Starting a new job with new attitude

[DoggyLady]

I would like to share about how I have changed in my attitude in career. How it has made a difference in how I see jobs.

For most part of my 12 year career, I was a passive shy inconfident person with low self esteem. My philosophy was "just be invisible in office. stay out of politics. Just do your job and then go home. "

But now in my mid thirties as a woman, I feel that I have changed.

I've just started a new job and I'm eager to please my boss. I want to impress him. I want to get as much performance bonus as i can. I want to become more capable in my job. and I want to nail down the maximum possible performance bonus in 2012 and 2011. I want to use the monetary returns to re-invest in myself, and to build better life and future for myself.

I want to start seeing my boss as a important team member, a person that i can support and be loyal to, instead of seeing him as a fearsome authority. I want to respect him as my leader and appreciate his difficult work as my leader.

I want to be a responsible and valuable and contributing member to the organisation, and to the people around me.

for the first time in my life, I'm having so many dreams and hopes abt my career. I used to be jaded about my career, due to low self confidence. but now i have learned to have more faith and love in myself and others.

Question is, how can I go about doing this in actual actions?

How do you do it?

How do you show your boss that you are serious, capable, Note that I'm still struggling with confidence and assertiveness, even though they are much improved.

how can I be a good support and contributors to my boss and colleagues?

How do I do this without looking like I am boot-polishing or trying to "seduce" my boss (i'm an attractive female single, and i like to dress prettily and sexily. AND I feel attracted to my boss) ?

Since we are on this, How do I conduct myself as a feminine woman in the office ? Since I used to just "bury my head in the sand", now I am very conscious of how i conduct myself in office. Sometimes i want to be "hard" (driven, serious) and sometimes i want to be "soft" (sweet, caring, dreamy). urgh, i don't know which of me to be now!!!

All ideas are welcome !!!

[DoggyLady]

Oh, I'm thinking of buying some cakes and distribute in office on monday, as a greeting gesture and to thank colleagues for training and supporting me since i'm relatively new.

That would be a nice gesture, wouldn't it?

I feel that it may also send out a message that i am making efforts to integrate myself in this company.

[Lioness]

Congratulations on your new job. IIRC, you were really struggling with finding a job? How'd you do it?

Originally Posted by DoggyLady

I want to be a responsible and valuable and contributing member to the organisation, and to the people around me.

Above all, do the job you were hired to do and do it with excellence. That's the best way to impress. Be willing to volunteer and go the extra mile and all that, but never neglect your main responsibilities.

Give yourself a chance to see what the culture of the organization is. Who are the up-and-coming movers and shakers, who are the more slacking partying type, what types of activities are people involved togerther, in and out of work. Who will it make the most sense for you to associate the most with.

Be personable, friendly and professional. Ask questions. This it tricky because you don't want to be a pest, but you want to ask intelligent, curious questions about the work your co-workers do in a way that flatters their expertise. Ask the kind of questions that make people think "wow, she's really on the ball".

I want to start seeing my boss as a important team member, a person that i can support and be loyal to, instead of seeing him as a fearsome authority. I want to respect him as my leader and appreciate his difficult work as my leader... How do I do this without looking like I am boot-polishing or trying to "seduce" my boss (i'm an attractive female single, and i like to dress prettily and sexily. AND I feel attracted to my boss) ?

Uh-oh. First of all do not flirt with your boss or entertain romantic ideas about him. (Is he married?) You want to do well in this job, not get embroiled in any drama. Ideally, keep your dating life out of the office. Too much gossip. Be professional. Let your boss set the tone of authoritarian vs. team member. Do not dress "sexily" on the job, you're there to work. You can still look attractive and stylish, but let your wardrobe state that you are to be taken seriously.

now I am very conscious of how i conduct myself in office. Sometimes i want to be "hard" (driven, serious) and sometimes i want to be "soft" (sweet, caring, dreamy). urgh, i don't know which of me to be now!!!

Err on the side of assertive seriousness. Showing your sense of humor when appropriate is fine, but you don't want to be perceived as giggly and silly. It's more effective to relax and show your soft side once you have established some respect, than start out being all sweet and girly, then try to earn respect later.

Bringing in cake or donuts is good. Just keep it simple. Too fancy screams brown-nosing IMO.

[Clint Cora]

Brian Tracy always offers great advice in this type of area. What he suggests overall is to always delivery more than you are asked for. This way, you show your boss that you are always giving more value that what you are actually paid. This way, it doesn't become like sucking up to the boss because what you contribute is good for the company and shows management that you are somebody with high value.

Also, it may take you some time to see who is who in your new job but scope out who you think might be good mentors. This might include your boss but it might include others too. Try to learn from those people.