i got fired today

[cally9096]

so how do i manifest a new job with a boss that isnt psychotic and treats her employees like they have some kind of value?

[dragonfly183]

close your eyes, relax, and imagine yourself in just that type of job. No one should have to put up with an abusive employer.

[Shamou]

cally... I have been following your threads... seems like you have a lot of problems... you get fired from your job, you have problems with anger and anxiety... your neighbors are bad... you have problem raising money for your license... and yet, you see yourself as the victim of all that... it just happened to you... don't you think that it is getting high time to have a good look in the mirror...???

If you want to solve your problems... you must look at the cause of all these problems... not at the results...

.

[Akashic_Librarian]

Mm yes, Ditto Shamou.

The problem is never your own fault...I have this problem myself. I blame everyone...even when its impossible for it to be someone else ( I am late for the bus, I am hungry [yeah seriously] etc...etc...)

[Love]

Hi Cally! Two questions:

What is it you want to do?
What will prevent the problems that you had with your employer this time?

[PMcDonald]

Kudos to you Shamou - you hit the nail on the head.

We have a quote that circulates amongst the entrepreneurs I work with and it is this -

"If it's meant to be it's up to me"

No one, absolutely no one, but you is going to change your results.

One of my favorite books is by Michael Losier called The Law of Attraction and the reason I love it is for its simplicity as well as the practical tools he provides but he talks alot about getting rid of the words don't, not, and no - basically erasing them from your vocabulary by stopping yourself when you hear those words and say to yourself "So, what do you want?"

Seems simple but it works.

So my challenge to you is the next time you are thinking about what you don't want or what is wrong, stop for a minute and start thinking about what you do want.

It is a much better place to be in.

Of course, there is the whole action thing where you can think about what you want all day but if there is no action, there is nothing. I think it is James Ray who says that if you sit on the couch all day just thinking about manifesting money without any action, pretty soon you'll be sitting on the floor.

Bottom line - figure out what it is that you want and then go get it. When you get down to it, it really is that simple.

[JohnPlace]

Originally Posted by Shamou

cally... I have been following your threads... seems like you have a lot of problems... you get fired from your job, you have problems with anger and anxiety... your neighbors are bad... you have problem raising money for your license... and yet, you see yourself as the victim of all that... it just happened to you... don't you think that it is getting high time to have a good look in the mirror...???

If you want to solve your problems... you must look at the cause of all these problems... not at the results...

.

I am reminded of this picture from demotivators.com: Dysfunction

Although the picture above is a bit of a joke, your message is right on. In my own life, I find it helpful to hold myself accountable for everything -- even if it's *not* my fault. Because, at the end of the day, I am the only person I can truly control.

The thing that many people don't realize is that victimhood is a position of powerlessness, while accountability is a position of power.

[Benny2]

Originally Posted by Shamou

cally... I have been following your threads... seems like you have a lot of problems... you get fired from your job, you have problems with anger and anxiety... your neighbors are bad... you have problem raising money for your license... and yet, you see yourself as the victim of all that... it just happened to you... don't you think that it is getting high time to have a good look in the mirror...???

If you want to solve your problems... you must look at the cause of all these problems... not at the results...

.

I agree with your suggestion. I had recently had to take my own inventory.

I suggest you ask yourself old question, "What was my role in this firing?"

Watch out for denial, for it will do whatever it has to do to protect you.

Denial can lead you to rationalize (lie to yourself) the whole thing away.

Do not be afraid to get professional help if you need it.

[Peter S C]

I agree with most of what the others have said and add this: see the firing as an opportunity to change yourself. If you don't make any changes then you will more than likely end up in a different job, but have the same problems...

All the best,

Peter

[Shamou]

Originally Posted by PMcDonald

Bottom line - figure out what it is that you want and then go get it. When you get down to it, it really is that simple.

You know Paul... that message is extremely simple... yet sometimes it takes years to grasp it...

Thank for reminding us of that fundamental truism...

.

[Shamou]

Originally Posted by JohnPlace

victimhood is a position of powerlessness, while accountability is a position of power.

John, I think I'm going to get a license plate with that inscribed on it... so very true...

.

[Angela]

Cally, all this tough love is probably not what you were expecting when you posted here. Being fired is extremely stressful, and I hope you're doing everything you can in the first couple of days to create peace and comfort for yourself (including maybe don't take any advice or admonishments too much to heart.) Give yourself a couple of days to just accept what has happened.

That said, if you are able and willing to take 100% responsibility for creating your life, this is a big milestone and opportunity for you to turn things around for yourself. My guess is that you've been focusing on what's wrong, and that has created a downward spiral in your life. Sometimes the best thing that can happen when you're in a downward spiral is a shocking occurence -- it can shake you up and give you whole new points of view on everything you're doing. That can give you Real Power, and you may look back on this episode as a turning point that began the rest of your creative, powerful, and joyful life.

Remember, you can't see it if you don't have it. When you think about the kind of job and boss you want to create next, think even more about what kind of person would have that job and that boss. Who would you have to Be to be the person who would fit your dream job? It is not the person you're Being right now. And most likely, what you're really passionate about is being the person you want to be, not working at a particular job or having a particular boss.

I am wishing you all kinds of success!

Love,
angela

[cally9096]

Originally Posted by Shamou

cally... I have been following your threads... seems like you have a lot of problems... you get fired from your job, you have problems with anger and anxiety... your neighbors are bad... you have problem raising money for your license... and yet, you see yourself as the victim of all that... it just happened to you... don't you think that it is getting high time to have a good look in the mirror...???

If you want to solve your problems... you must look at the cause of all these problems... not at the results...

.

Actually I dont feel like a victim. I look at all of these things as a learning experience. It is helping me to be a better person. I have learned alot because of my "problems".
When it comes to losing my job it was liberating and exactly what I wanted it has freed me and i feel good about it. Now I get to spend time with my children
And how do I have any control over my neighbors? When they moved in they were bad I had nothing to do with it. (the first clue was when they moved in at midnight) and it isnt just me it is the whole street that has a problem with them. And even after everything they have done I STILL pray for them every night that they find peace. But they will be gone soon and then I wont have to worry about them anymore.
And nope not having a "problem" raising money I just started saving to get my license and I will have all of the money I need within 3 weeks. I was just looking for advice on how to manifest it the right way.
Im sorry you think I have "alot of problems" but I think all of us have our share of problems and mine are minor in comparison to some people and I am grateful for that.

[JohnPlace]

Originally Posted by cally9096

Actually I dont feel like a victim. I look at all of these things as a learning experience. It is helping me to be a better person. I have learned alot because of my "problems".
When it comes to losing my job it was liberating and exactly what I wanted it has freed me and i feel good about it. Now I get to spend time with my children
And how do I have any control over my neighbors? When they moved in they were bad I had nothing to do with it. (the first clue was when they moved in at midnight) and it isnt just me it is the whole street that has a problem with them. And even after everything they have done I STILL pray for them every night that they find peace. But they will be gone soon and then I wont have to worry about them anymore.
And nope not having a "problem" raising money I just started saving to get my license and I will have all of the money I need within 3 weeks. I was just looking for advice on how to manifest it the right way.
Im sorry you think I have "alot of problems" but I think all of us have our share of problems and mine are minor in comparison to some people and I am grateful for that.

Cally, I've been "let go" from jobs 3 times in my life. It's never easy. Once was because I was a bad employee -- the other times were the result of corporate lay-offs.

Each time, I used it as an opportunity to learn and grow, just as you are doing. I find that a lay-off can make a person more receptive to new ideas, opportunities, and growth experiences.

Best wishes to you in your job hunt.

[cally9096]

Originally Posted by JohnPlace

Cally, I've been "let go" from jobs 3 times in my life. It's never easy. Once was because I was a bad employee -- the other times were the result of corporate lay-offs.

Each time, I used it as an opportunity to learn and grow, just as you are doing. I find that a lay-off can make a person more receptive to new ideas, opportunities, and growth experiences.

Best wishes to you in your job hunt.

Thank you John!
I was only there for a little over a month so it isnt a big deal.She had fired 8 people in the 6 weeks I was there (and she fired her brother and sister 2 weeks before I started) so it was a weird environment. What I have learned is to always go with my gut because when I went for the interview I got a bad feeling that I should have listened to oh well ya live and ya learn. I have been sending out my resume for the past few weeks so I am sure something better is just around the corner. But for now I am going to clean the house from top to bottom and get stuff ready for the summer.

[Shamou]

Originally Posted by cally9096

Actually I dont feel like a victim. I look at all of these things as a learning experience. It is helping me to be a better person. I have learned alot because of my "problems".
When it comes to losing my job it was liberating and exactly what I wanted it has freed me and i feel good about it. Now I get to spend time with my children
And how do I have any control over my neighbors? When they moved in they were bad I had nothing to do with it. (the first clue was when they moved in at midnight) and it isnt just me it is the whole street that has a problem with them. And even after everything they have done I STILL pray for them every night that they find peace. But they will be gone soon and then I wont have to worry about them anymore.
And nope not having a "problem" raising money I just started saving to get my license and I will have all of the money I need within 3 weeks. I was just looking for advice on how to manifest it the right way.
Im sorry you think I have "alot of problems" but I think all of us have our share of problems and mine are minor in comparison to some people and I am grateful for that.

Beautifully said cally... my hat goes off to you...

.

[JohnPlace]

Originally Posted by cally9096

Thank you John!
I was only there for a little over a month so it isnt a big deal.She had fired 8 people in the 6 weeks I was there (and she fired her brother and sister 2 weeks before I started) so it was a weird environment.

I worked in an environment like that once. In that particular case, I was not fired -- because I quit. It was an unhealthy work environment to be sure -- an affront to my mental health and to everyone's who worked there.

What I have learned is to always go with my gut because when I went for the interview I got a bad feeling that I should have listened to oh well ya live and ya learn.

What's funny is that I got the same feeling when I interviewed for my nightmare boss. That was the last time I ever accepted a job out of fear.

[cally9096]

Originally Posted by JohnPlace

I worked in an environment like that once. In that particular case, I was not fired -- because I quit. It was an unhealthy work environment to be sure -- an affront to my mental health and to everyone's who worked there.


What's funny is that I got the same feeling when I interviewed for my nightmare boss. That was the last time I ever accepted a job out of fear.

And that is why I accepted this job...out of fear. I will never do that again.Quitting wasnt an option because if I quit then I wouldnt be able to collect unemployment and now that I got fired I can! But I changed 2 peoples lives for the better while I was there and that makes me feel good and makes me wonder if that was why I was there to begin with. I also got to talk to some really interesting people (like a world renowned author) and I learned alot specially after reading his books (when bad things happen to good people is a must read!)

[cally9096]

Originally Posted by Shamou

Beautifully said cally... my hat goes off to you...

.

Thank you!

[gc3833]

Aren't all bosses psychotic, unless of course your the boss?! :-D

[{aspiring_to_clarity}]

Originally Posted by gc3833

Aren't all bosses psychotic, unless of course your the boss?! :-D

In my case, even moreso then .

[Breakaway]

Originally Posted by JohnPlace

What's funny is that I got the same feeling when I interviewed for my nightmare boss. That was the last time I ever accepted a job out of fear.

I get this feeling too! It's weird that within just 20 minutes, even though I'm doing most of the talking, I can read body language and the way they talk, how they are going to be like. I could tell this one boss of mine was going to be mean...should have trusted my gut.