Live on purpose vs hurt my loving girlfriend

[wearegods]

I am a web developer, spiritual writer and teacher and a lightworker.

My purpose is to build a website that creates passive income, much like Steve's website, but using my own experiences for my writings.

I want to do this and never work for someone else again.

Now, my Girlfriend, Tracey is such a wonderful loving person and she is my soul mate I am sure. I lover her beyond words.

the problem I am having is that I am trying to please her by doing things the way she thinks they should be done. More specifically, she still has the belief system that you must work hard for 30 of 40 years and this is success. If I speak about a potential job, she gets so happy and excited, if I speak of doing things my way or working from home and taking a risk to make us more money than a job could, she gets very nervous and upset.

I am past ready to go for my dreams, but here I set between jobs doing neither making both of us unhappy.

I swore after the job I just left because my boss was abusive, that I would proclaim my freedom and never do this again, but Tracey and her parents keep asking and pushing the idea of me getting back to work quickly.

I have a potentially good job offer that is not concrete yet, but may be in a day or so and I do not want to go through starting and leaving once I see that I am not happy again.

I also do not wish to hurt Tracey, or let her down in any way, so I would appreciate any advice you have. I believe one should be true to themselves at all costs, but apparently I do not believe it enough or I wouldn't be posting this message. emails a re welcome dennis_halsey@charter.net

Thank you

[cdn2wheeler]

There are lots of different issues at play here and they all deserve your attention. To name a few:

Your previous boss was abusive (which, alas, is very common) but that doesn't mean that ALL bosses are abusive **********. Are you setting up an expectation?

Since you're in a relationship, then your partner's wishes have to be taken into consideration. That's not to say that you have to aquiesce to everything she wants, but it does mean that her input should be valuable.

On a related note, you mentioned that you believe she's your "soul mate." Putting aside the metaphysical aspect of such a relationship (a subject for an entirely different thread, I'm sure ), would not a true "soul mate" be supportive of your dreams and desires?

Lastly, being "true to one's self" is certainly a laudable goal. But there are realities that need to be managed. Money is not everything, but nothing - and I do mean nothing - is improved by poverty.

You may consider something like this: Work on a plan with Tracey to generate regular income (such as this potential job offer) and a strict savings plan. Once you have sufficient resources in the bank to live on for, say, a year, then re-examine the feasibility of creating passive income through a website or something similar.

During that time, work on your passive income generator on the weekends and evenings.

This will do a few things:

• It will give you & Tracey a concrete, do-able goal to work towards;
• You'll build your financial security;
• Improved relationship with Tracey's folks (and, like it or not, parents are a HUGE influence, for better or worse);
• You'll have a better indication of how to generate this passive income without the pressures of relying on it 100% for your income.

Hope that helps.

[Erin Pavlina]

Tracey is scared, she wants security. She has no control over the situation but must count on you to be successful running your own business. It sounds like she has shared her concerns with her family who must, of course, want her to be secure financially as well so they are going to put pressure on her to put pressure on you to succeed. I would at the very least acknowledge to Tracey that you understand she desires financial security and let her know that you share her desire. At least then she will know you are not willing to starve to accomplish your dream.

As for some practical advice, Steve and I went through a similar experience when he decided to stop running his successful software company, take a huge income hit, and start a blog. Financial security was very important to me, but his happiness and him following his dream was even more important to me. I knew that if things didn't work out with stevepavlina.com that we could recover and get back on our feet. But not to have let him try would have been cruel I believe. I supported him 100% in his desire. And I ramped up my own income so we could get through the inevitable income dip.

It took faith, courage, and love. We had to push away fear, uncertainty and a need to control. But it all worked out for us and didn't take as long as we thought.

Is she bringing in an income? Is there a way for you to do what you want to do and also earn enough income on the side to keep you guys going while your site takes off? That's where my mind would be at this point.

[Bonkers]

I'd definitly show her this website and get her interested in looking at different paths to financial freedom, my girlfriend used to be in a similar mindset of get a job, work 40 years then retire and it was upon showing her stevepavlina that her eyes opened and she started supporting my endevours more and more.

Take that job and simply run your other business on the side until you get to an income level that you can "survive" on, then she will be far more likely to support you in quitting your job and being and enterprenaur fulltime.