University or Entrepreneurship

[Kindred]

In a nutshell: I’m going to university, because my father wants me too. Even though I have strong entrepreneurial aspirations, and want to share my ideas and creations with the world.

Communication between my father and I is very poor. I’ve tried talking to him about my ideas and feelings I have for business ventures, but he ends up changing the subject instantly to scholarships, bursaries, awards to pay for my university. So I’ve ended up searching ruthlessly for scholarships for 1-2 hours every morning when I get up at 5 AM, then work on scholarship essays later throughout the evening amongst my homework (which I don’t have much of a problem with, I love to write). I tell him how many scholarships I’ve found and which ones I’ve applied for, but he keeps saying to get more. It never ends. I’ve already been accepted into the university’s Bachelor of Science program (in computer science) by the way. I have to get enough money to pay for it by September.

My father makes less than $16,000 a year, he’s over 65, self-employed, and supporting us by himself. My sister and brother moved out 3 years ago, after my family broke up. My sister is pumping gas with a college certificate for something she really wanted to do, and no one will even hire her with it. My brother (straight A’s through high school, and who won many scholarships) dropped out of university for a job he really wanted to do, even though the pay would be far less than what he was studying for. My father thinks they turned out as complete failures, and won’t even talk to them anymore. I’d like to think I understand a little bit of why he wants his youngest son to go to university, get a degree, and then get a “secure” job starting at $70,000 a year. But I’m still young and naïve and I know that I don’t even know a fraction of his thoughts.

However something finally clicked in my mind the other day, and I asked myself, “Why am I doing all this work for something I don’t even want? Why am I focusing all this energy on everything but what I really want to do?” That’s when I realized something. I may highly enjoy programming, and doing other geeky hobbies in my spare time. But I never really wanted to become a programmer in the first place, it’s not congruent with who I am.

I definitely understand freelancing and business ventures are highly risky. And because he’s getting too old, that my father will need someone dependable to help support him within the decade. But getting a degree is not congruent with who I am, I have burning desires to share my ideas and creations with the world. Working at a desk job for an employer is never going to let me do that to the fullest possible extent.

So my question is: should I go to university in September and deny myself of what I really want to do, is there something else I can do that is congruent with me, or should I just begin trying my hand at freelancing and several business opportunities? The problem with the later is I’m turning 18 in September. My dad said he won’t accept me waiting a year before I go to university; under no circumstances. I could try doing it during university, but university will still end up as a huge waste of money (just for something I can learn on my own, and for a piece of paper!) and also the financial debts from student loans that will hinder me from getting potential businesses off the ground.

[missing]

as much as I hate to make judgments about people I've never met and only heard about second hand on an anonymous online forum, from what you are telling us, your dad sounds like an @$$hole. Won't talk to your other siblings cause they are failures? Did they do something horrible to him? So he's old and doesn't make much money and wants somebody to be successful to take care of him. Sorry but that's his problem not yours. Was that his prime motivation for having kids anyway? To support him? I wouldn't consider his opinion on anything you do. You're 18, doesn't that make you a legal adult? You can make your own decisions, and the debt you accrue at university will be legally yours, not his. Aside from that, based on what you are telling us you're highly likely to end up like your siblings anyway. Might as well take a chance on something freelance now, especially if you think you are smart, and your heart is in it. That said, be prepared for your Dad to shut you out. You will have to support yourself. You have to ask yourself if you can handle that. But you are speaking like you owe him something, but you don't, least of all being miserable on a path you hate.

[technologyslice]

Do both. Go to college and pursue entrepreneurship. A degree not only helps you get employment, it is also an experience.

[Kevin Givens]

It sounds like you've got a really good head on your shoulders for 17. Education is important, especially in business. There's no reason you can't go for a business or marketing degree while pursuing your own ventures part-time.

I also understand that you may rather work full time on your dreams. I'm the same way. I had about a year of college left when I dropped out. I still want to eventually get that degree (as a personal goal), but right now I want to focus fully on developing my own business that will free my time and build financial freedom.

You're absolutely right to consider all the debt you might incur getting that piece of paper. A lot people go through four (or more) years of college and still don't feel satisfied in that profession. If you KNOW what you want, you're way ahead of your peers.

You need to find a way to open up communication with your father. Even though he may feel angry about your decision at first, eventually he'll come to accept it. Tell him you want to try entrepreneurship for a year, if it doesn't work out you can always go to school.

Keep us posted on what you decide. Good luck!

[Doku]

You have already done a ton of work to get all of those scholarships. My advice would be this: Go to college. Talk with the administration there. I would start with the Dean of Student Life, and go from there. (Dean of Student Life in college = Guidance Councilor in high school)

I would let them know that your chances of graduating from there is essentially zero, and that what you really want to do is be an Entrepreneur. You have done all of the work to get all of the scholarships, and have proven that you have the drive and work ethic to start a business and make it work. You would like to take classes that would help you ensure the success of your business. See if you can take some classes from the school's MBA program, as well as some classes in whatever field your business will be based in.

While you are in school, get a job. Work in the industry that you will start your business in... That way, when you start, you will already know some of the do's and don'ts w/o having to shell out tons of cash while you make mistakes.

You already have the first year of college paid for... that doesn't mean that you have to take the freshman "busywork" classes.

[ellie]

You got to do what you want to do. Your an adult, and you will regret it later in life if you made decisions based on guilt and pleasing your father.

My father was in the same situation as you, having his father trying to push him to do something that wasn't suited to him LAW, and caring only about money. The only thing I saw it do to my father was make his make his career shakey, because he was always trying to peruse careers that didn't fit him. It also mentally effected him. If he pursued something more suited to him and didn't bow to the pressure of his father I'm sure he would have had a more stable career.

So listen to what you really want. Everyone saying go to "college", but if your hearts not in it, it's really going to be a waste. But maybe just give it a go for a month or so, and you can always defer if it's just not right at this stage.

Also, this is just from my perspective. I too believe I am a entrepreneur at heart, but I went to university and have worked the 9-5 job for a while. I however, always had the desire to go to uni, never thought I would as I pretty much failed high school. I needed to prove to myself that I did have some brains. Anyway, what I now know is working for 9-5 job for someone else just doesn't suit me and basically I was just delaying the inevitable. However, with uni I found it to be invaluable for me, I have picked up so many skills, that have given me a good grounding in a number of areas. Now I have done a few courses, ones I really hated like "accounting" which just didn't suit me at all. But the final course I choose multimedia was the one I loved because it really suited me. I had great friends, teachers and the work was so satisfying, but again it was a course that really suited me, so it made me happy.

So if you do go to uni, do what you love, not what your father wants because you probably just end up dropping out anyway.

Now back to the entrepreneur, so the last few months I have really said to myself, "right I'm going to do all the ideas that have come to my mind over the years and also any new thoughts that have come to my mind". So I have done a tone of projects and actually seen them through. Most don't work, some I can slowly see working...but the main thing I have found is that it is SO satisfying doing what I want to do. I just get excited with my ideas, and they seem to become more readily now and it's great feeling. Maybe none of my ideas will work, but just doing them is a great sense of achievements and satisfaction. I probably wasn't ready to peruse my entrepreneurial ways when I was younger, but now I'm making the time and using all the skills I have picked up at uni and the work place to create my own projects. Best thing I have done in a long time and really feels suited to me.

[RT Wolf]

I can sympathize with you. I too went to unviersity simply because it was expected of me. What actually ended up happening was I gained enough courage to simply say, "Why am I doing tihs if I hate it? To get a job I hate? To retire and hate that, too? To die forgotten?" and I stopped going to classes. Of course, they don't like that much and I failed my first year. It was also during that time that I discovered Steve's site. I took a year off and focussed on growing and improving myself. After that year, I'm back. However, I hvaen't had a decent conversation with my brother in almost two years now. He thinks kinda like your father does. He also recently scored a 99% on his GMAT, so he's a high achiever. I don't think he'd handle failure well, so he projects that onto me.

This might help:
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/200...relationships/

Coming back, I've accepted that I don't like a lot of what school is about (writing useless essays, I'm for writing interesting ones, but not useless ones), boring readings, or what have you. I do love learning though, and I've gone so far as to attend classes that are interesting to me just cause I wanted to learn that, without actually being enrolled in that class. You can definitely do that by dropping by some commerce/business classes and just getting an education on the side.

Other stuff i've done is reduced my courseload to about 60% of full (so 5 courses is full, I'm taking 3). This is about enouhg for me to be able to handle schoolwork easily and get decent grades. I don't really want to use my degree to get me a job, so I really only care about what I learn. With this courseload, I also have plenty of time to pursue whatever interests I feel like. I dunno what your entrepreneurial ideas are, but I doubt that they can't work around a few hours of class a week + a few hours of studying. I also only take interesting classes and aim for good profs (using sites like ratemyprofessor.com, and info from my school). Good profs can make or break a course. There's no point in taking a course without a good prof, cause you can just as easily get a textbook (for much cheaper) and learn from that.

University has been a great environment for me, intellectually. Depending on what you study (and I recommend studying a broad, broad range of things), it can really help you learn to think in certain ways. A few days ago this was really driven home to me when I was having a discussion about religion with someone studying engineering, and he could barely put together a coherant argument. That's not to say that engineering is a bad thing for constructing arguments, or that he was a representative sample from engineering, but just to suggest that you get different kind of education if you've gone to uni versus if you haven't. As an example, there was someone who posted recently about university being a scam. The first thing you learn in uni is that unless you want your arguments to be obliterated, be careful what position you want to defend, and be sure to back up your position well.

Having a degree is also personally important to me, as well as important to me that my family be happy.

All of this assumes that you love learning. That's not necessarily the case and you're not a bad person for doing that.

For you, if you decide to go to uni, i would suggest taking a reduced courseload, and move out of your home. If you can, move at least to the next city. That in itself will be a great learning experience for you, even if you're a bit apprehensive of that.

I don't tell this story much (if at all), but I think you might get a lesson from it. Maybe the lesson is to be more compassionate about your father's position. I would suggest you go ahead and go to university, and continue your entrepreneurial aspirations. In fact, university is a great environment in some ways. Not only are you surrounded by smart people (which can help you become smarter), but there's opportunities to find partners (bill gates found his partner at uni, I belive). Depending on whether you get scholarships or just student loans, you get four more years of a relatively risk-free environment to make mistakes, and you'll make many, many of those.

These are the reasons why i'm back in university. In fact, teh question of not coming back never even occured to me.

Furthermore, I'll ask you this: What are your entrepreneurial ideas? What have you done about htem? Have you started something? Do you plan to start something? When? If you haven't done anything about them yet, why not? An entrepreneur quickly learns to make do with what they have, so I doubt there are many reasons that are good enough.

That's a tough call. What you're really worried about is your emotional reaction to your father's emotional reaction to your decision.

Good luck! Feel free to PM me if you have quesitons or wahtever. Sorry if my post is a little disjointed, its been a long day.

[norbert]

I chose not to go to uni 5 years ago. After being an employee for some months I became an entrepreneur. Now I am 24 and I have failed a lot (and had some success besides). I can tell you I am quite happy that I started failing 5 years ago so now I have some idea about what works and what doesn't (about businesses too but especially about myself). In the past years I have discovered what I like to do, what I want and how I want it.

On the other hand, as an entrepreneur, I spend lots of time alone and at home. There's no place to go and no people to meet on a daily basis. I miss the years when I was a student and employee.

Most businesses need lots of attention and work in the beginning. I don't think most people have enough time to build up a successful business besides uni.

Another thing to consider is that nobody guarantees you even 5 more years on this planet. I have lost my mum when she was 29 and my best friend at 21. I say go for it now, while you can.

I don't want to have any real regrets when I leave this planet. Most importantly, I want to be true to myself. That's what matters in the end I think.

Best of luck to you!

[ellie]

Hello, me again I stumbled across this great motivational speech to graduate college students by Steve Jobs, Apple and Pixar founder. I found it really inspirational and very true. Enjoy! I think it might help you, I know it did for me

YouTube - A nice motivational speech of Steve Jobs

[norbert]

I recommend this Steve Jobs speech too, it has helped me a lot as well.

[chopsaw]

I know a lot of people here say skip college and chase your dreams, etc. Yet, what gets me is that most successful entreprenuers (sp) are college grads. Most successful people I know put money away for their kids to go to school. Granted that Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, and some others didn't go the traditional route, but millions of others, like Donald Trump, have. In fact, Trump reveres a solid collegiate foundation.

To someone who wants to start a business. You had better love that business. Love it enough that you'd do it for nothing, and have a part time job to keep the wolf off the door. For the business to be a success it has got to be something you look forward to in the morning, are in a near state of euphoria while doing it, and at the end of the day (when you actually go to sleep) you've temporarily settled the demon that drives you. Then, of course, you've got to convince other people that what you do is worth their hard earned cash.

There are a number of reasons why most start-ups fail, one major reason is the "entrepreneurs" were ill-prepared for the task at hand.

While there are many who dream of a better life if they have their own business, be warned. Business can be rutheless. A good paying job, at the end of the day isn't so bad. And in the right job, you can make a positive difference in the world while seeing to your own needs. I'm not trying to scare anyone off. Being self employed can be very fulfilling, but it certainly isn't for everyone.

Be careful of what you wish for.

[Joely]

Your father sounds like my mother. He's worried about your security and your life and you having enough to eat - his experiences tell him that life is a particular way, so he's trying to protect you (in his own, bossy way) that this is the best thing for you.

I think, in the end, the choice is entirely up to you. There is nothing remotely safe about having a "regular job" (I speak from experience, and I think Steve Pavlina himself did a blog post on it). I had no qualifications in doing what I did as a contractor and yet I was able to pull in any job I wanted to do it. I do have a great academic background, but it has never had any relevance whatsoever to any jobs I've done.

I recall reading in another post on Steve's blog about how we go looking for advice one way or the other. I would write down the pros and cons, and think about how much the pressure from your father might well have coloured how you feel about going to college. Sit back and take a break from it, maybe write down all the negatives and positives. Then make up your own mind. In the end, it's your life and it's up to you. The only way to live is to take risks.

[RT Wolf]

Yay decision making. Making decisions is hard as hell, especially two strangely simirla options that cause a lot of cognitive dissonance.

Writing down pros and cons is one idea.

Other things include being able to find some sort of win-win situation, or some sort of trial situation in which you can try out both for a time to see which one you wnat more.

[norbert]

How to Make Smart Decisions in Less Than 60 Seconds

[Erock]

Hey, I'm not sure where you're coming from, or what type of person you are, but for me, going to college had absolutely nothing to do with an education. I truly just go to class because it satisfies my parents so they will pay the bill, but I could care less about what I'm learning or where it will take me.

What I went to college for, and what I truly enjoy, is the "college experience." I know it's cliche, but if you find a college that fits your needs, you can have an incredible time socially. I spend most of my time just hanging out with cool guys, trying to talk to girls, going to parties, big sporting events, playing intermural sports, playing videogames with large groups of guys, exc.

Like I said though, that's just me, maybe you have different priorities. I'm fairly extroverted, and besides being into spirituality, I'm a pretty normal dude. I actually don't think I would fit in with most of you guys in real life, haha, but hey, that's what the internet is for.

Erock

[uberinquisitive]

I highly recommend you go to college and immerse yourself in that experience.

College can only help your entrepeneurial tendencies. You may meet future business partners. You can join student groups. You may have a professor who really inspires you. You will learn how to socialize amongst diverse groups of people. Point is: college is more than just the academic studies.

You're 17 years old. You are allowed to ease into the "adult" world. I do entrepeneurial work...and it requires a lot of street smarts. If you've never done even your taxes before, being an entrepeneur will be that much tougher. I recommend you spend your early 20's figuring out your adult self. This will make you a much better business person.

[simplystephen]

Only you can find the answers you seek...there are many issues to consider and your education seems to be the least important. Our time here is limited, so how do you want to spend your time?

Heal your relationships, they will eat away at your heart and soul.

Now, for some direct thoughts - education is unforunately a perception that society has created. I have 3 college diplomas with honours but the true reason I took the courses was to discipline my learning, something I lack otherwise in some ways. Socially you may be less isolated with a degree and this is a good thing for an entrepreneur. Without University some opportunites are hard to initiate or totally out of reach. With it the perfect opportunity can arise.

If you want to be an entrepreneur, be an entrepreneurial student. What a way to network for 4 years. I am not an advocate for education but in your case it will open more doors.

As for your father, it may be too late to change his ways but you can change yours and that will affect the dynamics. Sometimes parents have aspirations for their children on where they feel they have failed. It is the only way they are able to express their love.

Whatever you choose, do it whole-heartedly and don't quit until you make it.

Good luck on all fronts.

[jtrikster]

I can definitely relate to your situation on certain levels. I'm reminded of myself actually. My dad has always pushed me to go to college. Our fathers aren't exactly the same, but they are similar in how they want their children to be successful and go to college.

I'm in my second year and over the years I've questioned why I'm here. I've also been very tempted to drop out because I too didn't feel I was doing what I really wanted to do. This semester changed all of that though.

My major is Health and Exercise/Sports science. I've always loved sports but I also have many other interests. Because of these other interests, they've tempted to leave the college life in pursuit of a entrepreneur-type career. After finishing most of my gen ed courses, I've finally begun to do things I've found more enjoyable. I'm beginning to take more health courses and I absolutely love them!! They have reminded me why the hell I'm here in the first place. I'm going to college to become a physical therapist and work in the health industry.

I'm actually beginning to do what I want to do! Another thing to is I still haven't put my entrepreneur tendencies on hold either. I own a business right now designing t-shirts and I plan later on in life to start my own business in the health industry. I don't know yet, but I'll get there when I get there.

In relation to your story, you are majoring in computer science. You also want to be a business owner. Well, I don't know what year you are, but stick it out for about another year or two. Really figure out if you still like computer science by taking those really awesome computer science courses. Remember, your first two years will roughly just be gen ed courses. Wait a little bit and see what you think about those computer science courses. If you find you really don't like it, well then you're in a better position to decide what you want to do. Major you can major in business.

Now, if you find that you really like those computer science courses, finish your major, get some work experience and start a company if you'd like. There are so many different kinds of businesses you can start with a CS degree.

[schola]

Why not do both? That's what I'm trying to do.

I just found out about many entrepreneurship programs and opportunities here at my university. I never would have guessed it either, but I just made the intention and poof.

Right now I'm interviewing for a job with a company that pays students to start and run their own businesses. Pretty sweet.

[Lauxa]

I don't think $70 k is a realistic starting salary for a computer science student with an undergraduate degree. It's quite possible after a few years of experience, though. Can you go to a community college (but not live at home) and take mostly online courses? If you do that and take a reduced courseload, you can still have tons of time for your entrepreneural ambitions.

As a previous poster said, there's a good chance you will be working a second job when first starting your business anyways. If you can make that second job school -- and get scholarships to pay for it -- that might not be so bad...

[jtrikster]

Originally Posted by schola

Why not do both? That's what I'm trying to do.

I just found out about many entrepreneurship programs and opportunities here at my university. I never would have guessed it either, but I just made the intention and poof.

Right now I'm interviewing for a job with a company that pays students to start and run their own businesses. Pretty sweet.

WOW!! What company are you trying to get a job with. I wouldn't mind getting paid for working my own business either

BEST OF LUCK!

[Carmen]

Hello, me again I stumbled across this great motivational speech to graduate college students by Steve Jobs, Apple and Pixar founder. I found it really inspirational and very true. Enjoy! I think it might help you, I know it did for me

YouTube - A nice motivational speech of Steve Jobs

Yes indeed, that is great find and very inspiring as well.

Carmen

[ken nubo]

This is not a black or white issue. YOu can go to University and be an entrepreneur.

Consider yourself a part-time entrepreneur, lol