ever watched the birds? (The feathered variety....) They're really funny to watch, it's like a soap opera sometimes! They fight, cuddle up together, feed, build nests, socialise and mess about. I'm being deadly serious - watch a few interacting with each other next time you're in a woody area and you'll see what I mean! Even the pigeons can be pretty funny.

Being spiritual has very little to do with religion. It is more about opening your eyes and your awareness up to the aspects of life that don't come made of concrete or gold. Maybe you could take an astronomy class or buy a book on it to open your heart to the enormity of the universe we live in.

I am spiritual and I will ask that you are helped and guided, as what you describe sounds like such a horrible feeling. You may laugh and tell me not to bother but hey, what have either of us got to lose? It's worth a shot!

Part of me feels you will read my post and go "Oh shut up!" But because there is a part of me that hopes you will read it and try out some of my advice I post it anyway!

My advice is given freely. I am almost certain it will help you but you are totally at liberty to use it or reject it. Lots of love xx