Hi ChildOfNone, as I was lurking here, your posts in this thread struck me in several ways so I hope you don't mind getting some feedback and encouragement from a new member.
Firstly, I find your name really sad and lonely. Maybe it has a good meaning to you. If not then it would not help you in IM to self identify with a not so positive feeling.
You stand out to me as a very literate and thinking person, deliberate in finding ways to work out your issues. However, you may be thinking too much and depending too much on your own brainy resources, closing out inspirations and assistance from outside yourself that are not presented as conceptually inspiring messages. What I mean is your thinking seems to get so focused that you may get boxed in. In you IM, you devise solutions and try to manifest them rather than keeping the ultimate goal in mind and open up to different ways of achieving that goal. E.g. You have a legal issue currently so you figure you need a good lawyer to fight the case so you IM the best lawyer and also the financial means to retain this lawyer, plus organizing the others involved. Why not IM for the issue to be simply resolved, or better yet, dissolved, or even evolve into something positive, however this may happen? If it would come by way of a good lawyer, good, but the Universe may simply change the mind, or circumstances of the other side, or the solution may be manifested in one of a million possible ways. There is no small or big IM as far as the Universe is concerned. If you seek help from the Universe with IM, why the need and insistence to do things the hard way, i.e. your way?
I too find staying in the presence very calming. I tell myself and others who are stressed out that most of the time you really only have to deal with or face your troubles for a few minutes, why torture yourselves for hours and days? Why do the work for those who want to bother, stress or pressure you? They themselves don't even spend that kind of energy to stress you, especially if it's not personal, just doing their job, for example. Most of the "now" moments of the day and night, nothing bad is happening and you can enjoy the time, use it to relax, or look for things in your life to be grateful for instead of dreading, rehearsing, or making arguments in your head. Worries are simply worst case scenarios you make up in your mind about the future, which does not exist. Since you control your mind, why not make up the best case scenarios instead and enjoy them? In a way, that is IM, n'est ce pas?
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