I agree with Zhereford. It sounds like, although you probably don't realize it consciously, you have been depending on this guy (and probably every other romantic relationship) to provide certain things for you -- happiness, love, security, romance, support, etc. Unfortunately, being depended upon for these things feels really constricting, because each person must generate them for herself. That is too much of a burden, and it feels awful. Once both people in the relationship are bountifully generating, only then can they have a real partnership in which they can take turns filling in the occasional value gaps in one another's lives.
So your job, whether you stay in this relationship or not, is to start bountifully generating the values that you are missing, and sharing that value with everybody you come across (not just the guy)!
What would make a difference for you if it were present? Self-confidence? Go to Toastmasters. Security? Take an improv class. Support? Weight-training! There are infinite ways to help you generate what you want.
I really recommend the Landmark Forum, too. I think you'd love it.
Best wishes,
Angela
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