Originally Posted by Shift
Can't help but notice this theme in North American culture where family is a burden that should be shipped off ASAP.
When we have kids, our freedom is gone.
When our kids legally become adults, it's time for them move out... ready or not.
When our parents get old, it's time for them to move into a nursing home.
Welcome to the most ass-backwards society on Earth.
Hmmm...I'm not sure if it would be called ass-backwards in North America. LOL.
I do have to say that in my personal experience, although elderly parents often do live in nursing homes, etc., usually it is still the children supporting them. My grandmother lives on her own but my father still cares for her in everyway she will allow him. She would very much resent having to dependent on him or anyone else and would never choose to live with her children unless there was no other choice. Honestly, she's expressed to me that she'd rather live in a nursing home or retirement villiage than in one of her childrens' homes.
I've spent A LOT of time in nursing homes because my family works in them...somehow about half of my female family members ended up being nurses, therapists, etc., that work in nursing homes. My mother manages the business office in one. THEY AREN'T ALWAYS AS BAD AS THEY ARE MADE OUT TO BE! They can actually be quite nice and allow elderly people to be involved in social activities with their peers while still under medical supervision so they are safe. You just have to keep a good eye out and visit regularly and LISTEN to your parents instead of treating them like children!
It's simply just personal preference. Even my Asian stepmother's father refused to live with his children once he moved to America. They tried to MAKE him (because they treated him like a child and decided he wouldn't know any better) and he continuously urinated all over everyone's belongings when people weren't home until they *allowed* him to move into his own apartment. After this, he was just fine with accepting help from his children. In his own apartment, he was allowed to have liquor and prostitutes and live just like he did in Taiwan. LOL. No one to tell him NO.
Her mother on the other hand, loved living with her. She seemed to do very well and get along with everyone pretty well. She was very helpful in everyway and things were rather harmonious. She did irritate my father quite a bit because he felt as if he was married to his wife and her mother and "Popo" sp? seemed to also feel he was hers just as much as her daughters. LOL. But they all loved each other nonetheless.
I think people should be allowed to live as they please, do what makes them happiest, and be allowed to break the cultural norm if it means being able to peacefully exist with your family.