[sk8joyful]

Originally Posted by Acting Like Godot

Important to also realise that it's about interdependence
- mutually helping each other.
I don't see old people in my country being leeches on their adult children.
Until they are really frail and ill and physically weak,
they are still very interested in contributing and helping the family.
The most obvious area is in looking after the grandkids.

Exactly.

Originally Posted by Acting Like Godot

In the USA, you would instead send your kids to a daycare centre or hire some teenager off the street to act as your babysitter. This really doesn't sound like a very attractive part of "independence" to me.

Well, any responsible parent is NOT gonna fish a strange/unknown teenager off the street, to babysit their kids.
That is just crazy! - And you're right about the blasted Day-care, & Pre-school.

My daughter NEVER was in one of those, even when I became a single parent.
I found work, at 1/2 my pay, so she could come to work with me; and
there, she learned all kinds of helpful skills, she was later thankful for.

Originally Posted by Acting Like Godot

Secondly, I also don't typically see adult children living with their parents as leeches, because these adult children also contribute in their own ways.
Typically they will give their parents some money every month, or they will take on the responsibility of paying for certain bills and expenses, eg power bill; water bill; groceries etc.
If they don't do the housework themselves, they will pay for a maid to do the job.

As I already said above: I would never ask my daughter
to take CARE of me, or to pay for Utilities, or for spending money, or pay a maid to do housework.

Originally Posted by Acting Like Godot

There are many practical advantages, big and small, in living near each other, even if you do not actually live WITH each other.
For example, once when my daughter was a baby, she fell ill and had to be hospitalised. My parents were of great help to me then, as they immediately stepped in to look after my son, while my wife and I camped at the hospital.
These are small things that just can't be done if I were living faraway from them.

When my daughter was in the hospital at age 7, I CAMPED right next to her, and
made sure she got out of there ALIVE, & in record time.

But when I was forced this past June, also from medical malpractice into the hospital,
she said on the phone: "I hope you find someone to help you Mom, cause it's not gonna be me"

And as I always tell her: "Sweetie, I love you with every fiber of my soul, & heart. And I forgive you, and I wish for you ALL the joy your heart can hold, and more "